I don't understand
- Thread starter spiritleadme23
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C
I find that so weird, the idea that people first need money and jobs and a house. You don't have kids yet. And it all has to be insanely expensive. So much people that age hook up in some cheap room. Why not marry? Now they wait an eternity until they have enough money and meanwhile they live in sin.
I for one cannot judge anyone as my own situation isn't the best but i feel as thou u have left out quite a bit of important information. .... No man with a brain just turns and runs from a catch . U have some red flags . Do u live at home (with parents), are u a drinker, do u have a job , how big is your ego(is it me,me,me all the time) , we need more information so we can help u ...
C
If I can make an educated guess based on the OP:
too desperate for a guy. Put God first and pray He sends someone in His time and better stay away from dating sites for a while and don't listen to people who say you have to put yourself out there. If God wants you to find Mr. Right on a datingsite and it is the right time He'll tell you. If He doesn't tell you to do it, don't.
too desperate for a guy. Put God first and pray He sends someone in His time and better stay away from dating sites for a while and don't listen to people who say you have to put yourself out there. If God wants you to find Mr. Right on a datingsite and it is the right time He'll tell you. If He doesn't tell you to do it, don't.
*Lynx catches up on the thread and notices a lot of arguing...
Oh yeah? OH YEAH?! Well I'm right and ALL OF YOU are wrong! And I'm going to prove I'm right and I'm going to prove all of you are wrong. And I'm going to keep proving it until you admit I'm right, or until you give up and go away and let me feel like I won the argument. SO THERE!
Oh yeah? OH YEAH?! Well I'm right and ALL OF YOU are wrong! And I'm going to prove I'm right and I'm going to prove all of you are wrong. And I'm going to keep proving it until you admit I'm right, or until you give up and go away and let me feel like I won the argument. SO THERE!
Thank you everyone who gave me constructive feedback.
To those who criticize my age I may be young but I know who I am in Christ and that's the only identity that truly matters. As someone else has mentioned numerous times, God is in control of everything so why would we think He is not in control of our finances? The only financial stability that exists is giving the control to God. You have a full-time job with a decent salary? That's all well and good but God could take it away at any moment if He chose in order to make you fully depend on Him. I have friends that got married their second year of college and now in their senior year they have a newborn son. They make it work because they trust in God for provision, and they are both younger than I.
To those who criticize my age I may be young but I know who I am in Christ and that's the only identity that truly matters. As someone else has mentioned numerous times, God is in control of everything so why would we think He is not in control of our finances? The only financial stability that exists is giving the control to God. You have a full-time job with a decent salary? That's all well and good but God could take it away at any moment if He chose in order to make you fully depend on Him. I have friends that got married their second year of college and now in their senior year they have a newborn son. They make it work because they trust in God for provision, and they are both younger than I.
First off, you are 23 and as has been pointed out by others; there are very few 23 year old guys who want to take on the responsibilities of a wife and marriage. While I disagree with the prevailing attitude, there is definitely the attitude among young people that they can be in relationships for fun and enjoy the fun of a relationship without the permanent commitment of marriage. That means there are a lot of people who's goal is dating, not marriage. It also doesn't help that the lines between friendship and dating are quite blurred in a lot of circles.
Oftentimes online profiles are not true to life. One of the challenges of getting to know someone online is usually you are removed from their social group, you don't see them interacting with the other people they know so you don't know how their interactions with you compare to their normal. This makes it really easy to lie or put up a false front online. When someone creates an entire fictitious personality for the purpose of starting a "fantasy" relationship with someone else, that's called cat fishing and it happens on Christian sites as well (after all Christians can be very trusting and gullible). All that to say that maybe all these great guys with similar beliefs etc that you're finding online don't really exist.
Personal to you though: exactly how aggressive are you in pursuing the conversation with these guys? I know for me that if I wanted some space a day or two wouldn't even begin to feel like I was being given space. I also know that I'm usually polite enough to respond to someone who initiates contact with me even if I have no interest in them. So I think it is quite possible that you are interpreting a couple casual conversations as interested in pursuing you, when the guy has just been collecting information and has collected enough to decide that it's not going to work out and he's not going to pursue you. Also possible that some of the guys you are talking to want a rebellious church girl who wants to push the limits of sin rather than a truly godly woman. God's protecting you in that case, but it still hurts to be rejected.
The other thing I would encourage you to do is spend some serious, honest time with God asking him to show you exactly how much value you are placing on a man's interest and whether it is becoming an idol to you or not. It's easy to say God's #1 especially when there's no other guy in your life, but it's hard even for the best of us to have a guy in our lives who is paying attention and actively caring and saying all the things we want to hear, and not feel like God has some competition. It's possible you were just having a bad day when you posted, but if this is a constant feeling with you, I would be double checking whether I was really willing to be obedient if God asked me to remain single for a while or if I was ready to compromise my faith or standards to have a relationship. Which leads me to a final point: regardless of what you were "created for" (and I'm starting to see that phrase as code for God somehow owes me because he made me and I want it this way) you are single today and your challenge is to live your life as a holy, godly single woman today.
Oh and welcome to CC. Hope you stick around and get to know some of the awesome people around here. It's a great place to make friends and get support for the challenges of being a single Christian adult.
Oftentimes online profiles are not true to life. One of the challenges of getting to know someone online is usually you are removed from their social group, you don't see them interacting with the other people they know so you don't know how their interactions with you compare to their normal. This makes it really easy to lie or put up a false front online. When someone creates an entire fictitious personality for the purpose of starting a "fantasy" relationship with someone else, that's called cat fishing and it happens on Christian sites as well (after all Christians can be very trusting and gullible). All that to say that maybe all these great guys with similar beliefs etc that you're finding online don't really exist.
Personal to you though: exactly how aggressive are you in pursuing the conversation with these guys? I know for me that if I wanted some space a day or two wouldn't even begin to feel like I was being given space. I also know that I'm usually polite enough to respond to someone who initiates contact with me even if I have no interest in them. So I think it is quite possible that you are interpreting a couple casual conversations as interested in pursuing you, when the guy has just been collecting information and has collected enough to decide that it's not going to work out and he's not going to pursue you. Also possible that some of the guys you are talking to want a rebellious church girl who wants to push the limits of sin rather than a truly godly woman. God's protecting you in that case, but it still hurts to be rejected.
The other thing I would encourage you to do is spend some serious, honest time with God asking him to show you exactly how much value you are placing on a man's interest and whether it is becoming an idol to you or not. It's easy to say God's #1 especially when there's no other guy in your life, but it's hard even for the best of us to have a guy in our lives who is paying attention and actively caring and saying all the things we want to hear, and not feel like God has some competition. It's possible you were just having a bad day when you posted, but if this is a constant feeling with you, I would be double checking whether I was really willing to be obedient if God asked me to remain single for a while or if I was ready to compromise my faith or standards to have a relationship. Which leads me to a final point: regardless of what you were "created for" (and I'm starting to see that phrase as code for God somehow owes me because he made me and I want it this way) you are single today and your challenge is to live your life as a holy, godly single woman today.
Oh and welcome to CC. Hope you stick around and get to know some of the awesome people around here. It's a great place to make friends and get support for the challenges of being a single Christian adult.
From what I have been told nursing is a very competitive field to get into work-wise.
I know a young nurse who works at a school.
You can work at a clinic or at a hospital too.
The people I know who work or worked at a hospital all told me that the new employees, no matter what department you work in, were given the shifts that no-one else wanted. Plus your work 12 hours shifts, and you could very well end up working rotating shifts. You had to have seniority to get a better shift.
Of course I do not know where your niece wants to work, but I know I would not want to work in a hospital if I was her age and married. That would put too much stress on me as well as on our marriage.
I know a young nurse who works at a school.
You can work at a clinic or at a hospital too.
The people I know who work or worked at a hospital all told me that the new employees, no matter what department you work in, were given the shifts that no-one else wanted. Plus your work 12 hours shifts, and you could very well end up working rotating shifts. You had to have seniority to get a better shift.
Of course I do not know where your niece wants to work, but I know I would not want to work in a hospital if I was her age and married. That would put too much stress on me as well as on our marriage.
