Hey there, fellow single peeps!
In a recent post, a member stated that they would decline an invitation to socialize if they felt the person inviting them was only inviting (or "patronizing") them so that they wouldn't be alone, but was not sincere in genuinely wanting this person's company.
The Google definition of "patronize" came up as:
"To treat with an apparent kindness that betrays a feeling of superiority."
Synonyms: to treat condescendingly, to look down upon, to treat like a child, to treat with disdain.
I'm sure we've all had situations where someone has invited us to something and we weren't sure how sincere they really were. Even in my own family, I can pretty much hear the, "Oh, we should probably invite lonely old 'Gonna Turn Into a Crazy Cat Lady Any Day Now' Aunt Seoul..."
before I'm even asked.
Have people patronized you as a single? (Or even just in general--everyone, single or not, is welcome to answer.)
How can you tell if someone genuinely wants you to come along, or if they're just asking because they feel sorry for you?
Would it make a difference in whether or not you accept?
And what if the person IS actually being sincere? I'm thinking about all the fun times many of us might have missed because we thought someone else wasn't working hard enough to REALLY make us feel included, or were just too prideful to ADMIT we were alone by accepting an invitation. Although we singles don't want to admit it, sometimes I think we get a little bitter about our singleness--and feel as if people should have to work a bit more to REALLY make us feel wanted.
Do people always patronize us? Or, are we sometimes just being prideful in order to try to hang on to our (single) dignity?
