Dating a Christian... Dating a non Christian... same thing?

A few weeks ago my friend was contemplating dating a non-Christian guy and of course I advised against it. I remember her saying" I would rather date a non Christian guy that treats me well then a "Christian" guy that doesn't." Her words were very true. A Christian guy I was dating (my first boyfriend) cheated on me. Also my dad a "Christian" guy cheated on my mom after 25 years of marriage. My dad's friend's wife cheated on him with two different guys. So my question is this: is dating a non-Christian really any worse than dating a Christian? what do you think?

[jimmydiggs]

Not at all the same thing. Do not be unequally yoked. The difference may not be present in some, but if a person who claims to be Christianis following the bible then you will seen a difference. The Christian views adultery as a grave sin, that he/she will have to answer to God for on judgment day. The non-religious views it as a bout of unfaithfulness in the marriage, and the only consequences lay within your heart., or the disappearance of said heart.

Generally though, it is a game of Tug-O-War. You want the bible taught to your kids, and the ultimate authority on how to govern your home. While the other will want otherwise.

[Thomas60]

2 Cor 6:14 does counter the idea, however in the case of it happening I believe there is another verse; 1 Peter 3:1,7 which supports keeping the marriage if it happens.
Deut 7:1-4 is also explicit

In my case however, I have ended up dating a christian during school, after university, its a less likely scenario, we almost got back together... after several weeks of talks we put it behind us, I can't share that part of her life, which seems a fair reply, though I suspect conflicts of the verses too.

[eric135]

Originally Posted by Madorno

A few weeks ago my friend was contemplating dating a non-Christian guy and of course I advised against it. I remember her saying" I would rather date a non Christian guy that treats me well then a "Christian" guy that doesn't." Her words were very true. A Christian guy I was dating (my first boyfriend) cheated on me. Also my dad a "Christian" guy cheated on my mom after 25 years of marriage. My dad's friend's wife cheated on him with two different guys. So my question is this: is dating a non-Christian really any worse than dating a Christian? what do you think?

Just because a guy (or woman, either way) says he's a Christian, doesn't actually mean he's a devout Christian. I could tell you I'm a 5-star chef, but that doesn't make me one. Some people go to church every Sunday, but going to church makes you a Christian like going to your garage makes you a mechanic. The way you live your life is what makes you a Christian, and the constant battle to become the best person you can be through the eyes of Christ.

So, is dating a non-Christian worse than dating a Christian? Yes, it is. Likely because you haven't actually dated or seen a true example of a "real" Christian.

Eric I get what your saying. I guess I'm just tired of people calling themselves Christians and then acting different. You see them hootin and hollerin in church, leading worship, being pastors but they are really just as bad if not worse then any nonbeliever out there.Its hypocritical. No wonder people hate Christians. I'm a Christian and I'm starting not to like us very much.

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

eat some choclate it will make you feel better

[eric135]

Originally Posted by Madorno

Eric I get what your saying. I guess I'm just tired of people calling themselves Christians and then acting different. You see them hootin and hollerin in church, leading worship, being pastors but they are really just as bad if not worse then any nonbeliever out there.Its hypocritical. No wonder people hate Christians. I'm a Christian and I'm starting not to like us very much.

I understand what you mean. It's hard to see people that are "representing" Christianity as leaders of the church do very un-Christian acts.
It's not that you don't like Christians, it's that you don't like fake people. People that "hate" Christians more-so hate extremists that constantly jam their beliefs down your throat, or the fake Christians that don't actually act like Christians. How can you hate someone for being a Christian when they don't act like a Christian?

[Timofree]

Originally Posted by Madorno

Eric I get what your saying. I guess I'm just tired of people calling themselves Christians and then acting different. You see them hootin and hollerin in church, leading worship, being pastors but they are really just as bad if not worse then any nonbeliever out there.Its hypocritical. No wonder people hate Christians. I'm a Christian and I'm starting not to like us very much.

I hear what your saying, but it's best not to judge Christianity on other Christians/people who say they are Christians. Mine, yours and any genuine Christians aim, should be, to be more like Christ........so with your eyes off others, and on Christ is the best place to be! It's up to genuine Christians, to make a stand for Jesus, and to shine His love from our lives, to convict those 'once a week Christians'
One way we can live by a biblical example, is having relationships with fellow Christians. You can't expect a non Christian, however nice they are to support us in the views and lifestyle we should desire to live by, it's not fair on them or yourself to expect them to.

As for, how do you know if they're Christians, there's no rush to be in a relationship. Spend time getting to know them, pray about it, and leave them in no uncertain terms, if they turned out to be lying about their faith, that would be the end! It's worth it in the end, trying to live fully for Jesus. A whole eternity to reap our rewards vs passing pleasure on earth

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

Along with my advice i mentioned earlier, i wanted to add something else to this.

Some people would say ohhhh its not fair to judge that non christian guys are better based off a few experiences, but i disagree. Im actually in the catargory with you that im startin to think non christian guys are better. I think this website has actually turned me off the most to christian men. There rude, judgmental and keep asking me if i wanna have their offspring, not to mention they lie like crazy!

So until i find a christian guy who actually acts like one... i refuse to date anyone..

Originally Posted by NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Along with my advice i mentioned earlier, i wanted to add something else to this.

Some people would say ohhhh its not fair to judge that non christian guys are better based off a few experiences, but i disagree. Im actually in the catargory with you that im startin to think non christian guys are better. I think this website has actually turned me off the most to christian men. There rude, judgmental and keep asking me if i wanna have their offspring, not to mention they lie like crazy!

So until i find a christian guy who actually acts like one... i refuse to date anyone..

...we're out here...

[White_Wolf]

Men weather Christian or not Christian, make mistakes, act like fools, etc... It seems to be ingrained in all of us to be neanderthals to one degree or another. However, when dating, and this goes for both men and women. We have to look at things objectively, and put our priorities in proper order, as the main reason to date at least from my standpoint, is to find your future husband/wife. In that, ask yourself what your priorities truly are. If God is your number one priority, then this question shouldn't be a difficult one. As a serial dater myself, and someone who has fallen in and out of relationships with Christians and non Christians, I now truly believe that for the Christian, the only option is another Christian. I wish to raise my children to know Christ and I must have a partner that is willing to support me in that. I need fellowship, and someone that will grow with me, pray with me, read the bible with me. A non Christian will not help you in that sense. Your husband/wife should be your best friend, and in that, should be able to truly share what should be the most important aspect of your life. And that is GOD.