I felt it is hard to get a Christian girl out!

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S

Senjamin

Guest
#1
#1
I am from China but I am living in Canada now. In 2015, I got saved and baptised. I knew believers should get marriage not with unbeliever. However, I am in the local church and everyone is Canadian but not me. I felt very hard to ask a girl out I dont know why, maybe because we dont have same cultural background. What do you think guys??
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#2
#2
welp...

i havent been able to ask a girl out sucessfully in abouuuut 13 years?


but a few approached me sin then...


the last time i tried to ask a girl out it went like

this


almost two years ago*

i work in a factory with mainly spanish speaking people
and even though im puerto rican my spanish is terrible


well a new girl started workin at my plant
and someone came up to me and told me they think she likes me a few days after she started

i didnt pay what he said much attention
then within a week or two i had multiple people (who speak spanish and english) mention to me i should speak,with her i started paying more attention

and she did look my way and smile a lot
sooo i started gettin in my head a little bit about it

i knew she only spoke spanish
so i looked up on google translate how to say somethin along the lines of "hey, im jaime.. i noticed you lookin my way a lot lately and wanted to say you have a very pretty smile.... are you single?"

well after i practiced it a couple times i started to walk her way with a bunch of confidence totally ready for anything

but my factory is kinda big and she looked my way as i approached and i started messing it up in my head

by the time i made it to her and gave my best attempt at spanish*

what came out was along the lines of "good afternoon my name is jaime i see my smile is very pretty *gibberish in any language for a second* single?"


we awkwardly stared at eachother for a bit in silence

went back to my machine, pulled my phone out
saw how bad i messed up and that she wasnt bein a jerk

theeen i never spoke to her again
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#3
#3
i mean...


that wasnt REALLY asking her out...

but long story short

ya

its tough


and even tougher finding a good woman worth asking out


i accept God may just have me be single
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#4
#4
Sounds like you are nervous but me too. I tried to ask her out and she said sure, we set up everything and just wait for that moment. She said she got a call from her work then she canceled it. That's fine, I think. However, I tried several times after that, she always busy though. Very frustrated. I thought she may not like me even we often have a good conversations.
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#5
#5
Senjamin said:
Sounds like you are nervous but me too. I tried to ask her out and she said sure, we set up everything and just wait for that moment. She said she got a call from her work then she canceled it. That's fine, I think. However, I tried several times after that, she always busy though. Very frustrated. I thought she may not like me even we often have a good conversations.
Click to expand...
ill pray for you man

i cant offer advice seeing as i have no experience in courting since ive learned of Jesus

any advice i can offer from experience is worldly

i also dont know of any scriptures on this

ive read the bible
and read it daily

but i forget as much as i remember
 
N

NoNameMcgee

Guest
#6
#6
maybe shes nervous too?
 
C

CaptainGoat

Guest
#7
#7
Well. Leave that girl and look for another. If she likes you she will find the time to date you.
I remember when I was around my late 20's and a retired couple who were friends (Recently retired couple) suggested I would be ideal for a certain lady in the church. They gave me her phone number. She seemed to want to go out with me so I asked when we could go out. The problem is that she put the church as more important then dating. She wouldn't date on a Sunday. No worries. Wednesday was women's meeting. Thursday was a meeting. The other days she did quoir practice and daytimes she was working. I went day by day with her and after she recalled every day was fully booked for the first two weeks I didn't push her further and thought that if she put the church before a date then she wasn't going to find a man.

A good 10 years later on another Christian site I'm on a chatter said he was going to find a wife. He suggested I would join him on a free Christian dating site. Cautiously I joined and the lady from church was on it! Sadly I was not suprized!
I only stayed on the site a couple of weeks and I left as I messaged one or two ladies (As it was supposed to have a friendly chat side of it) and no one had the courtesy to replay. Seemed like the site was full of people who wouldn't talk to each other!

So my advice is to look elsewhere and if she is interested she will suddenly realize and make time.
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#8
#8
Yes, thats what I am thinking. You know what, before this girl, I asked another one. She rejected me and I heard from a Sister in the church, she wanted to be single. But I thanked her because her thoughts is frankly and clear. We still are good friends now even I felt embrassing after rejection couple week ago.
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#9
#9
I am not sure what is she thinking but if I were her, I will be frankly to react to any invitation. And I will try to avoid hurting anyone because we learned love from the Bible.
 
G

Galatea

Guest
#10
#10
Hey, I saw a program about the fastest growing churches in the US. Guess what? They were Chinese Christian churches. I suspect the same might be true in Canada. Why not look around and see if there is a local Chinese congregation? That way, there will be no language barrier. I know people from two cultures can fall in love, but it is much harder if they don't speak the same language. Anyway, this is my advice, for what it's worth.
 
I

imfinallyfree

Banned
#11
Dec 17, 2013
822
7
0
#11
You mentioned that believers should not marry non believers? If that is how you really feel then that is great but you are really limiting your resources because there a many non believers that are inherently good people that just dont understand God yet.

Maybe if you became friends with a non believer you can help them learn about God.

My ma is a Christian that married a muslim and even though he kept trying to convert her they still had a good happy marriage.
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#12
Jun 30, 2015
24,685
13,376
113
#12
imfinallyfree said:
You mentioned that believers should not marry non believers? If that is how you really feel then that is great but you are really limiting your resources because there a many non believers that are inherently good people that just dont understand God yet.

Maybe if you became friends with a non believer you can help them learn about God.

My ma is a Christian that married a muslim and even though he kept trying to convert her they still had a good happy marriage.
Click to expand...
I cannot disagree more. Not only is marrying an unbeliever contrary to clear scriptural teaching, it is foolish. Of course there are examples of multi-faith marriages that "work"... and there are also happy atheists. How could you make important decisions when you don't share the same basis for truth?

Let's use your example for discussion: Christian and Moslem marry each other. The Moslem insists on giving their required monetary contribution to the mosque. The Christian sees that as supporting a falsehood, and can't condone it. Likewise, the Moslem can't condone their spouse supporting what they see as an infidel religion. Overlooking those things is just cognitive dissonance, not tolerance.

What fellowship has light with darkness? If you're looking for a spouse, let the unbeliever go! (but pray for them and witness to them).
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#13
#13
I met some Chinese Christians before but I found we do not have the same topics. I don't know maybe because I stayed here for long time, maybe I like local people. And the most important thing, I found I am not typical Chinese any more. I accepted lots of local people's ideas.
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#14
#14
2 Corinthians 6:14-16
14 Do not be [a]bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? 15 Or what harmony has Christ with [b]Belial, or [c]what has abeliever in common with an unbeliever? 16 Or what agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said,
“I will dwell in them and walk among them;
And I will be their God, and they shall be My people.
 
S

Senjamin

Guest
#15
#15
You right, I agree.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
I

Infusion

Guest
#18
#18
I know what you mean. I am living in a place that I dont fit in either. And it does make it seem impossible to talk to girls. I looked for a girl more like me. But whats funny is I ended up with a girl from another culture thats not mine or the one where I live but we have so much in common anyway.
 
T

Tabitha4thelord

Guest
#19
#19
NoNameMcgee said:
welp...

i havent been able to ask a girl out sucessfully in abouuuut 13 years?


but a few approached me sin then...


the last time i tried to ask a girl out it went like

this


almost two years ago*

i work in a factory with mainly spanish speaking people
and even though im puerto rican my spanish is terrible


well a new girl started workin at my plant
and someone came up to me and told me they think she likes me a few days after she started

i didnt pay what he said much attention
then within a week or two i had multiple people (who speak spanish and english) mention to me i should speak,with her i started paying more attention

and she did look my way and smile a lot
sooo i started gettin in my head a little bit about it

i knew she only spoke spanish
so i looked up on google translate how to say somethin along the lines of "hey, im jaime.. i noticed you lookin my way a lot lately and wanted to say you have a very pretty smile.... are you single?"

well after i practiced it a couple times i started to walk her way with a bunch of confidence totally ready for anything

but my factory is kinda big and she looked my way as i approached and i started messing it up in my head

by the time i made it to her and gave my best attempt at spanish*

what came out was along the lines of "good afternoon my name is jaime i see my smile is very pretty *gibberish in any language for a second* single?"


we awkwardly stared at eachother for a bit in silence

went back to my machine, pulled my phone out
saw how bad i messed up and that she wasnt bein a jerk

theeen i never spoke to her again
Click to expand...
Awww, This makes me so sad :(
 
I

imfinallyfree

Banned
#20
Dec 17, 2013
822
7
0
#20
Dino246 said:
I cannot disagree more. Not only is marrying an unbeliever contrary to clear scriptural teaching, it is foolish. Of course there are examples of multi-faith marriages that "work"... and there are also happy atheists. How could you make important decisions when you don't share the same basis for truth?

Let's use your example for discussion: Christian and Moslem marry each other. The Moslem insists on giving their required monetary contribution to the mosque. The Christian sees that as supporting a falsehood, and can't condone it. Likewise, the Moslem can't condone their spouse supporting what they see as an infidel religion. Overlooking those things is just cognitive dissonance, not tolerance.

What fellowship has light with darkness? If you're looking for a spouse, let the unbeliever go! (but pray for them and witness to them).
Click to expand...
No.....choosing gang affiliation which is all that religions are (gangs) over love is absolutely wrong.

God doesn't want us bickering and fighting over ideals, He wants us to be decent and caring to each other.

You sir are nothing but a gang banger.
 
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