[FONT="]I'm currently working to pay off college debts to hopefully register back in college to hopefully work in the criminal justice system one day. I honestly don't care about love at this point. I have friends, we hang out a lot but that's enough for me. I don't think about looking for a girlfriend and hoping one day to marry her and have kids. I want to just focus on what I'm doing live in my house freely and live my life. Is that wrong to think that way? Is marriage actually worth it for me to try to pursue it?[/FONT]
Serious question Men and Women, is marriage worth it?
- Thread starter Socreta93
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As a Christian marriage before God is really serious.
He believes in it and expects us to as well.
Marriage is for real commitment and wanting to be together
with your wife for ever; and to have children is the real blessing.
Lots of people have married later in life.
I had my first child at 31 years of age and my last one at 41.
When you are ready for lifelong commitment and not a day before.
He believes in it and expects us to as well.
Marriage is for real commitment and wanting to be together
with your wife for ever; and to have children is the real blessing.
Lots of people have married later in life.
I had my first child at 31 years of age and my last one at 41.
When you are ready for lifelong commitment and not a day before.
Marriage is very fulfilling. I married to young as an unbeliever the first time. Divorce was an option and it happened after 16 years. I started my second marriage also unbelieving, but soon after came to Jesus. Life was good for 20 years, then she left me. I still consider her family after helping to raise her three kids. I am content to be alone now, but I don't regret a day of it. 
So, This is a question I've spent the last 5 or so years asking myself. Is Marriage worth it?
The short and long of it is that its not that simple. If the barometer in your life feels like you need to focus on doing you, and marriage seems like an unnecessary obligation, then do you and don't worry about it. Who you are in 5 years, 10 or 15 is not the same person you will be today, or were yesterday. A thousand things will change your mind going forward, but Marriage itself probably shouldn't be one of them.
Aiming for marriage while you aren't dating and very much single is a little like putting the cart before the horse. In same way, I would suggest keeping your ideas and timelines about marriage pretty close to the vest until you're pretty confident you're not going to scare someone off.
Marriage is like the Penultimate of best friendships. There's only so many people you can know and see, having to choose someone and be chosen is overwhelming. So take it slow, small, and one step at a time.
Sometimes the steps you take are steps to get ready before you ever meet someone. Its accomplishing your personal goals, developing good habits, setting yourself up for success, and developing good boundaries with the friends you do make. All these things are super helpful when you meet someone you want to spend more time with.
But the biggest thing if you are going into the great big vast ocean of open market dating, marriage is a companionship. Its not a race. Its not a trophy that says, "someone actually likes me! I finally fit in!" Marriage isn't an accessory or an obligation. It is a partnership. Its the split screen Co-op version of life. Only its not just the screen, you get to/have to share pretty much everything. (Except toothbrushes, don't ever do that you heathens)
If that is what you want, I would say make room for it in your long term goals. If or when you meet someone you like having around and sharing stuff with, you might find that it grows into a priority. Which frankly seems like the healthiest way to go about life.
You seem alright, I would keep doing what you're doing and don't overthink it too much.
The short and long of it is that its not that simple. If the barometer in your life feels like you need to focus on doing you, and marriage seems like an unnecessary obligation, then do you and don't worry about it. Who you are in 5 years, 10 or 15 is not the same person you will be today, or were yesterday. A thousand things will change your mind going forward, but Marriage itself probably shouldn't be one of them.
Aiming for marriage while you aren't dating and very much single is a little like putting the cart before the horse. In same way, I would suggest keeping your ideas and timelines about marriage pretty close to the vest until you're pretty confident you're not going to scare someone off.
Marriage is like the Penultimate of best friendships. There's only so many people you can know and see, having to choose someone and be chosen is overwhelming. So take it slow, small, and one step at a time.
Sometimes the steps you take are steps to get ready before you ever meet someone. Its accomplishing your personal goals, developing good habits, setting yourself up for success, and developing good boundaries with the friends you do make. All these things are super helpful when you meet someone you want to spend more time with.
But the biggest thing if you are going into the great big vast ocean of open market dating, marriage is a companionship. Its not a race. Its not a trophy that says, "someone actually likes me! I finally fit in!" Marriage isn't an accessory or an obligation. It is a partnership. Its the split screen Co-op version of life. Only its not just the screen, you get to/have to share pretty much everything. (Except toothbrushes, don't ever do that you heathens)
If that is what you want, I would say make room for it in your long term goals. If or when you meet someone you like having around and sharing stuff with, you might find that it grows into a priority. Which frankly seems like the healthiest way to go about life.
You seem alright, I would keep doing what you're doing and don't overthink it too much.
The marriage question! That is a big one! I tend to agree with the earlier writer who said about Paul stating that you could serve God better if you were single. Some times He calls us to singleness, sometimes he says its good to be married. Your wife either way can not be your "everything". God must be first for both of you and then you come together. She can't fill you like God can. In the right time God will bring you a wife if that is His plan for you. Don't settle for any one who is not a follower of Jesus when you are. It will only bring you hurt in the end. I always said "If he isn't following you whole heartedly, then please don't bring him my way! I'm better off being single. Marriage is hard work and with out God guiding and directing both of you it is a hard struggle and tough life. Ok, I'm off my preacher box! Take care!
H
H
The Bible says that "it is not good for a man to be alone" so is it worth it? Yes, but you have to do it for the right reasons and not just base your actions on feelings alone. Our pastor always say that the second most important decision you will have to make is choosing your husband/wife (the first one is choosing to accept Christ in your life) because it will affect the rest of your life. Hope this helps
Food for thought -
10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so
with his wife, it is not good to marry.
11 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying,
save they to whom it is given.
12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb:
and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men:
and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the
kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
Matthew 19:
10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so
with his wife, it is not good to marry.
11 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying,
save they to whom it is given.
12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb:
and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men:
and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the
kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
Matthew 19:
Criminal justice is one of those fields where you're probably gonna wanna have a spouse at home just so you have someone you can lean on for emotional support. Friends can only do so much. Being alone with your thoughts in an empty house is hard enough for those who don't have jobs where they are exposed to disturbing, unsolved cases or coming face-to-face with dangerous criminals everyday...
S
You are not wrong to think that way I guess and it is not wrong also for you to reconsider marriage in the future...
I can't say much about marriage because I haven't been there...(although I am still praying about it...I don't know what God's plan for me in the future)
Marriage is not for the fainthearted because if you will going to enter in marriage you have to take the baggage which comes along with it...it is not easy but for me it is worth it...
You asked if it is worth pursuing... I can say yes but only when you feel you are ready for it...Someday,when that person comes...imagine yourself sharing your life with this person..giving all of you and accepting her flaws being with her in sickness and health in failures and in triumphs ...support her dreams and celebrate with her.. walk with her and grow with her and will love her till your last breath here on earth then you have your answer...definitely marriage is for you and it is worth it...
Ohhhh and don't forget those tiny cute human beings too yayy can u imagine yourself being blown up by their cuteness not easy I guess but it is worth it
I can't say much about marriage because I haven't been there...(although I am still praying about it...I don't know what God's plan for me in the future)
Marriage is not for the fainthearted
because if you will going to enter in marriage you have to take the baggage which comes along with it...it is not easy but for me it is worth it...You asked if it is worth pursuing... I can say yes but only when you feel you are ready for it...Someday,when that person comes...imagine yourself sharing your life with this person..giving all of you and accepting her flaws being with her in sickness and health in failures and in triumphs ...support her dreams and celebrate with her.. walk with her and grow with her and will love her till your last breath here on earth then you have your answer...definitely marriage is for you and it is worth it...
Ohhhh and don't forget those tiny cute human beings too yayy can u imagine yourself being blown up by their cuteness
not easy I guess but it is worth it 