Christian Guys: sex, masturbation, etc.

I read, you asked for a male opinion, perspective, but I would like to respond to your issue if I may?

From a female perspective....

When we are at a maturity level to handle sexual activities, and/or we do the right thing, and wait until marriage, or a true commitment, and all things in order, even before marriage, then I think it is okay for sex to be involved.

God truly does only bless certain choices, and at times it depends on the type of people and the character of those you are around.

I have known some men, guys to suffer because there bodies are responding in a physical way, with arousal, even if they are not watching porn, or a beautiful woman, sometimes this is nature's way. So, what do they do, suffer? No. Your suggestion could be an answer.

Also, sex takes energy, physical, emotional, spiritual, and a female does always have the energy or desire to do so, so what is man to do, rape her, force her, manipulate her feelings so she makes a decision in her favor, telling her she is weird for not wanting to be sex freak, nympho. No, well some men do, and they are wrong, and bring alot of hurt on this earth.

I know this hurt, and it may never be healed. I am afraid of most men, because of their forecful attitudes and inability to understand the more gentle nature of a true woman.

Hope this educates you and that you have an open mind, even if you do not agree, at least you know there are thousands if not millions in this world who do not agree, or have different lifestyles.

God Bless.

Sex is not the most important thing in life, and unless you truly want to enter into that decision, no other should make you suffer for respecting the humanity of our bodies. True?

[Crypto]

Originally Posted by REDMama

When we are at a maturity level to handle sexual activities, and/or we do the right thing, and wait until marriage, or a true commitment, and all things in order, even before marriage, then I think it is okay for sex to be involved.

And your view is un-Biblical and therefore wrong. God designed for sex to be INSIDE OF MARRIAGE. I don't think the Bible could be any more clear on that.

[Suzie2family]

*Steps up to the mic hesitantly...* Are women even allowed in this thread? If not, then I apologize for intruding. Maybe things are very different for men than they are for women in this regard but I have to say I disagree that masturbation in and of itself is wrong. Even little children have been know to do this and perhaps some of them but I don't think ALL of them were exposed to sexual situations or erotic content that caused them to do this. I think the pleasure of sexual feelings comes from our basic human nature--"The woman and the man were both naked and were unashamed"

If the mind is pure, then what God has given us as a gift is not wrong--it's only when we add in sinful things such as porn or make a certain person the object of our mind, that masturbation becomes wrong. I would ask God to give you a pure mind--not give you no desire! I contend that GOD gave you the desire--it's up to you to decide if your thoughts are pure or not. If your thoughts are pure then we know that "everything God created is good."

Just my two cents worth...

[Megatron]

Originally Posted by Crypto

And your view is un-Biblical and therefore wrong. God designed for sex to be INSIDE OF MARRIAGE. I don't think the Bible could be any more clear on that.

So if youre married its okay? Like what if you're on a business trip and you know you were thinking about your wife and then you know things happen? Would it be wrong then?

[Crypto]

Originally Posted by Megatron

So if youre married its okay? Like what if you're on a business trip and you know you were thinking about your wife and then you know things happen? Would it be wrong then?

Yep because sex is to meet the needs of the other person, not your own.

[Suzie2family]

Originally Posted by Megatron

So if youre married its okay? Like what if you're on a business trip and you know you were thinking about your wife and then you know things happen? Would it be wrong then?

I don't read anywhere in the Bible that sex is just to meet another person's needs. I do read that our bodies are a temple of the Holy Spirit and that we should honor God with everything and that we should not deliberately deprive sex from one another in marriage, or we give an opportunity for Satan.

As for a married guy on a business trip--what could be better than to tell your wife you missed her so much that you couldn't think of anything but getting back home to her!? If I was your wife, I'd certainly feel MORE close to you knowing you thought of ME--not some cheap imitation that might have been available on the cable channel! I wouldn't condemn you.

[Paul87]

As for me masturbation is very wrong It can make your relations with friends or girlfriend (boyfriend) difficult

However I am also "addicted" to this and to watching porn
I dont know how to handle this My only hope is praying and asking friends to pray for me

[Maddog]

Originally Posted by Suzie2family

I think the pleasure of sexual feelings comes from our basic human nature--"The woman and the man were both naked and were unashamed".

I think you're half right. It's true that sex is pleasurable by design, but it dioesn't follow that masturbation is therefore a natural expression of sex. I think there's a clue is in your quotation, but you italicised the wrong bit. It's 'The woman and the man were both...'

[Suzie2family]

Originally Posted by Maddog

I think you're half right. It's true that sex is pleasurable by design, but it dioesn't follow that masturbation is therefore a natural expression of sex. I think there's a clue is in your quotation, but you italicised the wrong bit. It's 'The woman and the man were both...'

My point in this verse was to show the purity of their thoughts, as intended by God's original design. They were pure, despite seeing one another naked because they had no impure thoughts toward the other (sin hadn't entered the world). In a sinful world we are affected by seeing another person naked--that's a result of the fallen world we live in now--but we can ask God to give us His thoughts toward the opposite sex and ask Him to renew our minds to the pure state He originally intended. That is not possible through our own efforts--that's why we need His grace. Spiritual growth is a process--not something we suddenly arrive at (at least not as long as we are in this world.) But people can and do change, through the power of God, praise the Lord. I also believe just because a guy has impure thoughts toward women now doesn't mean he's doomed to that state of mind for the rest of his life.

[youngnazarene]

Thanks to everyone who responded (yes, I realize this thread is a billion years old, but here I go).

Allow me to confront a few things.

Firstly, sex before marriage = heck to the no. That is sin. And if anyone tries to comfort you otherwise, remember 1st John 3:7-9, "Dear children do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil's work. No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God's seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God."

Secondly, Jesus never gave in to temptation of any kind, sexual temptation included. However, Jesus was fully man and fully God. Therefore, He faced sexual temptation head-on, just like any other human being, yet unlike the rest of us, He overcame it every single time. Don't forget His human nature. Cling to it the same way you cling to His Godly Nature.

Before I conclude, the reason I wanted to talk to guys only is because of the content, but if women are reading, I just hope you're not offended by the language; thanks for your input, it is truly appreciated.

I've realized that we are sexual creatures. But no, that is wrong. We are spiritual creatures inside of human shells. Our real bodies await us; when Jesus returns and sets things in their rightful places, fully redeemed, hopefully you and I will know what it's like to live anew in His Second Coming, new bodies and all, from Glory to Glory. Until then, it is our responsibility and honor to honor Him with everything, including our earthly bodies, and that should be the fruit of our love for Him, the spiritual product of our dedication to Him.

I figure if you are dishonouring God when you masturbate, don't do it. Yeah, that's how I feel, but that's not really an answer now, is it?

As creatures endowed with sexual needs and responsibilities, I do believe there is a time and season for masturbation. However, this day and age has turned many innocent curious boys into simply repulsive men, whose fantasies dive far and deep into the reaches of sin and death, allowing images to sink into the corners mind and lead us by the hand straight into hell's gates. In all honesty, I think the only way to "be in the clear" when you masturbate is to think about one day having a wife and pleasing her. Is that wrong?

At the end of the day, I don't think it's my place to talk to anybody about masturbation; it takes a mighty man of God to successfully undertake such a task. And if you're a Godly Christian man, who loves Jesus and His Followers, then when you do talk about masturbation to those of us who are younger and less mature, do so with a Godly Heart. We need your advice, as the Spirit would see fit to give it.

After more than two years of reflection, and after 24 years of being a guy, that's all I can come up with.

I love y'all! God bless you, my brothers and sisters...

[Canadian36]

Just breifly to weigh in......

Until I was 18 I was pretty naive when it came to sex. I honestly didn't even know fully what masterbation was. lol ... So I spent much of my time playing sports, working out, hagging with friends etc etc. And I had such an easy fun peaceful carefree life. I mean life was grand. Without going into a lot of detail, when I was 18 I got caught up in all that junk and it's been a struggle ever since. Just don't know if there's any getting away from it. Not sure what to think other than I think it's an epedmenic these days. ouch. I doubt you'd go to hell over it. but you got to be careful as it could lead to worse stuff right. And I think there's nothing wrong with always just trying to live right even if you've failed a million times. ;-p

[slalom]

i masturbate 4 times per week about. I have tried to stop but that part of me seems to control me and i do it. if i don't i sometimes embarrass myself in public or at the gym. i want to stop but it is very difficult.

[Saul_Durian]

Lev 15:16-18

Masturbation is not a sin. Lust is, but not masturbation. You can say it is having sex with yourself, but it isn't and the bible is clear. If you have an emission...go take a bath.

And Marksnet, there is an unforgivable sin. Mark 3 and Mathew 12


Also, for some reason my font is stuck in italicized font. Well of course it was til I said something...but I still can't change the rest of my post. Don't worry about, I'm not worried.

[Dogma]

Masturbation, as long as not in excess, is perfectly normal and healthy (as it reduces the chance of prostate cancer).

[youngnazarene]

Points well-taken. Still, if it becomes a problem, as in something that controls you instead of the other way around, you should probably stop. Masturbating to porn is definitely wrong. I guess we draw our own boundaries the closer we draw to God. Only in Him do we have true freedom.

[xxjaycx1]

Although masturbation is not mentioned still it requires a fantasy so it is the flesh and lust is the motivation so yes it is bad.

I had this same problem what I did is just stop doing it and it helps when you do not allow your mind to wander and eyes because it all starts there.

You wont go to hell, but the Lord rather you have the victory over sin.

Do not let the flesh control you,let the spirit of GOD control you.

[GreenNnice]

Originally Posted by youngnazarene

Thanks to everyone who responded (yes, I realize this thread is a billion years old, but here I go).

Allow me to confront a few things.

Firstly, sex before marriage = heck to the no. That is sin. And if anyone tries to comfort you otherwise, remember 1st John 3:7-9, "Dear children do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil's work. No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God's seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God."

Secondly, Jesus never gave in to temptation of any kind, sexual temptation included. However, Jesus was fully man and fully God. Therefore, He faced sexual temptation head-on, just like any other human being, yet unlike the rest of us, He overcame it every single time. Don't forget His human nature. Cling to it the same way you cling to His Godly Nature.

Before I conclude, the reason I wanted to talk to guys only is because of the content, but if women are reading, I just hope you're not offended by the language; thanks for your input, it is truly appreciated.

I've realized that we are sexual creatures. But no, that is wrong. We are spiritual creatures inside of human shells. Our real bodies await us; when Jesus returns and sets things in their rightful places, fully redeemed, hopefully you and I will know what it's like to live anew in His Second Coming, new bodies and all, from Glory to Glory. Until then, it is our responsibility and honor to honor Him with everything, including our earthly bodies, and that should be the fruit of our love for Him, the spiritual product of our dedication to Him.

I figure if you are dishonouring God when you masturbate, don't do it. Yeah, that's how I feel, but that's not really an answer now, is it?

As creatures endowed with sexual needs and responsibilities, I do believe there is a time and season for masturbation. However, this day and age has turned many innocent curious boys into simply repulsive men, whose fantasies dive far and deep into the reaches of sin and death, allowing images to sink into the corners mind and lead us by the hand straight into hell's gates. In all honesty, I think the only way to "be in the clear" when you masturbate is to think about one day having a wife and pleasing her. Is that wrong?

At the end of the day, I don't think it's my place to talk to anybody about masturbation; it takes a mighty man of God to successfully undertake such a task. And if you're a Godly Christian man, who loves Jesus and His Followers, then when you do talk about masturbation to those of us who are younger and less mature, do so with a Godly Heart. We need your advice, as the Spirit would see fit to give it.

After more than two years of reflection, and after 24 years of being a guy, that's all I can come up with.

I love y'all! God bless you, my brothers and sisters...

------
I like this answer.
May God bless and lead you through ALL things in your life. Stay fast to Him. I am speaking to ALL my peeps. Do not judge, and, certainly don't condemn others of things that may not be great in their life, simply encourage them to every day follow God's way for them, for giving glory to God, great or small.

God's will for ALL of us is plan-specific, per Jeremiah 29:11, and, my fave, Psalms 139 . It, our lives, that is, are personal with Jesus and what you do should be done freely, withoit feeling shamed or guilty, if you have prayed wholeheartedly of things doing, things you do , good and bad, for God's ways are good, and, that is for ever true