Taking Control of a relationship? Who's in control? Is submission for marriage ONLY ?

[GreenNnice]

Have you ever tried to take a relationship into your own control, thinking that you could do something that was not what God wanted but that was still OK because it felt right ?


What did you do ! Was it exciting ? Was it coool ? (Let's not get toooo personal here, huh )


Did you start to quit going to church with your boyfriend/girlfriend and things turned sour?

Did you begin to compromise on 'bases' you would go to?

Did you just gloss over the fact they told you that they 'were a Christian but church wasn't that important to them?

Did they say things that affected your walk with Christ, maybe, attacked you, even, but you just brushed those thoughts aside because you REALLY, REALLY liked them ?




What happened ?


Was it a good or a bad thing, you think, looking back, that you took control of a relationship in a manner you felt it should go?

I'm going to take this thread a step further and, maybe, I should make a different thread.......

Do you think that Christ should be in total control of a man and woman married relationship ONLY, or, for single folks seeing each other in a relationship, does that same rule of thumb apply, guy is to be submitted to by girl?
We know, per Scripture, that Christ is head of the church and of man, and, that man is head of the woman; that's what Ephesians 5 says. Wife is to submit to husband IN EVERYTHING.

Anyhoo, but, what do you think? Oh, and, BOTH of the wed ones should have a deep appreciation and respect, or, 'reverence,' for Christ in the relationship? I think that means, in how they treat each other, the understanding of being respectful and not demanding. So should singles too have that same 'reverence' of Christ in their relationship? Of course, we know that answer. But, WHAT about to each other, what level of respect, submission is to be there, if any, in your mind?

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.


25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing[SUP]b[/SUP] her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30for we are members of his body. 31“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”[SUP]c[/SUP] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Does it seem unfair that a guy and gal liking each other should treat each other with such a serious respect and admiration and that the girlfriend, as long as she goes out with Him, should submit to Him ?
I'm JUST asking this question.

Now, it's your turn to get TITANIC on me, fire away! Fire away !

 

[Grace-Like-Rain]

In my understanding, a young lady is to submit to her father until such time as he "gives her away" in marriage... at that point her husband would become her "head".

 

[Loveneverfails]

Before marriage, I submit to Christ first, then my father (and mother). After marriage, I will submit to Christ first, followed by m husband.

Regardless of whether a couple is married or just dating, Christ should remain in control.

 

[Shouryu]

I'm going to take this thread a step further and, maybe, I should make a different thread.......

Do you think that Christ should be in total control of a man and woman married relationship ONLY, or, for single folks seeing each other in a relationship, does that same rule of thumb apply, guy is to be submitted to by girl?

I think it's far simpler than you're trying make it.

I shall answer your question with another question.

Is there ANY part of our lives that we should NOT give to Christ for total control?

If the answer is no, then your question is answered pretty easily.

If the answer is NOT no, then we have a completely different debate on our hands.

 

[GreenNnice]

In my understanding, a young lady is to submit to her father until such time as he "gives her away" in marriage... at that point her husband would become her "head".

Yes ,graceHisrain

Before marriage, I submit to Christ first, then my father (and mother). After marriage, I will submit to Christ first, followed by m husband.

Regardless of whether a couple is married or just dating, Christ should remain in control.

Yes, HisLoveneverfails. Christ submitted to, and, then....?

Honor mom and dad is how I would put it.

I think, the word 'submit' applies to marriage ONLY when compared to those not married requirements.


Christ alone is who we are to submit to outside of marriage.

I think it's far simpler than you're trying make it.

I shall answer your question with another question.

Is there ANY part of our lives that we should NOT give to Christ for total control?

If the answer is no, then your question is answered pretty easily.

If the answer is NOT no, then we have a completely different debate on our hands.

No. None, shobrightpony. We are to submit to Christ's will for our lives just like Christ, on Earth, submitted to His FAther in heaven.


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So, should a girl SUBMIT to a guy in a relationship outside of marriage? NEVER.

But, once married, Scripture is clear. "The wife is to submit to the husband in everything.' Yes, both are to submit to each other, Scripture says, too, so, the guy knows he is to respect his wife, as she is the 'weaker vessel.'
BOTH the husband and wife are to be in reverence to Christ, per Scripture, too, which means both are to have a deep respect and appreciation for Christ's work having been done in BOTH their lives by dying on the cross so they can be 'free' to go to heaven after they die and be present with the Lord.


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God bless us all for submitting to Christ for our single lives', for perfectly planned plans by Him Jer. 29:11

 

[KittenofMelchisedek]

My kjv has "Submitting themselves one to another in the fear of the Lord" as one of the descriptors of how saints should treat eachother, before moving on to the next topic, which you guys have nailed down pretty good. Over the years, this is one I've had fun with. We are so good at keeping people out of our comfort zones. This is one of those things that you have to use discretion and discernment with, but just try it. If it isn't sin, and isn't hurting anything, just submit. Next time your boss tells you to do something, don't argue or add to his idea, just go do it peaceably. God comes up with interesting rewards for obedience. Before we are married we are brother and sister. Think of it like having an older sibling babysitting or whatever, you still had to do what you were told.