Is it wrong to look?

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K

kiwi_OT

Guest
#21
#21
May I use the example of Ruth -

She didnt harrass, stalk or nag Boaz to ask her out, but she did put herself in front of him so to speak. The dude was a lovely caring Godly business man who had only ever seen her grubby and working hard in the fields. He saw her awesome character and commended it but didnt see anything more til she got some female advice, got dolled up and put herself in his way and proposed that he propose to her. I agree that men are the ones who should pursue but man oh man do they need some help! They cant do it on their own! If they could the female race would be figured out and we know thats not going to happen any time soon.
So, give them a hand, drop a few hints until he either says clearly "Ok I get it, wanna go for coffee?" or "Im sorry, Im not interested." If he says neither then hes not too bright or hes a coward whose trying to avoid your point and you shouldnt bother.

To answer your other question about casual dating - I think you got it mixed up. The type of casual dating godly christians frown upon is the dating where the intent of the date is purely for your own selfishness (casual sex usually follows after), the casual date you described is what we call the first date as what it should be in the first place. A time to guard your heart but be curious about the other person and casually get to know them in a friendly non scary environment (preferably with other people around you for support and mutual space).

Hope that helps
 
D

DABEARS85

Guest
#22
#22
NodMyHeadLikeYeah said:
Its shocking you have less to say about anything :D
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Are you calling me an esoteric blabbermouth who never shuts up, and a person who talks way too much?

If so... well, you are probably right :D
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#23
#23
DABEARS85 said:
Are you calling me an esoteric blabbermouth who never shuts up, and a person who talks way too much?

If so... well, you are probably right :D
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uhhhh how to answer this.......... YES :p
 
K

kiwi_OT

Guest
#24
#24
One note to the boys

The bible gives advice but it also tells a story. So Judas hung himself after betraying Jesus. So cos its in the bible you should do that right? No...
Why speak of polygamy like God endorses it cos its in the Old Testament? We're still fighting a war in the middle east because Sarah pimped out her husband and the idiot went along with it cos it was choice luck to have free sex with a young exotic girl. None of the 'love' triangles in the bible were good, they were awful! In the beginning God made and intended one woman for one man. And that was it. He didnt pass 20 women in front of Adam and have him fool around with all of them before deciding on one like a sick reality show.

I tell all the women now - search the bible for femininity not feminism. I also ask the men out there to look to Jesus for inspiration in masculinity. Be aware of how to speak to women, sure be rough n tumble with each other, be strong as leaders, but be gentle with us. Men and women were both made in Gods image. Fighting over who is better is like saying which is better? My right foot or my right arm? Vastly differently roles but both are inherently important to Gods kingdom.

In 1 Peter 3 it says to treat women with kindness and respect and honour, if you as a man fail to do this, Peter says God will deliberately turn his back on you and will refuse to answer your prayers. Be kind to us please.
 
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Sharp

Sharp

Senior Member
#25
May 5, 2009
2,565
19
38
#25
Attention all women:


I love you
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#26
#26
Sharp said:
But if you had multiple wives they would work together to accomplish tasks that a man usually does. They would nag eachother.

For example, two women could push a lawnmower. Three women could clean the swimming pool. Four women could change a lightbulb. The possibilities are endless.
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Ask a man with several teenage daughters and one bathroom how well that whole- buncha-women-in-the-same-household cooperation thing works out. Or read about Abraham/Sarah/Hagar. Nations still war from that mess! :)

God + 1 man + 1 woman = successful godly relationship. Go ahead and look, but take your time...pray about it...don't allow anyone to rush you..or push you...and don't force something that isn't working. The reason it isn't working won't go away when you marry that person. It'll only get worse.
 
L

Lalilo

Guest
#27
#27
Some people go overboard, it's as if they can't stand being single. The greatest revelation I had when I become a Christian was that I am not along, Jesus is always with me. That really changed my life! I now look at people as friends rather than looking for someone to save me from myself.
 
C

crushed

Guest
#28
#28
Waiting for God to drop Mr. Right at your front door is not going to happen. Unless your planning on marrying the UPS or FedX guy, I strongly suggest you take a good hard look at your daily routines. Sometimes we get into a rut, going to all the same places, talking to all the same people and not creating the opportunity to meet someone new. Only a fool would continue to do the same things repeatedly and expect different results. If you want to meet Mr. Right, you'll have to learn to talk to the opposite sex and date. Dating is a natural process, it helps you discover what you like and don't like in our ideal partner. A really good book that addresses this very issue and gives you a good step by step process is written by Dr. Henry Cloud "How to get a date worth keeping." It's a good book that shows how to start dating worthy candidates in six months. This book is directed towards Christians and as such, I highly recommend it. Hope this helps.
 
MysticRain

MysticRain

Banned
#29
Nov 30, 2006
12
0
0
#29
I believe that if you ask the wrong questions, no answer will be fulfilling. Serve God with heart mind and soul. God will take care of the rest.
 
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MysticRain

MysticRain

Banned
#30
Nov 30, 2006
12
0
0
#30
This is excellent....well said. Ladies, try to take this to heart!

Lalilo said:
Some people go overboard, it's as if they can't stand being single. The greatest revelation I had when I become a Christian was that I am not along, Jesus is always with me. That really changed my life! I now look at people as friends rather than looking for someone to save me from myself.
Click to expand...
 
MysticRain

MysticRain

Banned
#31
Nov 30, 2006
12
0
0
#31
I just never cease to be amazed at how many girls spend sooo much time searching for pearls among the swine. Surely Jesus died for more than this??
 
J

Jennifleur

Guest
#32
#32
Sharp said:
Attention all women:


I love you
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Aww, how flattering! But, if you love all women, who will you choose? Ah, well, I guess you can move to a country where polygamy is allowed. But, having multiple wives will be more of a headache than it's worth. You've been warned. :D
 
Sharp

Sharp

Senior Member
#33
May 5, 2009
2,565
19
38
#33
Jennifleur said:
Aww, how flattering! But, if you love all women, who will you choose? Ah, well, I guess you can move to a country where polygamy is allowed. But, having multiple wives will be more of a headache than it's worth. You've been warned. :D
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aaaw Jen, none of my other wives could ever compete with you!

:D
 
M

magaritha

Guest
#34
#34
no its not wrong to look for your mr or mrs right but the bible says we must invite god in all areas of our lives so include god in your search
he will give the right person for just trust him you wont be disapointed.
 
F

FirePanther

Guest
#35
#35
I have seen too many lives being ruined by wrong relationships.. I prefer relying on God for the right christian girl :D I think there's much difference between staying with a christian and with a non christian.. I'm not going to stay with a girl only because she's attractive and maybe cool, she will share the life with me, so I desire a woman who has also a pure heart,a woman who loves God..In my opinion it's very important to be able to wait for the right one or you risk to be not happy at all picking too fast ;)

So my advice is to pray for this and ask God to provide the best for you ;) He wil, in the while you can grow with Him
 
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NukePooch

Guest
#36
#36
God doesn't want us to sit and wait for him to provide everything. He almost always requires a action or step in faith from us before He acts. God can do anything, but often He won't without some sort of action on our part to help show we believe...the saying (and book, etc) is, "If you want to walk on water, you've got to get out of the boat."

Pray without ceasing, then step forward. Join something new at church to meet new people. Go new places, try new things. Note: If you're stepping out away from God, you won't receive from Him...If you're hanging out at meat-market bars, that doesn't exactly fit into the category of 'walking on water to glorify God...'
 
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