the bar scene

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W

WIJeff

Member
#1
Nov 27, 2012
55
7
8
#1
Not eagerly considering my youngest son someday leaving the nest and my house being empty, I have considered different things to keep myself from being lonely. One was to visit a bar now and then just to be around people. Luckily I'm not a drinker and never would be and I seem to milk a drink forever when I seldom have one. I was wondering if anybody else does the bar scene now and then just to keep from being home alone. What's it like? Enjoy it at all? Besides my meetup.com groups and maybe a pet I might find enough socialization for myself (and this web site of course). But I keep the bar thing in the back of my mind as a fall back proposition.

P.S. this whole thing about going to bars and picking up members of the opposite sex I don't get. It's not even an idea I would consider. Picking up somebody by going up to them and flirting with them to get a date is like rocket science to me. I don't get it and could never master it. Actually I think rocket science would be easier.
 
Z

Zi

Guest
#2
#2
I would assume you'd feel more lonely as you would be around people who don't share your faith(maybe with a few exceptions) and therefore can't identify with you.. Companionship is about familiar, sameness.
 
Tommy379

Tommy379

Notorious Member
#3
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,151
113
#3
WIJeff said:
Not eagerly considering my youngest son someday leaving the nest and my house being empty, I have considered different things to keep myself from being lonely. One was to visit a bar now and then just to be around people. Luckily I'm not a drinker and never would be and I seem to milk a drink forever when I seldom have one. I was wondering if anybody else does the bar scene now and then just to keep from being home alone. What's it like? Enjoy it at all? Besides my meetup.com groups and maybe a pet I might find enough socialization for myself (and this web site of course). But I keep the bar thing in the back of my mind as a fall back proposition.

P.S. this whole thing about going to bars and picking up members of the opposite sex I don't get. It's not even an idea I would consider. Picking up somebody by going up to them and flirting with them to get a date is like rocket science to me. I don't get it and could never master it. Actually I think rocket science would be easier.
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I do it once a month. I usually go to the same place. I do flirt with women, but never call them after I leave. It's easy, the dudes that go there are just a bunch of college aged bearded ladies, so I just start buying drinks for females that are being ignored by whiney guys on their periods. I rarely find a girl at a bar I'm really into, but it's fun to see if I could get them.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#4
#4
Zi said:
I would assume you'd feel more lonely as you would be around people who don't share your faith(maybe with a few exceptions) and therefore can't identify with you.. Companionship is about familiar, sameness.
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9 times out of 10 that's true. But something I often do, and have heard many others do, is leave the t.v. on as background noise to feel less lonely. Or some people come to a chat/forum site for the same reasons, even though they may get little to no direct contact. (=
I think it's unwise to spend time at a place like a bar, and it's possible it will make him more lonely, but at times people simply need to be around others in any manner.
 
M

Miri

Guest
#5
#5
WIJeff said:
Not eagerly considering my youngest son someday leaving the nest and my house being empty, I have considered different things to keep myself from being lonely. One was to visit a bar now and then just to be around people. Luckily I'm not a drinker and never would be and I seem to milk a drink forever when I seldom have one. I was wondering if anybody else does the bar scene now and then just to keep from being home alone. What's it like? Enjoy it at all? Besides my meetup.com groups and maybe a pet I might find enough socialization for myself (and this web site of course). But I keep the bar thing in the back of my mind as a fall back proposition.

P.S. this whole thing about going to bars and picking up members of the opposite sex I don't get. It's not even an idea I would consider. Picking up somebody by going up to them and flirting with them to get a date is like rocket science to me. I don't get it and could never master it. Actually I think rocket science would be easier.
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Have you tried church, especially one with mid week meetings.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#6
Aug 13, 2014
24,896
8,156
113
#6
For some reason the "Cheers" theme starts playing in my mind. "Sometimes you wanna go / Where everybody knows your name..."
 
Z

Zi

Guest
#7
#7
Last point of yours I completely agree with!

Not that I don't with the rest.. you know what I mean?
Ugly said:
9 times out of 10 that's true. But something I often do, and have heard many others do, is leave the t.v. on as background noise to feel less lonely. Or some people come to a chat/forum site for the same reasons, even though they may get little to no direct contact. (=
I think it's unwise to spend time at a place like a bar, and it's possible it will make him more lonely, but at times people simply need to be around others in any manner.
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G

Galatea

Guest
#8
#8
My idea of bars in the US is they are like places to hook up, unlike pubs in the UK where people eat and drink as well as talk. Of course, I’ve never been in a bar in my life. I’m going by what I see on television and hear people say in real life. My great uncle was shot in the stomach in a bar and lost his leg. Of course, he was sleeping with a man’s wife- so he was not shot by a random stranger. Bars here in my area seem to be dangerous places. People get shot or knifed all the time.
 
D

Depleted

Guest
#9
#9
How about bowling in a league? Or pool? Or archer? Or bochhi ball? A card game? Classes to learn crafts? Seems odd to go somewhere if you don't do what is done there.
 
Tommy379

Tommy379

Notorious Member
#10
Jan 12, 2016
7,589
1,151
113
#10
I have that meetup app, unfortunately nothing is happening around here. You might have more in your area. I see a lot of Texas holdem games advertised on there. That seems like an interesting hobby to meet people.
 
red_red_wine

red_red_wine

Junior Member
#11
Oct 14, 2017
22
2
3
#11
In my opinion, all your going to find in a bar is a bunch of drunker lonely people hoping to hook with someone. As I see it, three things can happen when you go to a bar...One you meet with someone and have a one night stand...Second, you get robbed and killed, Thirdly, you go home still lonely....my suggestion to you is turn to God. Ask him what he has plan for your life and for companionship.
Here is a prayer I do when I get lonely
How I thank You heavenly Father that You are there all the time and have promised never to leave me nor to forsake me. What a great comfort it is to know that no matter where I am or what I am doing, I can call upon You, day or night.. knowing that Your ears are ever open to my cries for help....Lord, You know that there are times when I feel so very lonely. I feel that no one I know or seems to understand or even cares. I realize that they all have their own problems and interests - but even those that I am closest to.. do not seem to understand me or show any interest in me....Lord I know that part of the problem is that I am focusing on myself and my own needs instead of realizing that many other people are probably feeling much the same as me.. and have no one to talk to and no one who understands them.....Help me Lord to turn the eyes of my heart toward You every moment of the day and away from myself.. knowing that only You can provide the fellowship and intimacy that I crave for and that it is You alone Who can flood Your perfect peace into my heart and reveal Yourself to me in a new and special way. Thank You for being my Comforter and Counsellor – I pray that I may draw close to You in a way that I have never known before so that Your comfort and grace may flow through me to others who are going through a similar loneliness – this I ask in Jesus name,
Amen
 
M

Monnkai

Senior Member
#12
Mar 18, 2014
2,740
690
113
#12
I noticed since I found Christ I dont feel lonely anymore. As for Christian friends the only ones I have are on here. The friends I have dont share my faith but there supportive of it. Sometimes thats the best you ca hope for.
 
red_red_wine

red_red_wine

Junior Member
#13
Oct 14, 2017
22
2
3
#13
Monnkai said:
I noticed since I found Christ I dont feel lonely anymore. As for Christian friends the only ones I have are on here. The friends I have dont share my faith but there supportive of it. Sometimes thats the best you ca hope for.
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Yes that is pretty much you can hope for...God bless you and will be praying for you, brother.

Pslam 37:4 (KJV)
Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
 
Dino246

Dino246

Senior Member
#14
Jun 30, 2015
24,680
13,366
113
#14
Three guys walk into a bar. You'd figure at least one of them would have seen it.
 
F

FEDERALIST

Member
#15
Oct 9, 2017
30
0
6
#15
my view about going into bars that its an unsanctified place ,if your looking for a date there are other ways ,one of the best ways is to say im available and see what happens, so I wish you well from the FEDERALIST
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#16
Mar 13, 2014
41,304
16,297
113
69
Tennessee
#16
I was never one to hang around in bars. I used to enjoy the occasional gin & tonic but gave up alcohol 25 years ago. Nothing wrong in flirting with a women to pick up a date as long as it is someone that you were seriously considering for a long-term relationship. I don't think that looking for a prospective date in a bar is the way to go though but you just never know who you are going to meet. You probably have better odds in a bar than in a church.
 
tourist

tourist

Senior Member
#17
Mar 13, 2014
41,304
16,297
113
69
Tennessee
#17
red_red_wine said:
In my opinion, all your going to find in a bar is a bunch of drunker lonely people hoping to hook with someone.
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And the waitress is practicing politics,
As the businessmen slowly get stoned
Yes, they're sharing a drink they call loneliness,
But it's better than drinking alone.
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#18
Jul 3, 2015
55,817
25,994
113
#18
As a recovered alcoholic, I could not in good conscience condone anyone hanging out in a bar just because they are lonely, especially if you do not drink, unless of course you truly believed it was a calling from the Lord to minister to such people as frequent bars in the midst of throwing their lives away. I would suggest instead that you develop more healthy interests than worrying about the future. How old is your son?
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#19
Aug 13, 2014
24,896
8,156
113
#19
For some reason I am reminded of an outreach program started in 2010 called beer and bibles. As I recall it was not very well received by the church or by the bars...
 
Magenta

Magenta

Senior Member
#20
Jul 3, 2015
55,817
25,994
113
#20
Lynx said:
For some reason I am reminded of an outreach program started in 2010 called beer and bibles. As I recall it was not very well received by the church or by the bars...
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"Beer and Imbibing" or "Imbibing Beer" may have been a better name ;)

How about, "Imbibing Bibles with Beer"?

I wonder how receptive to Scriptural Truth habitual drunks are...

Of course the Irish are somewhat infamous for their religiosity
and drinking, but I don't think they necessarily set a good example :D
 
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