What Would You Do?
- Thread starter Lighthearted
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If you think it's worth it, express yourself. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. I remember a Thai movie. The title is maybe " I love you" , i'm not so sure. The guy who is a playboy throws away the word I love you all the time like it means nothing. But when the time came that it was for real, he was cursed and he could'nt say the word I love you. He was dying to say those words, but he could'nt. It feels so good to say those words and you struggle because you have to express it,specially if you mean it.
Suppose you find yourself with this special person and all is good but you both decide that there are little ducks that must be lined up before you continue moving forward in your relationship...how do you both put your affections on a back burner and attempt to make them as non-existent as you can for the time being?
I think it would depend upon what the ducks are and why you have to have a non-existent relationship until they are lined up.
I mean, if the dude is already married or in a relationship with someone else then I'd just walk. But like I said I don't know what the issues are...that's just the only reason I can think of for having to conceal a relationship or have a non-existent relationship with someone...but that may not be the case at all. Just seems a little strange to me that things would need to be lined up before you could show affection for someone else...Just my opinion, though.
I mean, if the dude is already married or in a relationship with someone else then I'd just walk. But like I said I don't know what the issues are...that's just the only reason I can think of for having to conceal a relationship or have a non-existent relationship with someone...but that may not be the case at all. Just seems a little strange to me that things would need to be lined up before you could show affection for someone else...Just my opinion, though.
This sounds like a job for.... Self-Control! To deal with "affections" which are inappropriate at this stage, set boundaries for yourself and your special person. Don't put yourself in situations where you will struggle. Limit your time alone together, and choose to focus your attentions elsewhere rather than imagining or fantasizing.
Prayerfully consider whether the relationship is within the parameters which God has established, and of course whether this specific relationship is His will for you. If there are restricting factors, that may be an indication that it's not His will.
Another thing I would encourage (for anyone, not just you) is establish and maintain open communication with an accountability partner... in this case, a more mature Christian female would be a good choice. Solicit that person's input and prayer support, and don't take their input lightly.
Prayerfully consider whether the relationship is within the parameters which God has established, and of course whether this specific relationship is His will for you. If there are restricting factors, that may be an indication that it's not His will.
Another thing I would encourage (for anyone, not just you) is establish and maintain open communication with an accountability partner... in this case, a more mature Christian female would be a good choice. Solicit that person's input and prayer support, and don't take their input lightly.
Pray since love is not boastful nor insist on its own way. Pray for Jesus to work the fruits of the Spirit of patience and longsuffering and temperance which is self control.
1 Corinthians 13:[SUP]4 [/SUP]Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,[SUP] 5 [/SUP]Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;[SUP] 6 [/SUP]Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;[SUP]7 [/SUP]Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
I do not know if affections is the correct word you are using here, but the scripture does say we are to crucify that as well and not just lust.
Galatians 5:[SUP]19 [/SUP]Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,[SUP]20 [/SUP]Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,[SUP] 21 [/SUP]Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.[SUP] 22 [/SUP]But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,[SUP] 23 [/SUP]Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.[SUP] 24 [/SUP]And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.[SUP]25 [/SUP]If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
I know. Makes one feel like saying.. "What?!! I am not an Vulcan!!!"
I rely on Jesus to love others as He would enable us to love since the fruits of the Spirit are from Him.
Philippians 1:[SUP]6 [/SUP]Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:....[SUP]11 [/SUP]Being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ, unto the glory and praise of God.
I know that in my imagination, I sometime imagine myself in Heaven in my zealous love towards someone in pouncing on that person like Tigger does in Winnie the Pooh in greeting her in Heaven I trust Jesus to perfect that which concerneth me, because I am sure I am being childish as well as unrealistic in my imagination. Try doing that to Jesus in Heaven. Not.
I may be wrong. Maybe we are allowed to greet Jesus and everybody else that way in Heaven wherein nobody could get hurt and it would be funny as well as fun, but I know better to do some cartoonish move on a real person down here. Ouch.
1 Corinthians 13:[SUP]9 [/SUP]For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.[SUP] 10 [/SUP]But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.[SUP] 11 [/SUP]When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.[SUP]12 [/SUP]For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.[SUP]13 [/SUP]And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
1 Corinthians 13:[SUP]4 [/SUP]Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,[SUP] 5 [/SUP]Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;[SUP] 6 [/SUP]Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;[SUP]7 [/SUP]Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
I do not know if affections is the correct word you are using here, but the scripture does say we are to crucify that as well and not just lust.
Galatians 5:[SUP]19 [/SUP]Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,[SUP]20 [/SUP]Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,[SUP] 21 [/SUP]Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.[SUP] 22 [/SUP]But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,[SUP] 23 [/SUP]Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.[SUP] 24 [/SUP]And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.[SUP]25 [/SUP]If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.
I know. Makes one feel like saying.. "What?!! I am not an Vulcan!!!"
I rely on Jesus to love others as He would enable us to love since the fruits of the Spirit are from Him.
Philippians 1:[SUP]6 [/SUP]Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:....[SUP]11 [/SUP]Being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ, unto the glory and praise of God.
I know that in my imagination, I sometime imagine myself in Heaven in my zealous love towards someone in pouncing on that person like Tigger does in Winnie the Pooh in greeting her in Heaven I trust Jesus to perfect that which concerneth me, because I am sure I am being childish as well as unrealistic in my imagination. Try doing that to Jesus in Heaven. Not.
I may be wrong. Maybe we are allowed to greet Jesus and everybody else that way in Heaven wherein nobody could get hurt and it would be funny as well as fun, but I know better to do some cartoonish move on a real person down here. Ouch.
1 Corinthians 13:[SUP]9 [/SUP]For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.[SUP] 10 [/SUP]But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.[SUP] 11 [/SUP]When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.[SUP]12 [/SUP]For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.[SUP]13 [/SUP]And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.