Are you being smart about your goals?

[Hellooo]

In the spirit of embracing the new year, (and since we've had many resolution threads pop up)

A big part of why a lot of people regularly struggle with annual resolutions, or struggle with achieving their goals, is that they aren't clearly defining their goals or outlining a concrete plan of action to reach their objectives.
The end result is left up to chance and emotions

Setting 'smart' goals is applicable to virtually any situation, whether it's getting out of debt, spending more time with family, volunteering, weight loss, starting/running a business, writing a book, getting a degree, etc etc

Food for thought.

 

[Lynx]

Reminds me of what our pastor said last Sunday.

"When I was the youth pastor I got the youth group to write down what they wanted to accomplish in the new year. We put it in an envelope and then at the end of the year we opened it to see how they had done. Out of 15 people, 13 of them put "I want to be closer to God."

After a couple years of this I got tired of it. When they said "I want to be closer to God" I started pressing them to define how they were going to accomplish that. Are you reading your bible more, praying more, fasting more, what?"

 

[Lenardzw]

Goals that haven't received full and thorough consideration end up turning into a wishlist of things one would most definitely want to do, someday, sort of. Huh?

 

[Lenardzw]

Reminds me of what our pastor said last Sunday.

"When I was the youth pastor I got the youth group to write down what they wanted to accomplish in the new year. We put it in an envelope and then at the end of the year we opened it to see how they had done. Out of 15 people, 13 of them put "I want to be closer to God."

After a couple years of this I got tired of it. When they said "I want to be closer to God" I started pressing them to define how they were going to accomplish that. Are you reading your bible more, praying more, fasting more, what?"

I agree with your pastor Lynx. That "getting closer to God" desire needs to be something that is intentional, deliberate and planned, because its the most important of all. "When is the best time to read the Bible?" (its different for different people and in different seasons of life) Its only through the in-dwelling Holy Spirit that we can truly grow in our walk with God. Without Him we are wasting time. This is why Christ promised the Holy Spirit. But we do need to invest time and effort into our growth, take responsibility for it and take time to assess it. We can't afford to approach this flippantly.

Had a similar mindset at one of our group studies last year. We were discussing the Christian approach to personal finances and we started to get practical. It was amazing how people were not prepared to put much thought into this. "I guess I can cut down on some expenses" was the common approach.

 

[Hellooo]

Great input guys!

Perfect illustration lynx. Taking a few extra steps and askeing the kids a few things like 'what does being closer to God look like? What obstacles are currently in your way?' , defining actions like fasting, prayer, study...
takes that conversation from an abstract dream to some tangible steps

Also, that facial expression is funny, Lenard

 

[OneFaith]

In the spirit of embracing the new year, (and since we've had many resolution threads pop up)

A big part of why a lot of people regularly struggle with annual resolutions, or struggle with achieving their goals, is that they aren't clearly defining their goals or outlining a concrete plan of action to reach their objectives.
The end result is left up to chance and emotions

Setting 'smart' goals is applicable to virtually any situation, whether it's getting out of debt, spending more time with family, volunteering, weight loss, starting/running a business, writing a book, getting a degree, etc etc

Food for thought.

When someone is in prison for decades (That reminds me Charles Manson got out of prison today), anyways, it's like they took a leap from 1980 to 2017. They get back into life, and there's iPads and self registers- just a lot to catch up with. (That reminds me, they are coming up with no registers- just take your items and walk out the door, and a bill will be sent to your email). Ok, stay focused. Anyways...

Thats what it's like for someone who's been in depression- like they've been in a pit, and have finally made their way out into the daylight. I remember when my cousin got her first bank checks or drivers license at the appropriate age. I was held captive both physically and mentally (kidnapped as a teen, and abused for many years). When I got free and reached milestones, people thought I should be far beyond where I am by now, and expect as much or more from me than is right. It's like being a 16 year old in a 45 year old's body.

So I have only thus far had the goal to reach normal- to get up to zero so can start being above ground instead of below ground. I have to start by shedding off all the things I've gained during abuse- such as a sense of self-worth, to lose weight because food was my only comfort, to gain confidence, and my mind back- changing my ways of thinking that were installed in me (constant verbal abuse).

Then, when I come up to zero, I can look around, like a high school grad, and think what do I want to do with my life, now that it's basically too late. So far I've just been surviving, not living. But now I'm to the point that I believe I will reach zero this year, and when 2018 hits, I don't know what my goals will be, since all my resolutions will be done.

The most important life fulfillment is to love and obey God- that one I've always done no matter what. Still I wonder, what's next for me? Just to grow old and die? Knowing that at the very least I fought the good fight and Satan couldn't make me give up on God? There has been a whisper in my heart to do some writing, who knows? But this year is about completeing every resolution once and for all- with an actual step plan this time.

Good talk. lol

 

[Dino246]

Food for thought.

Smart goals are a great idea. I'm not convinced yet about smmmarrrrrt goals... too complex for today.
I think I'll settle for smrt... Saturday Means Relax Time. And, speaking of food...

 

[wwjd_kilden]

My goal is to get a job and an apartment... It's starting to feel unrealistic
Maybe I should make my goal winning a lottery, that seems to have better odds

 

[Hellooo]

Thanks for sharing your goals, onefaith and wwjd_kilden!

You guys have an idea of what you want to accomplish, if you haven't done so already, I would flesh it out even more and define the actions you have to take to make progress.

Like when you mention gaining confidence, what does that look like to you onefaith? Being able to give a public speech or performance? Speaking out against abuse and reaching out to other people in similar circumstances? What is it that you'd like to be able to do as someone with more confidence that you currently haven't been able to do?
This isn't some woo-woo prosperity gospel name it and claim it technique...the more specific you can be, you can then formulate specific actions you can take (joining a toastmasters, taking part in the women's ministry at church, keeping a prayer journal) you can always make revisions as needed, but to go back to what Lenard touched on before, your goals stop being wishlist items and become things you are working on

Wwjd_kilden, job hunting can be so incredibly discouraging! I know you've previously touched on some of your job hunt struggles on the misc board. do whatever is within your control...keep chugging away at applications, follow up on the ones you've already submitted, attend job fairs (not sure if they do that in your area of the world?), go to temp agencies, go to networking events, hit up your church community for any opportunities, reach out to the career department of your old school if they have one, expand your search to other cities/countries/maybe even other career paths. Don't be afraid to ask for feedback as well, ask for critique of your cv, or in interviews, ask if there's anything you can elaborate on that would help in the decision making process. Even if you haven't got your job yet, there are a lot of steps you can be taking in the meantime...I'm praying and rooting for you!


Also, dropping this link here, I thought the study was interesting.
Study focuses on strategies for achieving goals, resolutions — Dominican University of California

 

[wwjd_kilden]

I've given up on asking for critique of my CV, because all the companies contradict each other

The one I currently use was made while I was in a "job applicant training" course thingy though, so hopefully it is OK.
What I keep being told is I don't have enough experience or that I lack knowledge in so- and - such area (tend be be different for each position, so I guess I have to know everything vaguely related to it )

I will soon be starting on a thingy that will theoretically give me a one- year "practice period" via a company that helps people who have difficulties getting a job. If they do what has been promised that is great, but it is more likely I am just placed somewhere to "keep me busy" for a year without actually teaching me anything (at least that's how employers tend to act in Norway...)

yea, there are some job fairs, most of them have been while I have been at (temporary) jobs though
they also tend to aim more at the ... uh ... handyman kinds of jobs, or the kind you need a masters degree for.

 

[Hellooo]

An episode of a podcast I heard recently, it's a cool story (about 12 minutes) of a guy with MS who was trying to improve his speed of walking across a room in order to get insurance approval for a medication, I think it's pretty relevant to the topic here

Listen here:
https://themoth.org/stories/jesse-owens-michael-phelps-and-me