What Should I Do?

Laretta · #1 (**permalink**) January 31st, 2012

My best friend says he loves me but I don't feel the same way. My bff tells me that she loves him. I'm stuck in the middle. I've been friends with these two since we were in dipaers. I like her brother who is joingin the army soon. I don't like hurtin anyone if I can always avoid it But I need to get my point across. Any advice? It would be galdly accepted.

GreenNnice · #2 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by Laretta

My best friend says he loves me but I don't feel the same way. My bff tells me that she loves him. I'm stuck in the middle. I've been friends with these two since we were in dipaers. I like her brother who is joingin the army soon. I don't like hurtin anyone if I can always avoid it But I need to get my point across. Any advice? It would be galdly accepted.

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Good time to draw closer to God and find out what He wants you to do. He will tell you. Not sure how. Scripture verse. Situation. Pray and find out. That is the beauty of a life lived in Christ. God bless you, retta
The Lord leads

Laretta · #3 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Thanks for the advice.

GreenNnice · #4 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by Laretta

Thanks for the advice.

Yw.

Just go with God , sorry not more specific to situation, not sure what else to say, cept if you really like this guy going in army and you want to let him go but you pray, read scripture, and, you can't get this guy out of your mind still, and you know in your heart it is not just insecurity of not having a bf, then, if that guy still on your heart after having prayed to God for answer, then don't let him go away for army life without telling him something like: ' i am not sure what life brings from here on now but i will be praying for you while you are away. If you want, write. ' a year might seem like long time, his tour of duty, but your faithfulness in that time will quicken your love, I think, because of that distance meted a year later.

That is what i would do. I think, if I was a girl and liked a guy, a lot, that was army bound. That is an awesome career too, serving our country . Praise God for servicemen, and, women , in USA and all over the world.

Ok, im uh outta here, GBU, retta

PopClick · #5 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Well, I will always agree with advice to pray about something. God loves you and wants the best for you, though it might not be what you think you want, lol... and it says in the bible to "cast ALL of your cares upon Him, for He cares for you."

But on a human level, giving sisterly advice here... I would ask the guy what he thinks of the friend. Yes, it's nosy, lol... but whatever you do, don't tell guy that friend likes him. If that was told to you in confidence, don't betray her trust (as I'm sure you already know).

Guy friend's answer might make it a bit more clear what you are supposed to do next.

Good luck!

Jullianna · #6 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Pray, be kind/loving and be honest. That's the best any of us can do in such situations.

Ugly · #7 (**permalink**) February 1st, 2012

Seems fairly simple. If you don't have feelings for the guy, then tell him. Sure, its not good to hurt people, but you aren't going to be able to go through life never hurting anyone. Just go tell him, in a nice, respectful and direct manner, no thanks. And don't take forever to do it. Go, get it done. The longer you wait to tell him the more likely he is to be hopeful, the more he will allow himself to feel things for you, and the more damaging it will be to him.
Far as your other friends desire to have romance with this guy, i'd stay out of it. That should be between them and God. If she wants him, she should speak up to him. But he has feelings for you, so putting yourself in that situation could backfire. So really, just stay out of it.

GreenNnice · #8 (**permalink**) February 2nd, 2012

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ugly

Seems fairly simple. If you don't have feelings for the guy, then tell him. Sure, its not good to hurt people, but you aren't going to be able to go through life never hurting anyone. Just go tell him, in a nice, respectful and direct manner, no thanks. And don't take forever to do it. Go, get it done. The longer you wait to tell him the more likely he is to be hopeful, the more he will allow himself to feel things for you, and the more damaging it will be to him.
Far as your other friends desire to have romance with this guy, i'd stay out of it. That should be between them and God. If she wants him, she should speak up to him. But he has feelings for you, so putting yourself in that situation could backfire. So really, just stay out of it.

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LOL, I didn't comment at all on the guy who likes you, retta, but you like army guy, anyway, yes, Ug, is a good one to get advice from, just do it ALL with God, I would add. Pop!Clickt too, sisterly advice from her sounds good to me

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Pray and all julieannie says to in a few short words there, that is all we can do in situations that are tough to do and breaking this guy's heart that likes you that you don't like, I just encourage you to pray to God and go and lovingly let the person know you don't llike them more than a friend but you would like to keep being friends .

God bless ya, retta

Laretta · #9 (**permalink**) February 2nd, 2012

I want to thank off of yall for the advice. It was really helpful. I really appericate it. God bless.