TO ALL SINGLE FORUM READERS

[RadioU]

NOTE: TO ALL SINGLES FORUM READERS

I have read most of the post in the singles forum and have noticed a trend in pretty much every single thread.
Almost all of the regular commenters are single and mid-late twenties.
This normally would not be a problem except for the fact that nothing is getting done except all of you repeating the same lines over and over again.
I have read thread after thread of women complaining about a lack of Godly men and men a lack of Godly women.
This whole notion needs to stop.
There are plenty of Godly men and women, the problem is that you are not looking properly.
Dont get my wrong, i do not claim to have any special knowledge, I am no relationship expert.
The only advice I can give to all of you complainers is this:

The Christian life is like a race, we are running towards the goals that God has set before us. The way that you know that someone is right for you is if you see someone running as fast as you are towards those same goals as you. If you are moving faster than them in oyur faith then you should not slow down for them, and in contrast if they are running faster than you you shouldnt want to hold them back in their race towards Christ.
However if you see a Christian running at the same speed as you and there is a natural attraction between you than there is nothing stopping you from getting married. Never once in the Bible does it say there there is only one person you can marry and thats it. Infact this notion is a silly notion because if that was true then your "perfect match" could already be married, thus screwing over you and another person, and then the chain reaction can go on from there.

So basicially what i am saying is that you should stop complaining about a lack of Christian men and women but rather look at the goals God has set before you and wait until you are alongside another believer going in the same direction and at the same speed as you.

Just my thoughts.

 

[Scottybrandon]

awwww.. . I hate running

 

[Adrianv125]

Brother Radio U, To you a big AMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN!!!!!

Yes this complaining NEEDS to Stop now.

James 1:2-4
2My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;
3Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience.
4But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

Wanting NOTHING!!

First Submit your whole life, desires, plans, feelings, thoughts, actions, EVERYTHING to the will of God, then by faith ask for anything that is in His Will and it will be given to you!. Quit Speculating as in why you don't have a partner, that shouldn't be your focus. Your focus must be to please our Master, we were bought with a price!

God Bless You all!

 

[perdonato]

The minute we complain should be a tell that we've got something to work on in ourselves. God's timing is perfect. I am clearly not ready to meet the man with whom I will spend my life... and that's okay. He's also not ready to meet me. I have more time to prepare and look forward to the day he is also prepared to meet me

Jesus offers a love more perfect than any man or woman could ever offer. He's pursuing us passionately and wants our attention. He LIKES us. I don't think it's wrong to have hopes of someone in the future... but I do think it's awesome to take advantage of this time we can devote ourselves fully to Christ and not be distracted by the details in humanity.

I actually haven't read too many posts in the singles forum but I wholeheartedly agree that complaining is certainly not the way to go. Instead of looking at the flaws of the people in our lives we ought to be focused on fixing the flaws in our own lives. I think it'd be hard to see the "perfect man" or "perfect woman" when we're failing to work on being the perfect person they deserve.

 

[Sevndust]

i can see clearly now the rain is gone......

 

[zeroturbulence]

Run Forrest! Run!!

 

[SocialArtist]

I mean it's easy to say these things when you're 18. I mean 18, 21, 24, 27 and 30 are all completely differently worlds. I don't think if I sat 5 versions of myself down from 5 differents years of my life we'd all be in the same scenario. Take into consideration a lot of these people who complain have probably been through a lot of seasons.

Again you're 18, I recall being 18 at church and my church was packed with girls my age. The next year they all disappeared as did I for college. I'm just saying.. once high school ends the demographics change. I remember being 20 and like where did all my peers go? College, moved, etc.

Also I've switched churches, but I mean young adults come and go. I see the youth groups in all of these churches packed with Christians. Not the young adults groups. It's a whole different world and I can understand why people complain.

 

[seoulsearch]

While I understand your point, it IS the Singles Forum, and we get new members all the time who may be posting for the first time, so chances are, the same questions will be repeated. I certainly understand what you're saying, but I think that we need to also keep in mind that it's important to maintain a welcoming and encouraging atmosphere for newcomers as well. (A newcomer may be someone who's been on the site for a while but is just now starting to post threads and so forth, too.)

To be completely honest, I've seen almost as many threads here hollering at people to "quit whining" as much as I see "Where are the good Christian men/women"? threads, so, it evens out in the end. It's kind of a cycle, if you watch the trend of the threads... "Why can't I find a good Christian guy or girl?" "Ahh... shut up, and just seek the Lord!!" is generally what someone else will eventually post...

And yes, there is a huge difference in one's life, thoughts, and experiences as the decades pass, at least in my opinion. However, I've known just as many older singles who are asking the same question... ("Where are all the good Christian men/women?")

 

[Seriously_Cool_Wife]

I remember being single, and desiring that mate and the struggles to find one. One thing I learned upon looking back is that I should have been looking at myself and what God wanted to do in MY life to get me ready for marriage instead of looking for a match. I spent a lot of time 'complaining', too... and it's unfair of me to expect single people to not have some of the same feelings I had. It's all part of the process of growing and depending on God.

 

[thimsrebma]

I mean it's easy to say these things when you're 18. I mean 18, 21, 24, 27 and 30 are all completely differently worlds. I don't think if I sat 5 versions of myself down from 5 differents years of my life we'd all be in the same scenario. Take into consideration a lot of these people who complain have probably been through a lot of seasons.

Again you're 18, I recall being 18 at church and my church was packed with girls my age. The next year they all disappeared as did I for college. I'm just saying.. once high school ends the demographics change. I remember being 20 and like where did all my peers go? College, moved, etc.

Also I've switched churches, but I mean young adults come and go. I see the youth groups in all of these churches packed with Christians. Not the young adults groups. It's a whole different world and I can understand why people complain.

I totally agree. When I was 18/19 I didnt care about being in a great relationship. I was going to college doing my own thing, I wasn't ready to merge my life with anyone. Now that I am mid/late twenties starting a family is definitely more important to me. Just because I talk about finding or being found by someone, doesnt mean that a huge portion of my life or thoughts revolve around this. My singleness, and thoughts thereof, is just one fraction of who I am.

I don't like to look at it as complaining. Yes there are some people who complain about being single but there are people who complain about everything.

Personally I think it perfectly reasonable to share concerns and opinions about being single, why you are single and how we can move on into the next stages of life, wether thats marriage or not. Everytime someone brings up a subject doesnt mean they are complaing. They are looking for answers. Thats what these forums are for anyway. To give Christian people a way to discuss different topics with each other. Being single is just one of them.

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

NOTE: TO ALL SINGLES FORUM READERS

I have read most of the post in the singles forum and have noticed a trend in pretty much every single thread.
Almost all of the regular commenters are single and mid-late twenties.
This normally would not be a problem except for the fact that nothing is getting done except all of you repeating the same lines over and over again.
I have read thread after thread of women complaining about a lack of Godly men and men a lack of Godly women.
This whole notion needs to stop.
There are plenty of Godly men and women, the problem is that you are not looking properly.
Dont get my wrong, i do not claim to have any special knowledge, I am no relationship expert.
The only advice I can give to all of you complainers is this:

The Christian life is like a race, we are running towards the goals that God has set before us. The way that you know that someone is right for you is if you see someone running as fast as you are towards those same goals as you. If you are moving faster than them in oyur faith then you should not slow down for them, and in contrast if they are running faster than you you shouldnt want to hold them back in their race towards Christ.
However if you see a Christian running at the same speed as you and there is a natural attraction between you than there is nothing stopping you from getting married. Never once in the Bible does it say there there is only one person you can marry and thats it. Infact this notion is a silly notion because if that was true then your "perfect match" could already be married, thus screwing over you and another person, and then the chain reaction can go on from there.

So basicially what i am saying is that you should stop complaining about a lack of Christian men and women but rather look at the goals God has set before you and wait until you are alongside another believer going in the same direction and at the same speed as you.

Just my thoughts.

What about powerwalking????

 

[Liamson]

NOTE: TO ALL SINGLES FORUM READERS

I have read most of the post in the singles forum and have noticed a trend in pretty much every single thread.
Almost all of the regular commenters are single and mid-late twenties.
This normally would not be a problem except for the fact that nothing is getting done except all of you repeating the same lines over and over again.
I have read thread after thread of women complaining about a lack of Godly men and men a lack of Godly women.
This whole notion needs to stop.
There are plenty of Godly men and women, the problem is that you are not looking properly.
Dont get my wrong, i do not claim to have any special knowledge, I am no relationship expert.
The only advice I can give to all of you complainers is this:

The Christian life is like a race, we are running towards the goals that God has set before us. The way that you know that someone is right for you is if you see someone running as fast as you are towards those same goals as you. If you are moving faster than them in oyur faith then you should not slow down for them, and in contrast if they are running faster than you you shouldnt want to hold them back in their race towards Christ.
However if you see a Christian running at the same speed as you and there is a natural attraction between you than there is nothing stopping you from getting married. Never once in the Bible does it say there there is only one person you can marry and thats it. Infact this notion is a silly notion because if that was true then your "perfect match" could already be married, thus screwing over you and another person, and then the chain reaction can go on from there.

So basicially what i am saying is that you should stop complaining about a lack of Christian men and women but rather look at the goals God has set before you and wait until you are alongside another believer going in the same direction and at the same speed as you.

Just my thoughts.

Amen to that!

 

[Ice_Tiger]

Quote from RadioU:
Never once in the Bible does it say there there is only one person you can marry and thats it. Infact this notion is a silly notion because if that was true then your "perfect match" could already be married, thus screwing over you and another person, and then the chain reaction can go on from there.

So basicially what i am saying is that you should stop complaining about a lack of Christian men and women but rather look at the goals God has set before you and wait until you are alongside another believer going in the same direction and at the same speed as you.

Just my thoughts.

Excellent point about the "perfect match", way too many Christians believe that lie.

 

[RadioU]

What about powerwalking????

PowerWalking is acceptable if one has a heart condition, or other form of disability which prevents them from running

 

[RadioU]

I totally agree. When I was 18/19 I didnt care about being in a great relationship. I was going to college doing my own thing, I wasn't ready to merge my life with anyone. Now that I am mid/late twenties starting a family is definitely more important to me. Just because I talk about finding or being found by someone, doesnt mean that a huge portion of my life or thoughts revolve around this. My singleness, and thoughts thereof, is just one fraction of who I am.

I don't like to look at it as complaining. Yes there are some people who complain about being single but there are people who complain about everything.

Personally I think it perfectly reasonable to share concerns and opinions about being single, why you are single and how we can move on into the next stages of life, wether thats marriage or not. Everytime someone brings up a subject doesnt mean they are complaing. They are looking for answers. Thats what these forums are for anyway. To give Christian people a way to discuss different topics with each other. Being single is just one of them.

While I understand your point, it IS the Singles Forum, and we get new members all the time who may be posting for the first time, so chances are, the same questions will be repeated. I certainly understand what you're saying, but I think that we need to also keep in mind that it's important to maintain a welcoming and encouraging atmosphere for newcomers as well. (A newcomer may be someone who's been on the site for a while but is just now starting to post threads and so forth, too.)

To be completely honest, I've seen almost as many threads here hollering at people to "quit whining" as much as I see "Where are the good Christian men/women"? threads, so, it evens out in the end. It's kind of a cycle, if you watch the trend of the threads... "Why can't I find a good Christian guy or girl?" "Ahh... shut up, and just seek the Lord!!" is generally what someone else will eventually post...

And yes, there is a huge difference in one's life, thoughts, and experiences as the decades pass, at least in my opinion. However, I've known just as many older singles who are asking the same question... ("Where are all the good Christian men/women?")

I mean it's easy to say these things when you're 18. I mean 18, 21, 24, 27 and 30 are all completely differently worlds. I don't think if I sat 5 versions of myself down from 5 differents years of my life we'd all be in the same scenario. Take into consideration a lot of these people who complain have probably been through a lot of seasons.

Again you're 18, I recall being 18 at church and my church was packed with girls my age. The next year they all disappeared as did I for college. I'm just saying.. once high school ends the demographics change. I remember being 20 and like where did all my peers go? College, moved, etc.

Also I've switched churches, but I mean young adults come and go. I see the youth groups in all of these churches packed with Christians. Not the young adults groups. It's a whole different world and I can understand why people complain.

I thought about addressing all of these indivdually, however a multiquote is MUCH easier.

To Social Artist: i understand the age difference, and i do not claim to have any insight at all. You may be right that it is much harder at those older ages, however that doesnt change my message.. it simply makes it harder to follow.

To SeoulSearch: You are right, i did not take that into consideration, i am use to reading the same people replying to all forum posts in the singles page that i forget new people do comment occasionally. haha. I simply have wanted to post this for awhile but could never find the right words until i talked to a friend recently and that gave me a small bit of inspriation so i seized it.

To Thimsrebma: What we concern ourselves with is what we devote our time to. If we concern ourselves with singleness all the time that is what our thoughts are focused on. I never said there was anything wrong with having questions on being single or naything of the sort, and if i came across that way i apologise. The idea of the post was not to tell people to not look to get married, but rather to give a different perspective on how to look.

 

[thimsrebma]

I thought about addressing all of these indivdually, however a multiquote is MUCH easier.

To Social Artist: i understand the age difference, and i do not claim to have any insight at all. You may be right that it is much harder at those older ages, however that doesnt change my message.. it simply makes it harder to follow.

To SeoulSearch: You are right, i did not take that into consideration, i am use to reading the same people replying to all forum posts in the singles page that i forget new people do comment occasionally. haha. I simply have wanted to post this for awhile but could never find the right words until i talked to a friend recently and that gave me a small bit of inspriation so i seized it.

To Thimsrebma: What we concern ourselves with is what we devote our time to. If we concern ourselves with singleness all the time that is what our thoughts are focused on. I never said there was anything wrong with having questions on being single or naything of the sort, and if i came across that way i apologise. The idea of the post was not to tell people to not look to get married, but rather to give a different perspective on how to look.

I think that was my point. Some of us get on here and every now in then maybe vent about rarely meeting compatible people but for the most part, if you follow any of our threads or responses they are on diverse topics, not just that one subject. When we do talk about relationship issues we are getting ideas from others about how to look in a different way, as you put it.

The longer you are here the more you will be able to see different peoples personalities come out and see we are more then just sinking singles submerged in a sea of singleness. See u probably see my personality coming out already. lol.

 

[RadioU]

I think that was my point. Some of us get on here and every now in then maybe vent about rarely meeting compatible people but for the most part, if you follow any of our threads or responses they are on diverse topics, not just that one subject. When we do talk about relationship issues we are getting ideas from others about how to look in a different way, as you put it.

The longer you are here the more you will be able to see different peoples personalities come out and see we are more then just sinking singles submerged in a sea of singleness. See u probably see my personality coming out already. lol.

I have been following the singles forum for over a year now, just saying.