8 years a go i had got married with my exhusband,after entered into the marriage , i realized that he was not really beliver-he never went to church except when i asked to,and he beared no fruit .but he claimed he blieved jesus. and he has been used to gambling. in order to help him to give up his gambling,i quited my job to accompany him, but unluckily,he did not want to change it but he was additced to it and the situation got worse. even he got loan from banks and companys. so that i have to find job to help him to pay off his debt. because he alway said he was sorry for that everytime he needed help from me. it's really hard for me and child during the years ,finally we got divored . recently he came to find me to say that he wants to reunit with me. can i reunt with my exhusband ? i know we are in different dirction ,he still persuit somthing from the world while i want to be in god.so i think i should say "NO" to him. but the verse in bible says one woman who got divorced should be united with his exhusband. so i am in a loss, i really don't want to go back to the past life with my kid ,it's really not what i want .i am right? any advice?
can i reunit with my exhusband?
- Thread starter changfeng
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Don't go back. You left him because of the horrible situation he put you and your family in. Now that he wants you back, to have someone to pay for his gambling and debts you're going to even consider it? If you want to go into debt, live in stress and frustration all the while setting a bad example for your children and one day divorce him again, then sure, go back. But if you want to have a productive, Godly life with a future, then say no.
pray about it go on a fast and seek the lord with all your heart , if he wants to summit to the lord Jesus Christ then give it a chance the enemy doesn't want a marriage to be together because you become one flesh , 2 is better then 1 and you are a part of him and when the marriage is together you become a force with Jesus christ at the head , if he wants to reunite let him know if your aRe willing to give your life to Jesus christ , he feels bad he seems guilty and maybe repentive , ill suggest pray about it and fast (FASTING) is key abstain for food and pray to God humble yourself go on a 3 day fast and pray about your situation to God , after have a conversation with your husband when your spirit led and let him know you want your marriage centered o christ to obey the lords commands
God can restore what is broken and change it into something amazing, All you need is faith. — Joel 2:25
[FONT="]Matthew 7:7[/FONT][h=3]Ask, Seek, Knock[/h][FONT="]7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.[/FONT]brothers, thanks for sharing your ideas!!! for this thing i prayed for many times, i know what he needs and what i need in our heart, once in a while , i hoped that he could come back .but every time he let me down. sometimes he could do good deeds if he needed my help. i really don't want to go back to the life like that, only put myself to the hand of lord whatever it cost.only what i worried about is the verse in bible . sometimes that verse will accuse me , which discourage me.
dont be discourage put your trust in the lord keep praying for the lord to deliver him if it is Gods will , he will reconcile you back fasting makes your prayer more powerfull the lord sees your humbling yourself before him and denying your self if it is Gods will he will make it happen keep praying keep knocking he will answer in the meantime keep praying also for his deliverance so the lord can open up his eyes and ear and that he might see truth and be delivered from this world hope it goes well for you
may the lords will be done in Jesus name amen
may the lords will be done in Jesus name amen
Hi changfeng,
It appears that that scriptures give you two options.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.
Scripturally speaking, do you see that you are fine to remain unmarried?
It appears that that scriptures give you two options.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband (but if she does leave, she must remain unmarried, or else be reconciled to her husband), and that the husband should not divorce his wife.
Scripturally speaking, do you see that you are fine to remain unmarried?
In the Bible it says a woman should not divorce her husband and if she does she should remain without a husband for the rest of her life if she is older. What if a woman had to divorce her husband to save herself from his addictions and violence? Why should a woman be left alone for the rest of her life for something that was not her choice?
There are a couple of verses that I believe are being referenced in this question and a few others that we need to consider that also apply. The reference to an older woman not getting remarried is found in 1 Timothy 5:9-15. Paul is not speaking about divorce in this case but actually about widows. Financial support of widows and orphans was a crucial ministry in the early church. They were nearly totally dependent on fellow believers since employment was not an option. In order to manage this well, the church would have a list of widows who were eligible for support. Paul says that younger widows should not be put in the list as they will in all likelihood remarry quickly. Older widows, and by that he says, sixty and older, should not worry about getting remarried and the church should put them on the list for support. This served two functions. First, it meant that a young woman who could easily get married and be supported, would not end up permanently being supported by the church for the next 40 years. Second, it took pressure off older women to find a husband at their age and receive the support of the church.
This still leaves the whole question of a divorced person, man or woman, being able to get married again. There are several passages that need to be taken together in order to get a complete picture on what the Bible teaches. In the Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 5:31,32, Jesus makes it clear that if a spouse is guilty of sexual infidelity then the offended spouse is free to divorce. That freedom to divorce carries with it the freedom to remarry. Some have tried to say that they may be free to divorce but not to remarry. They contend Jesus didn’t say that they could remarry. In the Jewish culture in which Jesus spoke, the whole reason for a divorce was to be able to remarry. The certificate of divorce that He mentions was what gave a person the freedom to remarry.
Paul deals with another example in which divorce is allowed and the believer in Jesus is free to remarry. In 1 Corinthians 7:12-15, Paul says that if a believer is married to an unbeliever and the unbeliever wants a divorce then you are to let them leave. You are not bound to that relationship any longer, but in fact free. That freedom is understood as the freedom to remarry. The principle here is carried further in that if a believing spouse opts for divorce and refuses to stay in the marriage, then you are free to remarry. You cannot be bound to one who refuses the relationship and leaves. They have initiated the divorce and in the current law in most if not all states, there is not much one can do to stop that. In such a case, many would apply the principle of 1 Corinthians 7 and give the innocent spouse the freedom to remarry.
The Bible does not directly speak to the issue of violence against a spouse but most Christian Ethicists today consider that to be paramount to sexual infidelity and that freedom to divorce and remarry would follow. The reason for this is that such physical violence, when looked at in light of Ephesians 5, would be a heinous violation of the marriage covenant. A husband is to lay down his life for his bride as Christ did for the church. Clearly he is not to harm that body. Caring for ones wife is compared to carrying for ones own body. It should also be noted that we are speaking of physical abuse and not verbal. Although verbal abuse is a serious issue, it is not a biblical reason for divorce.
With all of that said we need to be clear that God’s desire is that there be no divorce and that we model a covenant relationship in marriage that parallels the faithfulness and eternal nature of our relationship with Him. We need to work much harder than many do today, in order to do all we can to not only keep a marriage together but to make it thrive. Jesus said that the Law of Moses allowed for divorce because of our sinful hearts. We are just not always willing to work at it as we should. What God, through Moses, intended to do was manage a bad situation as best as possible. We must also remember that divorce is not the unforgivable sin. If someone is remarried and there was nothing even close to a biblical reason for the divorce, then a recognition of that wrong and an asking forgiveness is called for. What is not called for is another divorce from the second marriage. Working to be the most God honoring couple in that marriage should be the goal.
Dr. Dan Lacich
Pastor for Distributed Sites
www.provocativechristian.com
