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I'm new here and needed some advice and maybe to hear some of you guys testimonies! I will try to make this as short as possible, me and my ex boyfriend knew each other in first grade and had a crush on each other, he moved and found me on facebook in 2010. I inboxed him asking if he remembered me, just to start a conversation and he said he did and told me how he had this huge crush on me. We connected quick and he gave me his number and told me to contact him sometime. We were best friends ever since and started dating in 2013. By the way, he stays 2 hours from me. We recently broke up 3 months ago. 1 month after we broke up, I didn't talk to him but he had a heart attack and his sister asked me to contact him. It's like every time I try to let him go, something happens. We started talking again and I asked him to do my pictures for my birthday (he loves photography).. the week before he came to visit me to help me with props for my photoshoot, he contacted me everyday and I felt like we were going to do better. He came down and one night I got tipsy, for the 1st time and he kissed me. He asked if I missed him and I didn't say anything, he kept flirting and I flirted back. When he went home, he was distant. When he came back to do my pictures, we flirted again and he was distant when he went home, once again! I asked him about it and he finally told me that he was talking to someone and that they've been talking for about a month. She stays down there where he lives and he said she stood out to him because she knew how to give him space when he needed it and that she was fun to be around. I honestly think they won't last, because he moved on so fast and he always does that. I never noticed that until now... He said he was sorry and that he tried to see if we had something still when he came to visit, but he said he just wanted something better... We were a happy couple and great friends at one point, but things got so complicated. I believe God did bring him into my life, but a lot of things that we did and didn't do is probably why we ended. I've completely cut him off today and I was so hurt for the past few nights, but I feel better today. But I still have this deep feeling that things can work out. I'm scared to completely move on because I'm scared if he does come back into my life then I might be taking steps back. He in some ways led me closer to God but also took me away from God. And I let him without really knowing. We were sexually active, tried to stop a few times but it was hard. Distance was hurting us, my parents don't let me stay out past 11:30 and I can't spend the nights or go see him. I made him an idol without even knowing, I knew I put off praying sometimes for him and when we were going through something I ran right back to God. But he treated me right, we argued most of the time, but were happy most of the time as well. He told me we could be friends but I don't want to be friends because it hurts, if he wasn't talking to that new girl, I would've tried it. But I don't want to feel like a back up plan. He told me I wasn't and that he was going to leave me alone because he didn't want to hurt me anymore than he did.
I'm all for second chances in the future, but ONLY if God is completely with us this time and we allow Him to be in our friendship and relationship. I feel like my ex tried to do better, but he just doesn't know how to completely be better. Neither do I. I heard that men are supposed to lead in prayer and in our walk with Christ, but he couldn't do that. I bought him a Bible for a gift one time and highlighted things for him and he went out and bought me a book on how to understand the Bible better. He was trying! When I look back at everything, we both had our wrongs, but we both really did love each other, not in the best way that we should have, but we tried. We started dating when we were 17 and broke up when we were 21 (Still 21)... I'm just trying to give it all over to God and still pray for him to get closer to God and to find the right woman for his life in the right time. This new girl he talks to, nothing against her, but he didn't mention anything about her praying for him or trying to make sure he's on the right path. He's just talking to her because she's fun and closer to him. Every time I prayed for us in the past, things seemed to work out every time! But me and him both messed things up with our stubbornness and I had anger issues. I was so set on him getting close to God and rushing things and I wasn't checking myself. I pray now that if it is in God's will, that we will get a second chance to try us again with God FULLY involved, but at the same time, I pray for my future husband, whoever he may be. I really care about my ex, and as hard as it is to wish the best for him, I kind of don't want to see him with someone else. Because I want to be the one he grows with as a friend and/or partner. BUT, I know I have to let go and let God. It might hurt, but I do just want him to be happy. I just don't want him leaning on this new girl, instead of leaning on God. Idk if I should completely give up or what, because God is full of miracles, and maybe he's saving us for each other in the future. My ex said that we needed to find God and ourselves, but look how fast he moved on to someone else. It's just hard to deal with. But for now, I'm fine. Just have to keep praying about everything and keep my hardheaded self out of it and let God do what He does best!! Any advice? Please pray for me as well.. because I'm really stuck between having hope for us or just letting it all go.
I'm all for second chances in the future, but ONLY if God is completely with us this time and we allow Him to be in our friendship and relationship. I feel like my ex tried to do better, but he just doesn't know how to completely be better. Neither do I. I heard that men are supposed to lead in prayer and in our walk with Christ, but he couldn't do that. I bought him a Bible for a gift one time and highlighted things for him and he went out and bought me a book on how to understand the Bible better. He was trying! When I look back at everything, we both had our wrongs, but we both really did love each other, not in the best way that we should have, but we tried. We started dating when we were 17 and broke up when we were 21 (Still 21)... I'm just trying to give it all over to God and still pray for him to get closer to God and to find the right woman for his life in the right time. This new girl he talks to, nothing against her, but he didn't mention anything about her praying for him or trying to make sure he's on the right path. He's just talking to her because she's fun and closer to him. Every time I prayed for us in the past, things seemed to work out every time! But me and him both messed things up with our stubbornness and I had anger issues. I was so set on him getting close to God and rushing things and I wasn't checking myself. I pray now that if it is in God's will, that we will get a second chance to try us again with God FULLY involved, but at the same time, I pray for my future husband, whoever he may be. I really care about my ex, and as hard as it is to wish the best for him, I kind of don't want to see him with someone else. Because I want to be the one he grows with as a friend and/or partner. BUT, I know I have to let go and let God. It might hurt, but I do just want him to be happy. I just don't want him leaning on this new girl, instead of leaning on God. Idk if I should completely give up or what, because God is full of miracles, and maybe he's saving us for each other in the future. My ex said that we needed to find God and ourselves, but look how fast he moved on to someone else. It's just hard to deal with. But for now, I'm fine. Just have to keep praying about everything and keep my hardheaded self out of it and let God do what He does best!! Any advice? Please pray for me as well.. because I'm really stuck between having hope for us or just letting it all go.
