"Submissive" and Marriage!!

[Angelsnow]

Wish more men....thought like you!!!!!

Ugh...if only i were a younger woman!!!!

(((Hugs))))

Thank you for sharing your beliefs with me!!!

GBU

Ooh! I like lists!

1. Employment?

Let her work. I see no problem with that. I just hope she can still spend quality time with the kids.

2. Cooking? (Housekeeping)

Well, the Bible does have that theme of the wives managing the house. Still, if a man wants to cook and clean from time to time, let him do it! I see no sin in that.

3. Child Rearing?

Both parents should raise the children, although it is best if there is one person who is mostly at home for the kids. Again, I see the woman doing that.

4. Education?

Hmm...home school vs. public school. Some say public school is evil, some think it's all right. I'm a little neutral when it comes to that, since I heard both sides. Oh wait, wrong question. Uh, I think both parents are responsible for the child's education, whether with home school or sending them to public school...or even a Christian private school.

5. Traditional? -- (in what way?)

Tradition? What tradition? As long as we're following the Bible, it doesn't really matter what tradition you uphold.

6. How should a man behave at home behind closed doors?

As long as it's not a sin, however he wants. Same with the woman.

7. How should your wife (or potential wife) dress and behave at home?

At home? As long as she's dressing modesty, she can wear pretty much whatever she wants. Now, if it's just my wife and I, in our bedroom, by ourselves, she can wear or not wear clothes. As far as behavior, as long as it's not a sin, she can behave how she wants.

8. Is your wife (or potential) permitted to disagree and say no. (without being punished)

She can disagree with me, and if I ask her to sin, of course she should say no! As long as she's adhering to the Scriptures.

Now, as for punishment, are you talking about me punishing her? What? Is that my job? I highly doubt it, but correct me if I'm wrong.

9. Is it okay for her to have goals and dreams that might be different than yours?

Yes.

Honestly, we both have brains, so really, if I ever get married, I want our household to be one of freedom, within Biblical bounds.

 

[Angelsnow]

WOW...i so feel as you do....

That without someone to challenge us...there is little real passion? or ...true excitement in love. (or life)

Hope you find someone very special for you....you sound like a true wonderful man.

Sorry you are divorced...perhaps. you will reconcile? ...(or begin anew with someone you can grow old with)

GBU

"Husbands love your lives as Christ loved the church..." Its possible the word "submissive" will take on a different meaning when a man truly loves his wife as Christ intended and as Paul meant. i have never believed that parents somewhere bring a girl into this world and then nurture her,love,raise, discipline, teach and invest in their daughter for some guy to come along and make her his doormat or make her subservient to him. A woman doesn't willingly leave her home and family to become "Mrs Blogs" just to become his gofer.

If I marry again,I have no problem with her working and pursuing her career. I don't have a problem sharing chores and cooking (I did this with my ex-wife). Child rearing is our collective responsibility. Our roles will be different but both parents are needed to nurture and raise a child. You'll notice that I'm skipping some. Still giving those some thought... Traditional? I'm still trying to work out what that means. Whose traditions? Does she have to be docile and pliable doing all chores and always agreeing with her (very fallible) hubby to be traditional? No mind or thoughts of her own? I doubt it. I want someone with a mind of her own. Someone who can challenge me to be a better man. I don't really care how she dresses. As a Christian wife it will be reasonable to leave this to her. I'd rather she brings up her goals and dreams and we discuss them and see how these as well as my own fit into our family life. Can we incorporate them and make them work? What adjustments would we need to make. Are we willing to pay the cost? I'd rather have this than a wife who is resentful some 14 years later when she feels let down and like she's made all the sacrifices for the marriage.

 

[Angelsnow]

Thank You...for being transparent in your beliefs..i completely agree with you.

I feel without an equally yoked mate...divorce is sure to follow.

Its sooo nice to see such a good man answer my question.

TY.

GBU

1. As long as it's something she enjoys doihg & doesn't degrade her in anyway im fine with it.
2. 50-50 I can cook for her & clean as well.
3. Raised with respect for others, thankful, not spoiled & taught the word
4. At least graduated high school, college isn't for everyone which I understand.
5. Doesn't have to be traditional just be herself
6. Be herself
7. Dress in what makes her feel comfortable & what she likes wearing
8. Yes shes allowed to disgree, I value her opinions
9. Yes shes allowed to have goals in which I will support her with

 

[GODisLOVE7]

What does being "Submissive" look like to men...who are either married...or looking for a wife???

In Regards to??-----

1. Employment?
2. Cooking? (Housekeeping)
3. Child Rearing?
4. Education?
5. Traditional? -- (in what way?)
6. How should a man behave at home behind closed doors?
7. How should your wife (or potential wife) dress and behave at home?
8. Is your wife (or potential) permitted to disagree and say no. (without being punished)
9. Is it okay for her to have goals and dreams that might be different than yours?

Just thought....i'd ask.

Thank you

GBU all....




Just curious to hear the responses!!!!

The questions listed focus on worldly aspects of life. For me, submission to Christ is on a whole other level.

First thing is to find a man who has truly submitted himself to Christ. Putting himself aside to gain more of Him.

Next, if a man is in submission to Christ, then the woman can submit to the man.

God is leading the entire time. That also means God will happily take care of all those details. He will direct both man and woman into the mechanics of life. Personally, I don't worry about what all the specifics look like, which also allows me freedom from having any kind of expectations.

If myself and my future husband focus on loving Him with all our heart, mind, and soul then the rest doesn't matter and will sort itself out as we move into His will, together. Yes, there will be bumps. But all the more reason to keep turning to Him for every step of the way.

Just my thoughts, but I'm no expert. I do know what I am looking for in a man though... Submission to Christ. Thats the only requirement!

Thanks for posting this thread. Its an interesting topic

And seoulsearch: Im sorry your other thread took a weird detour! Lolol!

 

[lv2ski]

IMO.....there's too much flattery on this thread....

If you're questioning God's direct commandment to wives then be very careful. Nowhere in the Word does it say IF the husband does this, then you do that. Nowhere! Life is a one on one with God regardless of what anyone does or does not do. Some arrangements are simply unfair. Sometimes things happen, people change and we say, "Oh I didn't sign up for this. " HAHA, Oh yes you did.... remember all that for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health and all that I do to "obey your husband. " stuffy wuffy?" Oh?! You omitted that part? God's Word didn't. But then ,if you believe submission to your husband is optional and conditional, then you would. In fact 1st Peter is a direct exhortation to wives who's husbands don't obey the Word.

The question really is.... is someone trying to find a loophole with the Lord, are they unhappy with the compromise they made and looking for a way out or an excuse to resist where there isn't any biblical grounds to do so.

Sex before marriage is how many women get married and are in their own"less than their own ideal situation. Be careful.... you just might get what you asked for! Put your faith first, not charm or sex appeal or chemistry.