A Goat, A Chicken, or a Golf Club... Which One Would Get YOU Married?

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seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#21
May 23, 2009
14,943
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#21
Willie-T said:
A prospective husband would have to give me a written guarantee he would never send her back to us.
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maxwel said:
I'm just perusing the thread looking for the most economical offer....

and something with a warranty.
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I used to work for a major retailer that had a virtual "any time, for any reason" return policy that people took shameless advantage of.

Several "customers" would buy complete patio sets (furniture, accessories, grills), use them the entire summer, then return them in them in the fall, claiming they were "damaged." They'd get a full refund, then just come back at the beginning of spring and repeat the whole cycle all over again. :rolleyes:

I told my parents that I'm glad my adoption agency didn't come with that kind of "guarantee", or I think they would have switched me out for a more agreeable version years ago. :p
 
Fenner

Fenner

Senior Member
#22
Jan 26, 2013
7,507
111
0
#22
I'm married but my Mom would have liked a bottle of Chardonnay and maybe lasik surgery.
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#23
#23
Willie-T said:
A prospective husband would have to give me a written guarantee he would never send her back to us.
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That's what his family told me, lol. They had a no return policy.
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#24
#24
seoulsearch said:
It depends.

I'm pretty sure the next question is going to be, "What kind of beer?" :p
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Don't remember took his underage little brother to help me pick it out. Might have gotten us both in trouble if his aunt wasn't working the cash register and believed me when I said I was buying it for his dad.
 
bingbing

bingbing

Banned
#25
Jan 13, 2017
157
2
0
#25
I came in wrong. I did everything to correct it. But, it's day 7.

Either in CC or in facebook, there will always be two kinds of person. One who does and one who don't. No wonder, Jesus was crucified with two robbers. One who does and one who don't. I am bipolar, I could be in my manic state because I feel too smart.
 
maxwel

maxwel

Senior Member
#26
Apr 18, 2013
9,339
2,427
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#26
bingbing said:
I came in wrong. I did everything to correct it. But, it's day 7.

Either in CC or in facebook, there will always be two kinds of person. One who does and one who don't. No wonder, Jesus was crucified with two robbers. One who does and one who don't. I am bipolar, I could be in my manic state because I feel too smart.
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I'm still waiting for the day I'll feel smart.

But I'm an optimist...

I'm willing to wait it out.
 
posthuman

posthuman

Senior Member
#27
Jul 31, 2013
36,661
13,127
113
#27
maxwel said:
I'm still waiting for the day I'll feel smart.

But I'm an optimist...

I'm willing to wait it out.
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meanwhile we try not to do anything dumb while we wait, right?

a sample on a song i know says,

"anytime i'm about to do something, i ask myself:
​
would an idiot do that? ​
and if the answer is yes, i do not do that thing." ​
 
cinder

cinder

Senior Member
#28
Mar 26, 2014
4,328
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#28
Let's see, my brother would want his first plane trip out of the country ( and it might be worth it to him just for the shock of seeing me actually have a boyfriend), Mom would also be happy with the opportunity to travel and if the guy came and played some games or cards with her, Dad probably wants an interview where the guy proves that he is the most exceptional of exceptional men (and has a sense of humor that can keep up with mine (and Dad's)). Yep my Dad has my back, that's for sure.
 
bingbing

bingbing

Banned
#30
Jan 13, 2017
157
2
0
#30
I'm still waiting for the day I'll feel smart.

But I'm an optimist...

I'm willing to wait it out.​



  • I have faith. Where is yours, Maxwell?

 
bingbing

bingbing

Banned
#31
Jan 13, 2017
157
2
0
#31
Second chance:

My parents will not ask him a cent, nor a dollar but would expect him to provide a grand wedding. I would object, though, and will want a simple wedding. That is, if he will listen.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#32
Aug 13, 2014
24,911
8,163
113
#32
Tinkerbell725 said:
Tiny bantam chickens are really cute and adorable. :)
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And they put out tiny eggs that are worthless for hard-boiling because they are less than a bite... but they have a much higher yolk/white ratio so I use them in chocolate pudding. Yum!
 
Pipp

Pipp

Majestic Llamacorn
#33
Sep 17, 2013
5,536
2,702
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Georgia
#33
Pickles... my dad likes pickles. Give him a few jars and I'm pretty sure he'd stick a stamp on my forehead and put me in the mail himself.
 
Y

Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#34
#34
Y'all women folk have dowry prices that are too rich for my meager earning potential. I guess I'll just stay single...shucks...lol.
 
88

88

Senior Member
#35
Nov 14, 2016
3,517
77
48
#35
Yahweh_is_gracious said:
Y'all women folk have dowry prices that are too rich for my meager earning potential. I guess I'll just stay single...shucks...lol.
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**** try negotiating---- you might get a good women for a dog and a horse...
 
Y

Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#36
#36
88 said:
**** try negotiating---- you might get a good women for a dog and a horse...
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Now you're just being silly. Ain't no woman on this Earth better than a good dog or a good horse.
 
D

DCrawshawJr

Guest
#38
#38
cinder said:
Let's see, my brother would want his first plane trip out of the country ( and it might be worth it to him just for the shock of seeing me actually have a boyfriend), Mom would also be happy with the opportunity to travel and if the guy came and played some games or cards with her, Dad probably wants an interview where the guy proves that he is the most exceptional of exceptional men (and has a sense of humor that can keep up with mine (and Dad's)). Yep my Dad has my back, that's for sure.
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I would relish the opportunity to be interviewed in this manner. Unfortunately, I don't quite have the cash for traveling (I wish I did, I'd like to do some traveling!).
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#39
Jun 30, 2015
24,685
13,376
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#39
A young women was on her way home late one morning, and she passed an older woman she knew. The elder politely asked her, "Where have you been, and what do you have in your hand?"

The young woman answered, "I've been to the market, where I got a blanket for my husband."

The elder pondered for a moment, and then stated resolutely, "Good trade."
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#40
Aug 2, 2009
24,580
4,268
113
#40
bingbing said:
Even nothing. My family is very willing to send me out! ASAP!:D (It's a joke but slightly true.)
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Same here. My family would just be ecstatic that a woman's actually interested in me. :rolleyes:
 
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