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J
When I think about age differences, I don't think in terms of numbers really, but rather maturity and life experience. Since I don't want to date someone I wouldn't consider marrying, anyone I date would need to be comparably mature both spiritually and in life experience. I don't want to have to be the leader in my home. This is why I would be willing to date someone who is quite a bit older, but not quite a bit younger. I don't see anything wrong with large age differences, I just don't see it working for me. I have been interested in younger guys from time to time, but it just felt...awkward.
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G
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I agree with you, aquagal, even going younger on the maturity level, without giving an age.
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For your specific question, JeFreak, I would be VERY careful about going out with a 17 year old, or even 18. You are what maybe through with a couple, three years of college , or even got a college degree, and she is not even out of high school. Just have to REALLY let the Lord lead, but, me speaking, you want the girl to have a chance to find out who she is and at 17 it is very difficult, I think, for her to know that.
it can work at your 22 and 17 ages though, no doubt, IF God has put you together then it WILL work ! But, yeah, hmm, uhhhh, yeah, going out with a girl 5 years younger, and, I don't like to use that legal reason of '18,' but zere is right and there ARE a lot of fish in the sea, I would cast your net for a year and then maybe she is still there and that just further lets the Lord lead you . Pray about it, JF , God bless
I agree with you, aquagal, even going younger on the maturity level, without giving an age.
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For your specific question, JeFreak, I would be VERY careful about going out with a 17 year old, or even 18. You are what maybe through with a couple, three years of college , or even got a college degree, and she is not even out of high school. Just have to REALLY let the Lord lead, but, me speaking, you want the girl to have a chance to find out who she is and at 17 it is very difficult, I think, for her to know that.
it can work at your 22 and 17 ages though, no doubt, IF God has put you together then it WILL work ! But, yeah, hmm, uhhhh, yeah, going out with a girl 5 years younger, and, I don't like to use that legal reason of '18,' but zere is right and there ARE a lot of fish in the sea, I would cast your net for a year and then maybe she is still there and that just further lets the Lord lead you . Pray about it, JF , God bless
K
I usually like older guys, I don't know why I don't feel like guys my age are my age, I see them as if they were younger haha weird right? maybe because I haven't met guys my age that I consider mature both spitiritually or emotionally. Maturity is what matters at the end, if the guy is 25 and acts like 16, that ain't gonna work. My preference is that he is from 2 to 8 years older but I guess that at the end, I just want someone who is mature enough to be a leader and loves the Lord as I do. If I can't have discussions about God with him, forgeeet it.
R
Aside from the whole legal technicality thing of dating a 17 year old in your 20's, 5 years age difference is nothing.
I would assume the most common age differences between people range between 1 year apart, and 10 years apart. It can vary greater than that, and still be perfectly normal for the people involved if they get on well and have lots in common.
A significant age barrier can add a challenge in relating to someone on certain things (being in two different areas in your life), but if that isn't an issue and you are in the same area and get along, it shouldn't be a problem.
Though I should add, the late teens can be a significant growing time for a teenage girl, depending on the girl. It's a time when they can be one person one year, and another person 2 years later. A time of fast maturing and learning how to start living with an adult brain. I changed a lot at that age. I've seen it happen with friends too...friends grow apart a lot at that age. Things usually calm down in the 20's (at least for me they did), and suddenly a 5 or more year difference in a relationship isn't as big a difference once both people pass early 20's.
but like I said, it depends on the people. Some mature sooner.
I would assume the most common age differences between people range between 1 year apart, and 10 years apart. It can vary greater than that, and still be perfectly normal for the people involved if they get on well and have lots in common.
A significant age barrier can add a challenge in relating to someone on certain things (being in two different areas in your life), but if that isn't an issue and you are in the same area and get along, it shouldn't be a problem.
Though I should add, the late teens can be a significant growing time for a teenage girl, depending on the girl. It's a time when they can be one person one year, and another person 2 years later. A time of fast maturing and learning how to start living with an adult brain. I changed a lot at that age. I've seen it happen with friends too...friends grow apart a lot at that age. Things usually calm down in the 20's (at least for me they did), and suddenly a 5 or more year difference in a relationship isn't as big a difference once both people pass early 20's.
but like I said, it depends on the people. Some mature sooner.
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My advice is tread lightly. A close friend of mine was involved with a girl 6 years younger than him (23 and 17). She had a lot of our church peers convinced that she was very mature for her age, but she wasn't. She had a lot of hidden drama and immaturity that generally comes with teenage girls. He knew that 18-year-olds were generally more immature, but he agreed to get into this based on her feigned maturity. He should have gotten to know her for longer, because it ended badly. There is a lot of maturity that goes on in even four years...don't assume she is in the same place in life as you right now.
I didn't read all the responses... but have you ever heard of the "divided by two, add 8" rule? Haha It's your age, divided by two and then you add eight. You're 22, so that'd be 11+8=19. It's silly in a way, but maturity levels do seem to match with this rule. (When you're younger especially) As a girl who likes to date older... I take my age, subtract eight and multiply by two. So I'm 24-8=16x2=32. I'd totally date a 32 year old no problem and that would generally be seen as acceptable. It's funny when you start doing it with older folks though... 70 divided by 2=35+8=43. A 43 and 70 year old together would kinda freak me out. Bahaha.
So I'm 24-8=16x2=32. I'd totally date a 32 year old no problem and that would generally be seen as acceptable. It's funny when you start doing it with older folks though... 70 divided by 2=35+8=43. A 43 and 70 year old together would kinda freak me out. Bahaha.
I
I have prayed about this many times and have come to the conclusion that If my vertical relationship with god is on spot then my horizontal relationship will be taken care of. God has given us all a moral compass to follow so who am i to judge whom God has for me. I have been on my own since i was 14 and have missed out on the teen and some college life experiences. i had to grow up fast so i have a load of life lessons. that being said I have always related better to younger people. i have been blessed with the baby face and look way younger than my peers. I have been carded many times when buying wine for my cooking. I t also depends if i shave clean and the way i dress.
C
I agree with Jullianna as well - I don't see age in a matter of numbers but more where two people are on a level of maturity and like-mindedness. For instance, there is a couple in my former church that has a unique situation; the husband is 54 and his wife is 93. I myself think that this is a bit MUCH as far as age difference, but my mother and stepfather are 45 and 54 and that's okay - It depends on each person's preference and what God allows for them, I suppose.