Relationship Advice?

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HayleyKatt

Guest
#1
#1
I'm currently in a relationship but I'm definitely confused whether I should be or not. I know that I love him but I'm wondering if this relationship is the right one for me because I don't feel loved. I always pictured myself with a guy that had his life together, knew what he wanted out of life, and most importantly put the Lord and family before anything else. My boyfriend is a gamer and it feels like all his time and money is spent towards gaming though. We have a son together who is one. I feel like it would be selfish of me to leave my boyfriend and our son have separated parents when I could stay with him and make things work for our son.
 
Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#2
Feb 3, 2010
3,078
69
48
#2
I vote that this be moved to the Family Forum.


You live together, you have a son. You are a Family. Leaving him because he plays video games... thats a problem but one that can be overcome.



I would say find someone Godly that he respects and ask that person to mentor your Boyfriend.





And of course the traditional "Why aren't you married" finger wagging will commence probably so... brace yourself.
 
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GreenNnice

Guest
#3
#3
Pray to God, follow Him. this is like liamson said, it's counseling advice, and, with that said, find a good, supportive Christian counselor who will make you move in His planned direction for your life. The situation you described is not cut and dry, it's quite complicated and will take time to 'carve' out a plan that is best for all involved.

The Lord will never leave you or forsake you, hayleyHis , keep following Him, the Lord leads, we all make mistakes, and, forgiving others goes a LONG ways in solving situations, too. And, sometimes, words are not ONLY what we must do, ACTIONS must show the other that we are 'game' on doing things so that both are healed, so that God can work, be open, He is in the miracle business, milady . :)
 
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Hungry

Banned
#4
Nov 26, 2012
3,095
1,050
113
#4
You are asking the wrong questions. The question isn't should I leave my problems. Problems are going to face you all your life. The right question is how can I make this better. He is probably the same guy you fell in love with from the start. You changed I'm sure and rightfully so with a child involved and expected him to. He just needs proper motivation. Does he have an adult male role model that could encourage the metamorphosis into responsible father and husband? Its difficult to comment when I don't know the guy. If it seemed more like fun than work being responsible he might welcome the change. Sad to say middle aged adolescence is a popular trend these days. If you are constantly fighting and he becomes more of a dependant than a provider then I would definitely suggest you separate temporarily until he gets his life in order. Just a wake up call. If you decide to leave do yourself a favor and don't look for someone else to fill the void because you will most likely be continually disappointed. Focus on being a great mom for now.
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#5
#5
HayleyKatt said:
I'm currently in a relationship but I'm definitely confused whether I should be or not. I know that I love him but I'm wondering if this relationship is the right one for me because I don't feel loved. I always pictured myself with a guy that had his life together, knew what he wanted out of life, and most importantly put the Lord and family before anything else. My boyfriend is a gamer and it feels like all his time and money is spent towards gaming though. We have a son together who is one. I feel like it would be selfish of me to leave my boyfriend and our son have separated parents when I could stay with him and make things work for our son.
Click to expand...
Are you a Christian?
Are you asking whether living with a man who is not your husband and having children with him is a right relationship for a Christian?
Are you asking how to develop a more loving relationship with this man?
Is HE a Christian?
Does he want the relationship to work?
Does he love you?
What is his relationship with your son?
Are you looking for information regarding his gaming addiction?
Is he interested in getting help?
Are the needs of your son being neglected due to his gaming addiction?
How will whatever actions the two of you take (or DON'T take) affect your relationship with Christ and your son's welfare?

For your son's sake in particular, please discuss these questions with your bf. Many of us would be happy to pray for you and listen as you seek God's plan for your family.
 
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah

Guest
#6
#6
Playing video games instead of spending time with you and your kid... He sounds like a tool.
 
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HayleyKatt

Guest
#7
#7
He doesn't have a good guy role model in his life when it comes to relationships. He says he's a Christian but I don't see it in him. From reading these responses I've realized that I don't want to be with him because he is immature and I need someone to step up and be a responsible provider for this family. I'm going to stay with him because I'm going to ask him to go to Christian couple counseling together.
 
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Jullianna

Guest
#8
#8
Sounds like a great first step. His interest in going to counseling with you will say tons about how invested he is in the relationship.

Please continue to pray for your family and let us know how it's going, ok? :)

We serve a big God. :)
 
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