When is it ok for a man to cry?
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I think it's perfectly human to cry when an emotion overwhelms you, whether you're a man or a woman. I have sat with guys who have cried in front of me and it's been because they're really going through some tough things. I personally hate the belief that men should never cry or that it is somehow weak--I could not see myself with a man who could not express his emotions in full. God made us to have feelings and to show them!
However, something I can't stand is anyone, male or female, who will cry as means of manipulating other people--I went out with a guy for way too long who used to do that and I utterly hated it. People would try to confront him about his drinking, addictions, lack of responsibility... and he would start crying and saying how hard his life was simply because he was using it as a means of escaping confrontation. Yes, he HAD been through some tough times, but never chose to face them or do what it took to overcome them. He would also use sob stories to try to get people to feel sorry for him (and he always used his kids as a means of trying to get people to give him money). After I dated him for a while and he got to know me, I found out he was trying to use stories from MY life to get people to give him money as well... and he saw NOTHING wrong with any of it because he saw it as "people being generous" instead of him weaseling it out of them. And then, of course, would spend it on alcohol.
I COULDN'T STAND THAT.
Expressing feelings? Good. Using a person's OWN feelings to manipulate someone else's? BAD.
However, something I can't stand is anyone, male or female, who will cry as means of manipulating other people--I went out with a guy for way too long who used to do that and I utterly hated it. People would try to confront him about his drinking, addictions, lack of responsibility... and he would start crying and saying how hard his life was simply because he was using it as a means of escaping confrontation. Yes, he HAD been through some tough times, but never chose to face them or do what it took to overcome them. He would also use sob stories to try to get people to feel sorry for him (and he always used his kids as a means of trying to get people to give him money). After I dated him for a while and he got to know me, I found out he was trying to use stories from MY life to get people to give him money as well... and he saw NOTHING wrong with any of it because he saw it as "people being generous" instead of him weaseling it out of them. And then, of course, would spend it on alcohol.
I COULDN'T STAND THAT.
Expressing feelings? Good. Using a person's OWN feelings to manipulate someone else's? BAD.
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Hmm.....a guy should not cry over a papercut or shaving injury (but then again...neither should a woman.)
Also.....you describe moderate pain as a gun shot or stab wound., or broken limb...??? *insert shocked face here* Ha!
Other than those observations about your poll...I think it is ok for a guy to cry. Why would it not be..?
I would almost think it odd that a guy would not be drawn to emotion on some occations.
Also.....you describe moderate pain as a gun shot or stab wound., or broken limb...??? *insert shocked face here* Ha!
Other than those observations about your poll...I think it is ok for a guy to cry. Why would it not be..?
I would almost think it odd that a guy would not be drawn to emotion on some occations.
L
When i was married i only saw my husband cry once, but i think it was because while he was at his girlfriends house i threw all of his stuff out in the front yard while it was raining, so when he came home and saw all of it was ruined he started to cry. I might have also smashed a few of his things to.. AAANNYWAYS! I find it perfectly acceptable for a man to cry, however, i dont want a cry baby. I like a guy to be a guy, if that makes sense. So i wouldnt like it if he was like constantly crying over something.
J
Tears are exceptable but crying in general is a hard thing for a man to do or at least it is for me. Not because we dont feel pain or have no emotion I think its deeply ingrained in us that "men dont cry." Althought there are times when nothing would feel better than to just let it out. For example the only time I ever saw my dad cry was on the alter at church, it was the first and last time. The man is a hero to me so what would one expect would become of me, I dont cry much havent cried in years but I remember the times it has happened it felt great to let it out. Ultimately its a case by case situtation cause we're all different. I think for a man to break down and cry, I mean really release, is usually an indication that change is inevitable.
On the other hand when a women crys its ok, but its the one thing that always stops me in my tracks and I then proceed to do anything humanly possible to make them stop. Its a good defense ladies touche.
On the other hand when a women crys its ok, but its the one thing that always stops me in my tracks and I then proceed to do anything humanly possible to make them stop. Its a good defense ladies touche.
M
Nothing wrong with crying, it's a perfectly natural thing and I think we have to stand against the ridiculous idea that crying is a sign of weakness in a man, it's simply in a sign of humanty in anyone, male or female.
That said over-emotional and over-sensitive people who go to tears over the slighest little things are quite annoying and people who cry to manipulate are obviously well out of line.
I hardly ever cry although I will confess a few times in my life a good film has drawn a few tears, though I don't consider myself weak becaue of that.
That said over-emotional and over-sensitive people who go to tears over the slighest little things are quite annoying and people who cry to manipulate are obviously well out of line.
I hardly ever cry although I will confess a few times in my life a good film has drawn a few tears, though I don't consider myself weak becaue of that.
M
I get this, I do think for men in general it takes something big to happen to get that flood of emotion and when it happens it often leads to recognition of something, or maybe something has just been reconcilled and changes will show in him from that point on, it's not just an expression of a feeling like it can be for women.
