Ladies: How to pursue a guy without pursuing him

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Batman1978

Guest
#41
#41
I don't think you getting the full picture here Julliana: the points/tips are used when you know the guy is a good guy or potential partner but he fails to see that you're interested in him (whatever the reason is).

I think everyone over the age of 18 and even below nowadays know that they should be careful when giving out contact details to guys they have just met or over the internet.

My intentions is clear, and in no way would I ever want to place a woman in danger so my number one rule is to be careful, protect yourself physically and emotionally.

I do care about all of you, especially ladies as I have sisters and love them very much, so I wouldn't want to see them hurt nor you.

And if you look at the tips I gave you will see that you're "hinting" to the guy and not outright telling him that you're interested, so there are minimal emotional damage when he doesn't budge compared to women that outright tell men that they have feelings for them.

Thanx for all the replies and thanx kayem77, much appreciated.
 
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Wonderland

Wonderland

Senior Member
#42
May 6, 2010
247
19
18
#42
How about making him jealous? I knew this guy liked me but was dragging his feet, so I told him I was going out on the town to find me a man. He was all indignant, "What, why would you do that?!" I explained that if he wanted to be with me, then I would be his girl, but until that happened I was on the market. It didn't take him long to make it official!
 
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Batman1978

Guest
#43
#43
Lol, everyone wants something they cant have.
 
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Rachelas

Guest
#44
#44
I agree with perdonato that a lot of those things should come naturally. If you have to constantly remind yourself to laugh, you probably don't like his humor lol
But this thread has been interesting. Made me think. So I'm glad for the topic :)
I personally wouldn't want to pursue the guy. I think that when a man pursues a woman,
it's generally showing signs of leadership. I think that it depends on the people, and the situation, and everything. But like I said, it's been good to think about.

Yay for rambles. :p
 
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usatoday

Guest
#45
#45
Hello

If I did all your well intended advice, I would be a walking billboard, "I want you". My friend and I had a running joke: If you say "Hi" to some men, they take that you are pursuing them.
 
K

kayem77

Guest
#46
#46
My friend and I had a running joke: If you say "Hi" to some men, they take that you are pursuing them.
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LOL , well sadly a lot of men are that way,but like batman said, a good man wouldn't think that or well.....depends of the personality of him but I do think is important to get him to know SUBTLY that you are interested...otherwise he will eventually get tired of pursuing you and getting no response.
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#47
#47
usatoday said:
Hello

If I did all your well intended advice, I would be a walking billboard, "I want you". My friend and I had a running joke: If you say "Hi" to some men, they take that you are pursuing them.
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I think that many women are like this. "Oh my gosh! He said 'Hi, How are you?' he's so into me!"
 
K

kayem77

Guest
#48
#48
I think that many women are like this. "Oh my gosh! He said 'Hi, How are you?' he's so into me!"
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hahahahaha I know....yo should watch the movie " He's not that into you" its so funny and talks about this :)
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#49
#49
kayem77 said:
hahahahaha I know....yo should watch the movie " He's not that into you" its so funny and talks about this :)
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i saw it. It was funny.
 
K

kayem77

Guest
#50
#50
yeaah...nobody want to see the crazy girl who calls the guy all day lol
 
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Renewedheart

Guest
#51
#51
Bake him a cake... if that doesn't work. I'll have it! =D
 
F

FireWire

Guest
#53
#53
Rachelas said:
I agree with perdonato that a lot of those things should come naturally. If you have to constantly remind yourself to laugh, you probably don't like his humor lol
But this thread has been interesting. Made me think. So I'm glad for the topic :)
I personally wouldn't want to pursue the guy. I think that when a man pursues a woman,
it's generally showing signs of leadership. I think that it depends on the people, and the situation, and everything. But like I said, it's been good to think about.

Yay for rambles. :p
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All fine but many women want to be leaders too and equal to men.
 
B

Batman1978

Guest
#54
#54
Well, I believe that knowledge and wisdom comes your way and it may not work for you now but might work for you later. Its like reading the Bible everyday, some scriptures you read today may not be applicable now but then later down the line you find that you're in a bit of a pickle and then you'll find that the scripture you've read in the past surfaces to help you with your situation.

One of my lady friends told me last year that no-one notices her, she's 27. She said that there are so many guys in her church but no matter what she does she doesn't get noticed and are constantly rejected. The problem was that she's quite a "big" person, has her hair cut in a boy's fashion cut, has grey hair here and there, always wear manly clothes so she looks like a plumber...now obviously guys won't take note of her but she has a great personality. So i told her to wear more dresses, wear panchos and dye and grow her hair, make herself look pretty, wear make-up that suits her...and not long after that she had guys coming up to her and complimenting her.

This woman had no knowledge of how to get noticed but was given knowledge and it worked for her. Its the same with guys that have little or no skills on how to pursue a woman, you can't just say "if a girl don't like you for who you are then tough on her", no...teach the guy how to pursue women. Interesting fact is that men that had a stable fatherly figure in their homes are more confident at pursuing women than men that had no or little fatherly guidance as the dad are supposed to teach his son how to treat a lady, so it also depends on the person's background and other factors.

anyway, sorry for the long preaching, lol.
 
grace

grace

Senior Member
#55
Sep 8, 2006
1,064
11
0
51
#55
Renewedheart said:
Bake him a cake... if that doesn't work. I'll have it! =D
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Aaron (NukePooch) told a story on here once of a girl that just showed up where he worked with a batch of brownies she make him. He said that it felt like she was a total stalker....so yea, can't say that advice would work on every man. ;)

(keep in mind, I do remember Aaron saying that he knows that he did not ever tell the girl where he worked...so she had to *find out* that info. To some guys this may seem sweet that she went through all that work....but yea, to some it just gives the impression of stalker and desperate.)
 
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Batman1978

Guest
#56
#56
lol, funny...thats definitely a stalker.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#57
#57
Batman, I do appreciate your heart and intent here. I really do. I know you mean well. :) And I do get the whole Stepford Barbie Improv thing. Women can read about it in pretty much every issue of Seventeen, Glamour, Cosmos, etc. The thing is, when you lay those articles beside God’s image of what a woman should be and do in Proverbs 31, it can be a bit difficult for young ladies to reconcile at times. :) It can be discouraging to them.
I’m not saying such ploys don’t work. I’m saying that sometimes they can work a little TOO well and christian young ladies can find themselves attracting not only the guy in whom they may be interested (and they might even give THAT guy the wrong idea), they may well find themselves attracting the sort of guys that loving, all-too-trusting, christian young ladies are ill-equipped to handle. That’s my only point...proceed with caution. :)
‘Makes me long for the peacock and cardinal worlds where it’s the male who has to do the "I’m-so-pretty-look-at-me" dance. ;)
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#58
#58
usatoday said:
Hello

If I did all your well intended advice, I would be a walking billboard, "I want you". My friend and I had a running joke: If you say "Hi" to some men, they take that you are pursuing them.
Click to expand...
Amen, sister! LOL Especially online! That server message will pop up indicating a new user, so you say hello to welcome them to CC and some guys think you're hitting on them. :)
 
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thimsrebma

Guest
#59
#59
Jullianna said:
Batman, I do appreciate your heart and intent here. I really do. I know you mean well. :) And I do get the whole Stepford Barbie Improv thing. Women can read about it in pretty much every issue of Seventeen, Glamour, Cosmos, etc. The thing is, when you lay those articles beside God’s image of what a woman should be and do in Proverbs 31, it can be a bit difficult for young ladies to reconcile at times. :) It can be discouraging to them.
I’m not saying such ploys don’t work. I’m saying that sometimes they can work a little TOO well and christian young ladies can find themselves attracting not only the guy in whom they may be interested (and they might even give THAT guy the wrong idea), they may well find themselves attracting the sort of guys that loving, all-too-trusting, christian young ladies are ill-equipped to handle. That’s my only point...proceed with caution. :)
‘Makes me long for the peacock and cardinal worlds where it’s the male who has to do the "I’m-so-pretty-look-at-me" dance. ;)
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I know quite a few guys who do that dance. If you are not a pro body builder you do not need to look it. ---pic removed---
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#60
#60
thimsrebma said:
I know quite a few guys who do that dance. If you are not a pro body builder you do not need to look like it./quote]

hahahaha A gal could get hurt dancing with a guy like that, huh?
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