Trust.....deal or no deal.

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Rosesrock

Guest
#1
My kids are all home this summer and we were talking for hours about dating, praying and actively waiting for that special someone.
My oldest daughter said.... Pfft. Can you even believe what a guy says? They just say what they think girls want to hear.
My son pipes up and said.....whoa? Wait a sec... Girls do the exact same thing.
As I listen to these young adults talk about trying to sift through the issues of relationships ...why is trust so hard these days??

Thoughts??
 
Mar 22, 2013
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#4
Gotcha. Cynicism killed the thread. Might as well delete it.
I just spoke the truth. some people don't like hearing the truth. but truth is, people lie cheat and steal. why trust anyone when chances are they are just going to lie to you, or steal from you, or cheat on you (if in relationship)
 
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Rosesrock

Guest
#5
I just spoke the truth. some people don't like hearing the truth. but truth is, people lie cheat and steal. why trust anyone when chances are they are just going to lie to you, or steal from you, or cheat on you (if in relationship)
So that's the question. Should we believe the worst in everyone ??
There should be a time of 'proving' one is who they say they are. Right?
 
Mar 22, 2013
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#6
So that's the question. Should we believe the worst in everyone ??
There should be a time of 'proving' one is who they say they are. Right?
nope, I don't get that privilege, so I ain't giving that privilege to anyone else.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#7
To have trust in a relationship you must first allow yourself to become vulnerable to the other so that trust can be developed. Honesty from both parties is critical.
 
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Susanna

Guest
#8
Trust is so important, it's the foundation upon which we are building our lives. Without trust our lives are miserable. I think that is why trust is so hard...we are so dependent on it.
 
May 25, 2016
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#9
It's hard because everyone's moral compass is calibrated differently. I firmly believe that people aren't as trustworthy as they used to be, especially when it comes to relationships.

My first gf in high school was my wake up call. I hadn't spoke to her for a few days so I gave her a call, she went on to inform me that she met a guy at church camp and we were done. I've been guarded ever since.
 
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Rosesrock

Guest
#10
nope, I don't get that privilege, so I ain't giving that privilege to anyone else.
So why the trust issues is my next question and thanks for sharing.

I reflect on my own trust issues as my kids talked. I'm intrigued. How does one get so jaded?
Family, some kind of crisis, hurt? Mine is from adoption. Issues I never understood until I allowed the Lord to grow me.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#11
I'm at the point now where finding friends to trust is reasonable, but still risky. But when it comes to romance, it's not worth it.
 
Mar 22, 2013
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#12
So why the trust issues is my next question and thanks for sharing.

I reflect on my own trust issues as my kids talked. I'm intrigued. How does one get so jaded?
Family, some kind of crisis, hurt? Mine is from adoption. Issues I never understood until I allowed the Lord to grow me.
I learned long ago, people are not to be trusted, and with what I see every day I am proven right.

DTA Don't trust anyone.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#13
It's hard because everyone's moral compass is calibrated differently. I firmly believe that people aren't as trustworthy as they used to be, especially when it comes to relationships.

My first gf in high school was my wake up call. I hadn't spoke to her for a few days so I gave her a call, she went on to inform me that she met a guy at church camp and we were done. I've been guarded ever since.
Church camp? Maybe he was a choir boy? No, I might be thinking of band camp.
 
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Rosesrock

Guest
#14
I'm at the point now where finding friends to trust is reasonable, but still risky. But when it comes to romance, it's not worth it.
I learned long ago, people are not to be trusted, and with what I see every day I am proven right.

DTA Don't trust anyone.
Ugh this is sad. Although I understand it.
 
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Rosesrock

Guest
#16
not sure what is so sad about what I say, it is just how it is.
To close one off from the trust of anyone? Super sad. The cynical part of Pfftt. I'm not going to trust you enough to be hurt. I'm sure you trust someone. At least one person. But yes.. Not feeling like you can fellowship with anyone because of not trusting them .....to me is sad.
If it doesn't bother you then great.
My opinion ....but the idea to not trust anyone leads to a hard heart. But again that's the reason for the discussion.
I appreciate your posts.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
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#17
Hmm... so many people thinking this is a modern thing, this not being able to trust people stuff. This is as old as Cain and Abel.

Anyone remember the story of Joseph? His master's wife tried to make a move, and when he wouldn't play along she lied on him. That's just one of the many, many stories in the Bible alone, not to mention all the other records we have from times before.

Ask your grandparents about the people they went out with before they found their spouses. Bet you'll get an earful. ;)
 
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Rosesrock

Guest
#18
Hmm... so many people thinking this is a modern thing, this not being able to trust people stuff. This is as old as Cain and Abel.

Anyone remember the story of Joseph? His master's wife tried to make a move, and when he wouldn't play along she lied on him. That's just one of the many, many stories in the Bible alone, not to mention all the other records we have from times before.

Ask your grandparents about the people they went out with before they found their spouses. Bet you'll get an earful. ;)
I totally agree but I think back to Hannah who in the mist is ridicule from her sister wife, she never complained and trusted fully in God's promises.
But I do think of Sarah where she controlled the situation and two nations were born out of not trusting.
So how do we learn to trust? Cause clearly by ourselves we suck at it.
 
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GraceRevelation

Guest
#19
I learned long ago, people are not to be trusted, and with what I see every day I am proven right.

DTA Don't trust anyone.

I completely understand where your coming from but if you want any kind of relationship some trust has to be there. For some people that can take some time to develop. I personally believe though if your a christian you don't need to have your guard up and you can allow people to get to know you, God protects us from people that have the wrong intentions against us or the holy spirit speaks to us about a particular person. I'm a person that has had a lot of trust issues with people but I've come to the conclusion that I'm not protecting myself by being defensive or having my guard up and protecting my self from the pain of being let down but I'm keeping myself from having good relationships with people. This is another area especially if you have trust issues you need to give to God and know that he's protecting you against people that mean harm. You don't need to tell everyone your whole life story and give your personal information over but let your guard down and ask God to help you to do that. Life is much better this way. I know you didn't ask anyone's opinion but just throwin this out there :D
 
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GraceRevelation

Guest
#20
Oh and to Roserock :), why is trusting so hard these days? Because a lot of people lie it's almost a "normal" thing you see these days. If your like me and believe were living in the end times then it's kind of like yea this makes sense lol. The good thing is with God we don't have to watch our backs and protect ourselves because he does that for us. So honestly we can relax and trust in him that whoever we come in contact with we are free to be open and to be ourselves with no worry of harm. If we get a feeling not to say a certain thing or to stop talking to a certain person then we need to follow the leading of the Holy Spirit of course but other wise relax :D