What I Think I SHOULD Feel vs. What I Actually Feel

[MusicalMe]

There's a joke that I've always loved:

A pastor visited the Sunday school class of some young children one morning and decided to get them to warm up to him by asking them some questions. He asked, "I'm thinking of something small and furry, with a big bushy tail. What is it?"
The children stared at him and said nothing.
He continued, "It likes to eat nuts and climb trees."
Still nothing.
Finally, one young girl timidly raised her hand. The pastor called on her and she responded, "I know the answer is supposed to be Jesus but it sounds like a squirrel to me!"

I think very often as Christians, we know what we SHOULD say or what we SHOULD feel... but how often is it what we actually feel? Where's the line between honesty and 'behaving like a Christian'? How might spouting off "Sunday school answers" damage your relationships?

Thoughts?

 

[Mands]

Oh wow MusicalMe! Such a great point. I think most times in relationships we feel like we know what we should say, what is expected, and what is going to make the other person happy. Which sometimes causes us to keep things from them - if we start to get into the habit of thinking we know what we SHOULD say, instead of thinking of how we actually feel about the situation, and being more like "I feel like I should be saying this, but I don't feel that. This is how I feel (or am thinking) about this _______." Maybe this isnt exactly what you were asking lol but this is the thought that popped into my head when I read your post. I really think we need to evaluate things more - and don't say the things we feel we SHOULD say just because we think its the answer - sometimes its better to take a risk like that little girl and say exactly what we think and feel.

Honesty is the best policy

 

[Mands]

Besides, no one is more aggrivating than a Christian who thinks they know everything lol! Sorry, but its true. It's better to be humble and you can still behave like a Christian but say "hey, I think this is what you want me to say, but this is how I think it should go down!!"

 

[Kakashi]

I totally get the whole " Sunday school" answer thing that you're talking about thing.

People are tired of the cliche( even though I am guilty of this as much as anyone) but rather, we should let how Christ thought be in our thinking. It's not so much as we should sound "churchy" as we should actually be Christlike which means we should be loving and all that entails from that.

Christ was honest, and from reading the gospels, sometimes seemed rude in doing so, but he always did it in love. What we feel about something might not always be the right thing to say either, but being honest about how you feel is a totally different thing altogether. I think Jesus prayed with honesty, and felt some things that he did not act on, but he gave himself to God to make sure that what he did with these feelings was right.

I know I've prayed to God sometimes saying " God, this is how I feel about this, but I don't know if it's right, so I'm going to let you lead me and I'll be patient to see if what I feel is right or not"

Does that make sense? I'm trying my best to grasp what your saying in this thread, and I'm kinda tired at the moment lol

 

[MusicalMe]

How does the old saying go? "It's better to be hated for something you are, than loved for something you're not"...

It's so easy to fall into thinking things like "they won't love me if they find out about this," or "if I acted a bit more like that THEN he might go out with me" but it's not real. You are who you are, faults and all. Unfortunately being a Christian doesn't automatically take away your humanity - ...actually, scratch that. It's not unfortunate, it's a good thing. If it was automatic then there would be no learning to rely on Christ...

Anyway, even as Christians, we still have a human approach to everything, and this means tendancies towards jealousy, anger, pride, hatred, bigotry, judgementalism (judgementality? Judgementalosity? Judgementaldisestablishmentarianism?) and all those other nasty traits. The funny thing is - the world knows it, but it seems like we're not so readily willing to admit it. We don't want to admit that we don't have all the answers and that we're not as Christlike as we want to be, and even that we probably don't want to be as Christlike as we feel we ought to be (still with me?).

Just like the "if, then" statements before - there's no need to act like "if I do this, God won't love me anymore." We know that's ridiculous. I'm not saying we shouldn't strive to overcome our human nature - I'm just saying it's time to be honest about the fact that we all still have human nature.

I hope this made sense. I've got a lot going on this week so my brain is kind of a mess.

 

[seoulsearch]

I've posted this in other threads... "I'd rather have the ugly truth than a pretty lie." I would rather get through all the garbage honestly... even if a few not-so-pretty words or phrases are thrown in... then have someone stand there and give me an automated, plastic, "expected" Christian answer. One of the reasons why I love God is because I know He works with me as the REAL me, not something other Christians expect me to be or say.