I was just thinking about this yesterday-- Everyone has influences of masculine and feminine, especially from parenting if they have a mother and father. How masculine or feminine a man is could be related to his relationship with his father, such as how masculine his father is. Did he take his son to watch boxing? Football? or did his son have a good relationship with his mother? It is one of the most complicated things about nature/nurture I think. Social standing is also an influence, was it an art family? sports family? white-collar? blue-collar? Church family? if so, what church? formal? social? once a month, easter bunnies? college family? authoritarian family? free-range chicken family!
social skills, character, participation in school? relationships growing up? friends with the girl next door?
Parenting plays a huge role in how kids turn out. If parents actively teach their children social skills, such as how a young man should treat a lady, or how a young lady should behave-- did they grow up in the country? city?
role models?
In the bible there are many examples of how men and women have lived their lives, from King David, who was a warrior with a heart for God, for romanced, for writing songs--love songs to God. And the Apostle Paul, who may have had a wife at some point, was very good about building relationships with communities. Peter had a leadership gift and commanded respect. John the Baptist lived apart from society and his role was not social but spiritual. the Apostle John was more emotionally sensitive, had the gift of prophecy, and very close to the loving heart of God, as would be seen more with women, and he was also an evangelist. His brother James seemed to have more of a teaching leadership.
My own view is that in general, women are much closer to God's heart, and God values our hearts above all, even though we as men have a vital role, at least in the stereotype view. One pastor said that "God came to save our hearts/souls, not our minds, which is one of the dangers of college, especially if kids are rushed into the college grind to perform, get ahead, make the most money you can!! If I had kids, I would have given them time to learn at their own pace, travel, learn in the world, not the textbook, and then finish a degree at their own pace, to make nurturing their hearts a priority.
The pace of this world can really trash hearts sadly, and we can seem to be becoming more like computers with each passing year. This does not please God. I think the Lord wants us to slowwwww downnnn....take a deeeeepppp breathhhhhhh...
take a break from fast-food and have one meal at the table with family, really spending quality time.
I think it comes down to a parent trying to see where their child is at from a nature view, and then nurture those God-given qualities. A parent has a VERY serious responsibility to ensure that their child understands that same-sex expression is not, nor will it ever be accepted in the true Christian community. The Bible is clear on this--crystal. From Sodom and Gomorrah, to the teachings of the Apostle Paul and all through the Bible. I was just reading today in fact in Leviticus I think that same-sex behavior is not allowed by God. Therefore, a parent must carefully help a child understand this, at least a Christian parent,and not set their child up for failure, unhappiness, anguish, and trauma, by teaching them that it is ok to sell-out to the worlds values and the "anything goes" mentality-- whatever makes you happy.
AT the same time, pressuring a child or young person, might lead them to rebel. Prayerful, careful guidance can save a child's future from the world's shipwrecks, and the devil's way of leading people astray, telling them to "eat, drink and be merry on board your ship--" and then leading their ship into a iceberg.
But, to me, Jesus is the perfect role-model for man. In this world, He was in touch with both his masculine side, and feminine side, perfectly. He was the gentle warrior, yet fearless, who stared down the creepiness of the devil and overthrew his schemes, yet He was in touch with His own heart, the hearts of all who He met and knew, and the women in His life adored Him because He was a powerful man, yet had a gentle heart for God and for people, and for life. He faced the powers of evil to save and redeem all that is good in the world, not just people.
There are many women in the bible, including Mary, who are good role-models for women. Others like Esther, and mary Magdalene, Sarah, female deacons in the New Testament, princesses, Queens, Mary is also known as the "daughter of Zion," and so it goes...
Over the centuries there have been famous Christian women such as Joan of Arc who challenged the traditional image norms, but not the sexuality norms and yet, remained faithful to God.
It's just a complicated question-- some women athletes like to be athletes in their private lives, and some like to put on a dress after the competition is over and have dinner in a romantic setting.
Same with men-- some football players have a sensitive side when they are off the field and with their wives and families.
I think I'm starting to ramble a bit. But, I saw this lady test-pilot once on TV who test flew a new huge plane. She is very capable, and not petite, and can handle the rigors of test-piloting. then there are the lady astronauts, men and women teachers-- this is an area where men and women are on an equal field maybe?
Christian pastoring remains a challenging area for women though--
Anyway, a few more examples from secular--
The movie, "First Knight," with Richard Gere as Lancelot-- I was talking with the daughter of a friend, and I think this is common with young women-- she was awed by the romantic scene with Lancelot where he directed rain-water with leaves to the escaping princess. She also showed duel roles as a Royal Lady, yet someone who knew how to survive.
How can we understand the power of a rose to a lady, also? The movie, "Fireproof," showed that God's power is behind loving relationships.
I think it's very important for parents to not allow their daughters to think of themselves in light of the world's standards and values that fall short. there are parents who dress their daughters in spandex since it's a popular way to dress. No daughter of mine would ever do that. Let them wear what they want, but, wear a skirt over it for Christian girls.
Anyway-- identity is very important. the most important part of identity is identity in Christ. Most women who become Christians keep a lid on their sexuality, or at least tame the horse-- and dress more modestly.
I just love the movie, "Pretty Woman," where both people matured into a more Christian character and identity, the business shark began to build things, instead of tear down communities for a buck, and the lady became a lady!
I think the answer is in getting closer to God's light--when we do this, our eyes are opened to areas where we might need to make changes in our lives....
soooo--- I guess I tried to answer your question!
Here's a video of some guy/lady dynamics---
<font size="4">[video=youtube;f5MOgcpUdQI]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5MOgcpUdQI[/video]