Is singleness a gift?

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Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
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#21
Quote for the day: "If singleness is a gift, can I put it in layaway or take it to the service desk and return it?"

I don't remember who said it, but it was in a "is being single a gift?" thread long ago.
 

Innerfire89

Senior Member
Aug 23, 2017
586
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#22
It's a default and the absence of a spouse. But the freedom to go about certain things could considered a gift I guess.

Eve was God's gift to Adam.
 
Aug 2, 2009
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#23
I think Paul really should not have used the word "gift"...

..because what he really meant was that being single is simply an advantage to someone who wants to devote all their attention to serving Christ (instead of having to divide their attention between Christ and a spouse)...

He did not mean that it would be all pretty and wrapped up with pink bow.. :rolleyes:

 
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MollyConnor

Guest
#24
More like a curse! lol
I was somewhat joking on this post. I mean yeah it's stressful when you want to have a family and you're almost 30 like I said earlier. But if I'm single, it means that God wants it to be that way for now. If I stay single forever, then so be it. I've got to learn to trust God and his will. Maybe there isn't a guy out there for me. I would rather be single than married to the wrong one. ;)
 

mar09

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2014
4,927
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#25
I think what we hv now is gifts from our Lord Jesus.
Life is a gift. Being single or not are also gift that He gives us to choose.
Thats why we must be greatful for what we hv n respect it.
Enjoy your single status or your marry or having someone specials by doing it you can find your own happiness :)

Blessing amen
Helo, garet. I was a rather serious person growing up, but have learned to enjoy life more, esp after i recovered from depression. Not that i claim to know that much to teach on singleness, but i happen to be reading a book on godliness/holiness for women, and want to share from a chapter on singleness. Many are familiar w/ 1 Cor. 7.17:

1 Corinthians 7:17 And don't be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God's place for you... (MSG)

Barbara Hughes wrote: "We see God in a military sense assigning us to report for duty, then gently beckoning us to minister alongside Him-- all in regard to our marital status... Your married status is not an accident, God planned it."

So much in our cultures tend to push the idea that sex and romance are the ultimate pursuits. Many are given the msg that singleness is "something to be fixed." But 1 Cor. 7.40 also declares it is better to be single than married, according to the author who says we see in God's Word to see the single life as an assignment, a calling, and a gift.

NT attitude toward being single is very positive... When the disciples said in Mt. 19.10 "If this is the situation bet. a husband and wife, it is better not to marry." Jesus did not disagree, and said "Not everyone can accept these words, but only those for whom it has been given..." (Mat. 19.11-12)... "Gift often implies a special favor by God. The favor of singleness means God has bestowed dignity and honor to a position that had formerly been regarded as less desirable...Singleness isnt always a permament status... The capstone verse where Jesus says "Everyone should retain..." may sound unpleasant, for obedience often feels that way initially." But His commands are not burdensome for those who love God. -- Disciplines of a Godly Woman


 
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garet82

Senior Member
Jan 20, 2011
679
85
28
#26
Helo, garet. I was a rather serious person growing up, but have learned to enjoy life more, esp after i recovered from depression. Not that i claim to know that much to teach on singleness, but i happen to be reading a book on godliness/holiness for women, and want to share from a chapter on singleness. Many are familiar w/ 1 Cor. 7.17:

1 Corinthians 7:17 And don't be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God's place for you... (MSG)

Barbara Hughes wrote: "We see God in a military sense assigning us to report for duty, then gently beckoning us to minister alongside Him-- all in regard to our marital status... Your married status is not an accident, God planned it."

So much in our cultures tend to push the idea that sex and romance are the ultimate pursuits. Many are given the msg that singleness is "something to be fixed." But 1 Cor. 7.40 also declares it is better to be single than married, according to the author who says we see in God's Word to see the single life as an assignment, a calling, and a gift.

NT attitude toward being single is very positive... When the disciples said in Mt. 19.10 "If this is the situation bet. a husband and wife, it is better not to marry." Jesus did not disagree, and said "Not everyone can accept these words, but only those for whom it has been given..." (Mat. 19.11-12)... "Gift often implies a special favor by God. The favor of singleness means God has bestowed dignity and honor to a position that had formerly been regarded as less desirable...Singleness isnt always a permament status... The capstone verse where Jesus says "Everyone should retain..." may sound unpleasant, for obedience often feels that way initially." But His commands are not burdensome for those who love God. -- Disciplines of a Godly Woman


Amen :)
Thank you for sharing the lovely scriptures for me :)
Blessing amen
 
M

Mooky

Guest
#27
Gift? A resounding yes.As long as you have good platonic relationships in your life, purpose and a loving cat - life is good.I have seen too many women in my family get the short end of the stick and also have to deal with horrible in laws ( when you marry someone - you also marry their family.) to covet marriage.
Life is too short to be hung up on marriage and although it sometimes causes angst to think about this , I like to think about the dot and line analogy.The dot being our temporal earthly lives and the line being our lives that stretch on for eternity.
Risking your happiness and potential usefulness in Gods kingdom on someone who could mess that all up is quite a risk.So while I am not anti-marriage per se, I think one requires a great amount of prayer and circumspection before taking the plunge.
 
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Galatea

Guest
#28
No, it is not a gift in my opinion. It is abnormal and lonely. Single people are (1) more depressed (2) live shorter lives (3) have less sex (even single people who are sexually active have less sex on average than married people).

I think the lows are definitely worth it because the highs are so high. Married people fight, hurt each other, and one day one will die before the other. But there is nothing that can replace what it means to be one with another, nothing.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#29
Depends of your perspective. Regardless, I would not consider it a gift but merely a matter of present circumstances.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#30
No, it is not a gift in my opinion. It is abnormal and lonely. Single people are (1) more depressed (2) live shorter lives (3) have less sex (even single people who are sexually active have less sex on average than married people).

I think the lows are definitely worth it because the highs are so high. Married people fight, hurt each other, and one day one will die before the other. But there is nothing that can replace what it means to be one with another, nothing.
I fully concur with your post. It is a good thing being married to your best friend. A couple whose marriage is centered on God will tend to have less fights that hurt each other. You are right in saying that the one will die before the other. I know this from first hand experience but have no regrets. To death do we part.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
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#31
I was somewhat joking on this post. I mean yeah it's stressful when you want to have a family and you're almost 30 like I said earlier. But if I'm single, it means that God wants it to be that way for now. If I stay single forever, then so be it. I've got to learn to trust God and his will. Maybe there isn't a guy out there for me. I would rather be single than married to the wrong one. ;)
There is certainly a guy out there for you. And there's a woman out there for him. Somewhere, out there.
 
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Galatea

Guest
#32
I fully concur with your post. It is a good thing being married to your best friend. A couple whose marriage is centered on God will tend to have less fights that hurt each other. You are right in saying that the one will die before the other. I know this from first hand experience but have no regrets. To death do we part.
My grandfather and grandmother were married 49 years before she died. It was very painful to watch my grandfather grieve, and I remember watching them as I was growing. They did not have a perfect marriage, but loved each other dearly and the fights, misunderstandings, and grief were worth it for the love.

People always say that they would have kids all over again, even if their kids give them grief- or God forbid, die. I think the same is true with marriage.
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
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#33
I mean, I guess I now have a lot of ME time and a lot of GOD time... if I had a spouse I would have to sacrifice for them. Right now, I'm just sacrificing more for God. So, is it a gift? Maybe not now, but I might get a bigger heavenly reward from the results of it. :)
Why would you get a heavenly reward for a gift given to you by God?
 

Solemateleft

Honor, Courage, Commitment
Jun 25, 2017
12,000
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#34
Everyone is different, and everyone has different experiences, callings and desires. I have tremendous admiration for those who have a calling to provide so much of themselves to the lord our God above all others and on behalf of their flock...
Personally, I am a hopeless romantic and crave a life-long companionship with my soul-mate...
I pray that the lord shall bless me with such a cherished and deserving gift.
My gift to my life-partner is to vow to give 'all of me' to love all of her (to make her feel special, appreciated and wanted) - all the days of my life...
I pray to grow old with my companion, and I pray to be able to be by her side when she has her last breath and her soul returns home to Jesus...
 

Tommy379

Notorious Member
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
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#35
It's a curse. A curse of loneliness.
 
Y

Yahweh_is_gracious

Guest
#36
Sometimes I envy those of you who believe that you'll find the right person, and I hope you're right.
 

Born_Again

Senior Member
Nov 15, 2014
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#37
I've found singleness to be a splendid thing!!
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
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#38
No, it is not a gift in my opinion. It is abnormal and lonely. Single people are (1) more depressed (2) live shorter lives (3) have less sex (even single people who are sexually active have less sex on average than married people).

I think the lows are definitely worth it because the highs are so high. Married people fight, hurt each other, and one day one will die before the other. But there is nothing that can replace what it means to be one with another, nothing.
I am abnormal? I am lonely? I am depressed? I'm going to live a shorter life because I'm single?

Really?

(I can't argue with the part about having less sex - you can't get less than zero - but sex does not a life fulfill.) :rolleyes:

Galatea I get that you're single and hating it, but don't project your unhappiness on ALL singles. Some people are happy and single. Yeah, it's a real thing.

Do I not exist? I'm single, been single all my life, and I am neither lonely nor depressed. Are you saying I'm lying or are you merely claiming I'm a figment of this forum's collective imagination?
 

Amberlight

Senior Member
Oct 8, 2016
187
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#39
I am abnormal? I am lonely? I am depressed? I'm going to live a shorter life because I'm single?

Really?

(I can't argue with the part about having less sex - you can't get less than zero - but sex does not a life fulfill.) :rolleyes:

Galatea I get that you're single and hating it, but don't project your unhappiness on ALL singles. Some people are happy and single. Yeah, it's a real thing.

Do I not exist? I'm single, been single all my life, and I am neither lonely nor depressed. Are you saying I'm lying or are you merely claiming I'm a figment of this forum's collective imagination?
Statistically single men live shorter lives.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
24,799
8,103
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#40
Well I can't debate that part until I find out how long I will live. And after I find out I can't debate it because I won't be around to debate it.

But whatever life I have, I'm going to use it and enjoy it instead of spending all of it wishing I had a spouse I don't have.