As many children as the STARS!

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TheLastKnight

TheLastKnight

Member
#1
Dec 17, 2016
95
5
8
#1
Father Abraham had many sons, he must have been really important. Many years I wonder why, Abraham was promised as many sons as the stars. I wonder this because, I feel old and I don't have many sons. I also think about that woman was made for man and that it is good for a man to not be alone. I hate the desires that plague my mind and my soul. It's misery. Then I wonder... Is there more for me? I wonder, If woman was created for man and man for woman... am I not a man? How unimportant must I be that nobody takes interest in me, I serve my purpose alone. I hate, I abhor the desire for companionship. It brings me misery. I hate when I see a woman or a couple. I hate seeing it on tv. I hate seeing it in person. A reminder of how I am a failure. I think I abused my last marriage and I don't have what it takes to be a worthy companion to anyone. Yet I am so glad that my ex wife is no longer in my life. I find hope that I don't have to deal with her knives in my throat anymore. I can find comfort in knowing that I don't have to wish for death everyday because of the misery that satanic woman caused me. Praise God he set me free from that. On second thought if I find another companion like that... it's not going to end well. Do I really want to put myself through that hell again? I would rather set myself on fire and burn alive. Oh, I'm so frustrated! I have one hope. Hope in God. Although, my days get me down. Why? I look forward to Jesus, to the Resurrection. I wonder will there be husbands and wives in the resurrection? Will there be the desire to have a wife and children then? Is companionship, marriage, intimacy and reproduction of new life constrained to this world? I hate this world. I love Gods creation though. Good job God.
 
J

JustWhoIAm

Guest
#2
#2
TheLastKnight said:
Father Abraham had many sons, he must have been really important. Many years I wonder why, Abraham was promised as many sons as the stars. I wonder this because, I feel old and I don't have many sons. I also think about that woman was made for man and that it is good for a man to not be alone. I hate the desires that plague my mind and my soul. It's misery. Then I wonder... Is there more for me? I wonder, If woman was created for man and man for woman... am I not a man? How unimportant must I be that nobody takes interest in me, I serve my purpose alone. I hate, I abhor the desire for companionship. It brings me misery. I hate when I see a woman or a couple. I hate seeing it on tv. I hate seeing it in person. A reminder of how I am a failure. I think I abused my last marriage and I don't have what it takes to be a worthy companion to anyone. Yet I am so glad that my ex wife is no longer in my life. I find hope that I don't have to deal with her knives in my throat anymore. I can find comfort in knowing that I don't have to wish for death everyday because of the misery that satanic woman caused me. Praise God he set me free from that. On second thought if I find another companion like that... it's not going to end well. Do I really want to put myself through that hell again? I would rather set myself on fire and burn alive. Oh, I'm so frustrated! I have one hope. Hope in God. Although, my days get me down. Why? I look forward to Jesus, to the Resurrection. I wonder will there be husbands and wives in the resurrection? Will there be the desire to have a wife and children then? Is companionship, marriage, intimacy and reproduction of new life constrained to this world? I hate this world. I love Gods creation though. Good job God.
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Prayers for you. May justice and mercy follow you.
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#3
Mar 26, 2014
4,328
2,361
113
#3
TheLastKnight said:
Father Abraham had many sons, he must have been really important. Many years I wonder why, Abraham was promised as many sons as the stars. I wonder this because, I feel old and I don't have many sons. I also think about that woman was made for man and that it is good for a man to not be alone. I hate the desires that plague my mind and my soul. It's misery. Then I wonder... Is there more for me? I wonder, If woman was created for man and man for woman... am I not a man? How unimportant must I be that nobody takes interest in me, I serve my purpose alone. I hate, I abhor the desire for companionship. It brings me misery. I hate when I see a woman or a couple. I hate seeing it on tv. I hate seeing it in person. A reminder of how I am a failure. I think I abused my last marriage and I don't have what it takes to be a worthy companion to anyone. Yet I am so glad that my ex wife is no longer in my life. I find hope that I don't have to deal with her knives in my throat anymore. I can find comfort in knowing that I don't have to wish for death everyday because of the misery that satanic woman caused me. Praise God he set me free from that. On second thought if I find another companion like that... it's not going to end well. Do I really want to put myself through that hell again? I would rather set myself on fire and burn alive. Oh, I'm so frustrated! I have one hope. Hope in God. Although, my days get me down. Why? I look forward to Jesus, to the Resurrection. I wonder will there be husbands and wives in the resurrection? Will there be the desire to have a wife and children then? Is companionship, marriage, intimacy and reproduction of new life constrained to this world? I hate this world. I love Gods creation though. Good job God.
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Well here's an encouraging thought, you might be in exactly the same place Abraham was at your age. We don't know how old he was when he married. We do know that he didn't receive the promise of descendants until he was 75. He'd probably given up on ever having children then as well, until God spoke. And even after that, there were times when he doubted, when he was sure it was impossible, and when it seemed like maybe God had forgotten (it was 25 years from the time he heard God's call until Isaac was born, that's a pretty long time to wait for someone to keep a promise).

We all long for connection and companionship, but romantic relationships aren't the be all end all of our worth, value, or happiness. You almost sound like after a bad relationship you don't dare actually pursue another relationship, but you can't stop wanting one at the same time. I've heard a good argument that, that's part of God's design. He wants us to connect and interact with one another, but especially in a world permeated by sin, we need something inbuilt in us to keep us reaching out, otherwise many of us will come to the cold logical conclusion that relationship and connecting with people just aren't worth it. And yeah, loneliness is crappy, but maybe just maybe those desires are there because there is something as good and as big as those desires dream of and God wants to motivate you to go for it when the time comes.
 
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