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Don't feel bad for what you have written. At best, you only prompted me to think about things from my past. You didn't actually cause any of it; it is already set in the stone of history. And, it's not that I am experiencing anything like "clinical depression" -- that is not the case at all. I am perfectly stable and self-aware in mental capacity, etc. What I have written is merely a reflection of what I have learned from self-observation and my life in general.
It is a "deep-level" - not a "depression-level" - loneliness that I experience - if you know what I mean. While it is certainly "distracting" at times, it does not prevent me from doing the "normal" activity of a "normal" daily life - working a job, etc. It does not mean I never laugh -- lately, I have just kackled at some of the stuff other CC members have come up with and written into their posts. I couldn't help but chuckle at your last sentence in the post quoted above.
I can "function" just fine in my daily activity. That is not a problem. It is not like I am just sitting around crying all the time or something. ( I am not saying anything against anyone crying when they need to -- it is a well-known accepted fact that crying provides for an emotional 'release' - even for men, not just for women. ) In fact, I rarely do cry. And, I am a bit of a 'softy'. There are things that "touch my heart" enough to make me shed a tear. But, I very rarely "just let go and bawl" - I tend to keep it inside. And, believe it or not, one of the reasons for this is -- I do not have my best friend and companion to hold - and her to hold me - while I cry. Some things seem "too lonely" to cry about outside of having that special someone with you - "crying alone" does not seem to be enough...
Like I said before - everything seems to come back to the woman.
The loneliness I describe is [ simply ] "just there" - "all the time" - always reminding me of that one very special thing I have never been blessed to have in my life.
Sorry if I over-stated it. I did not mean to.
I am sorry about your troubles and pain. And, it serves as a reminder for me to be grateful for the blessings I do have - which are many.
I just don't have the one thing that I have always wanted the most.
Don't worry about what you wrote. I like honest answers. They are the best kind that there is.
Sorry about your love lost -- it is always painful to be at the threshold of something you believe will be wonderful - only to have it ripped away from you.
I understad this quite well - believe me, I do.
It is a "deep-level" - not a "depression-level" - loneliness that I experience - if you know what I mean. While it is certainly "distracting" at times, it does not prevent me from doing the "normal" activity of a "normal" daily life - working a job, etc. It does not mean I never laugh -- lately, I have just kackled at some of the stuff other CC members have come up with and written into their posts. I couldn't help but chuckle at your last sentence in the post quoted above.
I can "function" just fine in my daily activity. That is not a problem. It is not like I am just sitting around crying all the time or something. ( I am not saying anything against anyone crying when they need to -- it is a well-known accepted fact that crying provides for an emotional 'release' - even for men, not just for women. ) In fact, I rarely do cry. And, I am a bit of a 'softy'. There are things that "touch my heart" enough to make me shed a tear. But, I very rarely "just let go and bawl" - I tend to keep it inside. And, believe it or not, one of the reasons for this is -- I do not have my best friend and companion to hold - and her to hold me - while I cry. Some things seem "too lonely" to cry about outside of having that special someone with you - "crying alone" does not seem to be enough...
Like I said before - everything seems to come back to the woman.
The loneliness I describe is [ simply ] "just there" - "all the time" - always reminding me of that one very special thing I have never been blessed to have in my life.
Sorry if I over-stated it. I did not mean to.
I am sorry about your troubles and pain. And, it serves as a reminder for me to be grateful for the blessings I do have - which are many.
I just don't have the one thing that I have always wanted the most.
Don't worry about what you wrote. I like honest answers. They are the best kind that there is.
Sorry about your love lost -- it is always painful to be at the threshold of something you believe will be wonderful - only to have it ripped away from you.
I understad this quite well - believe me, I do.
Okay...okay.
loverofjesus27: Actually, that isn't true. I know a couple of people on here who are just a few months younger than me. Also, as far as I can recall, there used to be a male user who claimed to be only 10-11 years old, or whatever. However, he was swiftly banned...you know...because of CC's age limits and all.
And I once scrolled through the members list, and I saw someone who claimed to be 0 years old...yeah right, buddy...
loverofjesus27: Actually, that isn't true. I know a couple of people on here who are just a few months younger than me. Also, as far as I can recall, there used to be a male user who claimed to be only 10-11 years old, or whatever. However, he was swiftly banned...you know...because of CC's age limits and all.
And I once scrolled through the members list, and I saw someone who claimed to be 0 years old...yeah right, buddy...
T
That sums it all up. The big, dark void. That empty space of knowing it should be someone but that someone is..... ???? I am still confused and low. And I know.. I should praise the Lord through everything. But right now, I just feel he was teasing me. He showed me something beautiful. Someone that really touched my heart, saw me, made me whole. What was built up over time was just removed in a second. So. Join the lonely hearts' club, brother. Perhaps one day you can proudly and happily leave it. Now I have to get back to life. Work and studies call. Best news today was that I brought a smile to your face. And that has to be the best achievement for a long time. I don't know if it works... But I really feel like tickeling you. Would be great to see your smile. Seriously.
So Monday is payday where I work. If a given Monday is a holiday, the main office sends the checks early so they will be there anyway. So today we found out our paychecks weren't there when we were supposed to get them...
If you want to see a workplace full of coworkers turn into a workplace full of viragoes real fast, just tell them their paychecks aren't in on time. You could almost see the air get darker.
Calls were made back and forth and it turns out the main office sent the checks early. FedEx dropped the ball. Worse yet, today was the store owner's birthday and he was trying to enjoy it. He left what he was enjoying, went to the main office, reprinted all them checks and had them sent to the respective stores via maintenance men.
So anyway, there sure were a bunch of cranky people at work today. I was a bit grumpy myself, but I kept my mouth shut as much as I could.
One thing for sure, now I know why amazon.com uses UPS.
If you want to see a workplace full of coworkers turn into a workplace full of viragoes real fast, just tell them their paychecks aren't in on time. You could almost see the air get darker.
Calls were made back and forth and it turns out the main office sent the checks early. FedEx dropped the ball. Worse yet, today was the store owner's birthday and he was trying to enjoy it. He left what he was enjoying, went to the main office, reprinted all them checks and had them sent to the respective stores via maintenance men.
So anyway, there sure were a bunch of cranky people at work today. I was a bit grumpy myself, but I kept my mouth shut as much as I could.
One thing for sure, now I know why amazon.com uses UPS.
