The joy of being single
- Thread starter Spiritualpixie
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A certain comedian put it best.
"When you're single you got single money. That's my money, I can do what I want with it. When you're married you and your wife throw all your money into one pot... and then you spend the rest of your life circling this thing.
Getting tired yet babe?
Wake up one morning - where'd all this new furniture come from?
'I thought I'd let you sleep in today.'
Next morning the wife wakes up - is that a new bass boat in the driveway?
'Your turn to sleep late honeybunch.'"
"When you're single you got single money. That's my money, I can do what I want with it. When you're married you and your wife throw all your money into one pot... and then you spend the rest of your life circling this thing.
Getting tired yet babe?
Wake up one morning - where'd all this new furniture come from?
'I thought I'd let you sleep in today.'
Next morning the wife wakes up - is that a new bass boat in the driveway?
'Your turn to sleep late honeybunch.'"
There were things I loved about being married and I've rediscovered things I loved about being single. Each season of life has its perks. I bet all of us could list at least 5 things we really enjoy about being single. It isn't to disrespect being in a relationship but really no matter where we are relationship-wise it is all good.
M
I have been weighing the joys and the hardships of being single and the loneliness is sometimes overwhelming, but I hang out with women and it reminds me of the peace I have when I am alone. No offence ladies, but it is next to impossible to find the exact match "made in heaven".
I was stranded on my mining claim all last summer for 5 months, very long story. I prayed all summer that the Lord would find me a woman. This was a very specific prayer request. This woman had to love Jesus as much as I do, and desire to seek Him every moment of every day, together whenever possible. AND I had to be romantically attracted to her. When I came home to Paradise I met many women, and dated a few, but was sorrowful because of the wants and desires were always so diverse. The first woman I dated loved Jesus as much as I did, but we just did not hit it off romantically, then the next was the exact opposite.
I have come to the conclusion that the "social" networks have spoiled us by giving such a variety to choose from. Before the internet we had to actually talk to each other and set up times and dates by actually speaking to each other which, I believe made it much easier to decide if we were right for each other, and much of the time we would settle for each other despite differences. The "social" networks have taken all that away, and with all the choices many men and women are waiting for that perfect union made in heaven, but it will never happen. Certainly there is the 1 in a million who have found happiness through the internet, but far too many are waiting for something that will never happen because our standards are so high and we will not settle to be happy to accept each other despite our differences.
I was stranded on my mining claim all last summer for 5 months, very long story. I prayed all summer that the Lord would find me a woman. This was a very specific prayer request. This woman had to love Jesus as much as I do, and desire to seek Him every moment of every day, together whenever possible. AND I had to be romantically attracted to her. When I came home to Paradise I met many women, and dated a few, but was sorrowful because of the wants and desires were always so diverse. The first woman I dated loved Jesus as much as I did, but we just did not hit it off romantically, then the next was the exact opposite.
I have come to the conclusion that the "social" networks have spoiled us by giving such a variety to choose from. Before the internet we had to actually talk to each other and set up times and dates by actually speaking to each other which, I believe made it much easier to decide if we were right for each other, and much of the time we would settle for each other despite differences. The "social" networks have taken all that away, and with all the choices many men and women are waiting for that perfect union made in heaven, but it will never happen. Certainly there is the 1 in a million who have found happiness through the internet, but far too many are waiting for something that will never happen because our standards are so high and we will not settle to be happy to accept each other despite our differences.
M
The only problem with being alone, especially at my age is getting up the boldness to strike up a conversation with strangers. I tried online dating sites just to be brushed off far too many times.
But I understand very well where you are coming from. I just had a run in with two women who gossip far too much and I was the victim too often. I just had to finally tell them it is too hard to hang out with them. What hurt the most is that they professed to be Christians, and we even studied the bible together, but the backstabbing just shows the hypocrisy of the situation and sadly I had to quit hanging out with them.
But I understand very well where you are coming from. I just had a run in with two women who gossip far too much and I was the victim too often. I just had to finally tell them it is too hard to hang out with them. What hurt the most is that they professed to be Christians, and we even studied the bible together, but the backstabbing just shows the hypocrisy of the situation and sadly I had to quit hanging out with them.
I agree. I think the online world is too 2 dimensional to make a sure connection. You only have an image. The only relationships that have really worked for me are when I've met someone and there is a spark of recognition. We see something in the other person that says "I get you". For me it is like tuning in on a radio station. A lot of people have a degree of static but every now and again you meet someone and the signal is crystal clear. Looks do not dictate whom you hear. The voice, smile, energy they emit (calm, frantic, strong positive sense of humour, enjoyment of life, passion for Christ), these are all things that are so hard to discover through written words and an image. I hope one day you find someone who makes you feel like you are home. 
M
I agree. I think the online world is too 2 dimensional to make a sure connection. You only have an image. The only relationships that have really worked for me are when I've met someone and there is a spark of recognition. We see something in the other person that says "I get you". For me it is like tuning in on a radio station. A lot of people have a degree of static but every now and again you meet someone and the signal is crystal clear. Looks do not dictate whom you hear. The voice, smile, energy they emit (calm, frantic, strong positive sense of humour, enjoyment of life, passion for Christ), these are all things that are so hard to discover through written words and an image. I hope one day you find someone who makes you feel like you are home.
I'm a single 50 something. There are things I like about being single and things I don't.
Don't - My world, the US, is very focused on being paired up or married. The church is too. Single people feel it in subtle ways. My pastor has even preached about it.
Many couples don;t associate closely with singles, especially women. Wives are the gatekeepers of the social calendar. Many of them feel threatened by single women; many wouldn't admit to it, but they do.
Going home alone and being alone too much of the time.
It is really really difficult to meet healthy Christians who want to socialize.
Many single friends my age, even Christians, seem to be overly focused on getting married again.
Singles don't want to socialize with other singles very often - I have no idea why.
I hate dong EVERYTHING - cooking, cleaning, car responsibilities, paying the bills, taxes, household fixes, making consequential purchases by myself, EVERYTHING.
LIKE - not having to explain my decisions to someone.
buying what I like when i like.
having popcorn for dinner every night for a month - haha
Being able to leave my mess where ever I want and for as long as I want.
Not having to compromise on much of anything.
I am fine with compromising and figuring out how to divy up the duties and such if I get married....
There are other things I like and don't like...this is what came up without too much thinking.
Don't - My world, the US, is very focused on being paired up or married. The church is too. Single people feel it in subtle ways. My pastor has even preached about it.
Many couples don;t associate closely with singles, especially women. Wives are the gatekeepers of the social calendar. Many of them feel threatened by single women; many wouldn't admit to it, but they do.
Going home alone and being alone too much of the time.
It is really really difficult to meet healthy Christians who want to socialize.
Many single friends my age, even Christians, seem to be overly focused on getting married again.
Singles don't want to socialize with other singles very often - I have no idea why.
I hate dong EVERYTHING - cooking, cleaning, car responsibilities, paying the bills, taxes, household fixes, making consequential purchases by myself, EVERYTHING.
LIKE - not having to explain my decisions to someone.
buying what I like when i like.
having popcorn for dinner every night for a month - haha
Being able to leave my mess where ever I want and for as long as I want.
Not having to compromise on much of anything.
I am fine with compromising and figuring out how to divy up the duties and such if I get married....
There are other things I like and don't like...this is what came up without too much thinking.
Being single is tough, there's no doubt about that.
But take an hour reading the threads in the Family Forum about all the people who are very unhappily married, have spouses who aren't there for them, or are going through a myriad of other problems...
And you'll soon realize that there are a lot of married people out there--sometimes it seems like the majority of them--who are in even worse situations than we are.
But take an hour reading the threads in the Family Forum about all the people who are very unhappily married, have spouses who aren't there for them, or are going through a myriad of other problems...
And you'll soon realize that there are a lot of married people out there--sometimes it seems like the majority of them--who are in even worse situations than we are.