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A
I have. But families have been the backbone of Christian assemblies since the first century and they pay most of the offering needed to run the assemblies plus provide stability to the assemblies and the vast majority of leadership. The bottom line is that families are good for the church and the church is good for families.
Singles are much more transient, pay far less in offerings, and don't commit as well overall to the day in and day out running of assemblies.
But they ARE important, I agree with you.... especially in this time of changing demographics when not so many are getting married anymore.
It's a very real challenge and I'm not sure how it's going to resolve. Many assemblies have vibrant singles groups and college/career groups with a ministry person full time for singles. That's good!
But smaller assemblies or assemblies whose membership is mostly boomers and seniors are falling way short with respect to singles in my observations.
Do you go to a small church? What specific criticisms do you have and do you have any possible solutions? Love to hear from you.
Singles are much more transient, pay far less in offerings, and don't commit as well overall to the day in and day out running of assemblies.
But they ARE important, I agree with you.... especially in this time of changing demographics when not so many are getting married anymore.
It's a very real challenge and I'm not sure how it's going to resolve. Many assemblies have vibrant singles groups and college/career groups with a ministry person full time for singles. That's good!
But smaller assemblies or assemblies whose membership is mostly boomers and seniors are falling way short with respect to singles in my observations.
Do you go to a small church? What specific criticisms do you have and do you have any possible solutions? Love to hear from you.
I
I don't agree with you, maybe because my church is VERY different. We always have activities, trips, volunteer work that suits singles and others that suits families. We even have pre-marital courses every now and then that are run by professional people such as Christian counselors, psychologist and so on so forth that educate singles on how to live their lives now as singles and how their lives will be after being married from ALL the aspects that you can think of. 
Let me know which area do you live in n' I can guide you to one of our churches in the States as we have a LOT there. My church is a Coptic Orthodox missionary church.
Let me know which area do you live in n' I can guide you to one of our churches in the States as we have a LOT there. My church is a Coptic Orthodox missionary church.
Churches tend to be family focused, that is not entirely bad and not entirely biblical (especially when we define family as just the people with blood ties that live under the same roof as us). I've been living in Asia for the last year and a half and one of the interesting things about church and family here is that because getting married and having a family are so culturally important here, it is the church that really gives young people, especially women, any alternative to raising a family. So much so that some people ask why Christians don't allow marriage.
For the history of marriage and singleness in the church (and because it's just a really good book) I'll refer you to Singles at the Crossroads by Albert Hsu . I think you can buy and download it as an e-book. As far as what can be done, I think part of the problem is that many Western churches (and christians) operate on a consumer business model. One friend even once told me that he gave enough in the offering to cover his consumption of church services and that should be enough so why should he pay for additional expenses (in this case it was parking because the church rents a facility in town) at church functions. This model discourages real commitment and puts the pressure on the church as an organization to meet the needs of the attendees (while attendees expect to be served and catered to) or else they will take their business elsewhere. This isn't strictly true of all churches or christians, but I think it is a prevailing attitude especially among many new to church.
In creating a grouping of singles, the only common need they have is that they lack a spouse. There are some common struggles such as loneliness and the unavailability of a way to honor God and act on their sex drive while single, but they often have different careers, personalities, and lives. As a result even much of singles ministry and singles conversation in church is focused on marriage. While we need to acknowledge that most people get married (or at least spend significant portions of their lives in a romantic relationship), churches should not promote getting married as any sort of ultimate goal of life. Rather the best way churches can help and serve singles is to give them full participation in God's family and truly become the family that God has provided for them.
For the history of marriage and singleness in the church (and because it's just a really good book) I'll refer you to Singles at the Crossroads by Albert Hsu . I think you can buy and download it as an e-book. As far as what can be done, I think part of the problem is that many Western churches (and christians) operate on a consumer business model. One friend even once told me that he gave enough in the offering to cover his consumption of church services and that should be enough so why should he pay for additional expenses (in this case it was parking because the church rents a facility in town) at church functions. This model discourages real commitment and puts the pressure on the church as an organization to meet the needs of the attendees (while attendees expect to be served and catered to) or else they will take their business elsewhere. This isn't strictly true of all churches or christians, but I think it is a prevailing attitude especially among many new to church.
In creating a grouping of singles, the only common need they have is that they lack a spouse. There are some common struggles such as loneliness and the unavailability of a way to honor God and act on their sex drive while single, but they often have different careers, personalities, and lives. As a result even much of singles ministry and singles conversation in church is focused on marriage. While we need to acknowledge that most people get married (or at least spend significant portions of their lives in a romantic relationship), churches should not promote getting married as any sort of ultimate goal of life. Rather the best way churches can help and serve singles is to give them full participation in God's family and truly become the family that God has provided for them.
T
I don't agree with you, maybe because my church is VERY different. We always have activities, trips, volunteer work that suits singles and others that suits families. We even have pre-marital courses every now and then that are run by professional people such as Christian counselors, psychologist and so on so forth that educate singles on how to live their lives now as singles and how their lives will be after being married from ALL the aspects that you can think of.
Let me know which area do you live in n' I can guide you to one of our churches in the States as we have a LOT there. My church is a Coptic Orthodox missionary church.
Let me know which area do you live in n' I can guide you to one of our churches in the States as we have a LOT there. My church is a Coptic Orthodox missionary church.
J
you are almost right there,
Best option is get along with people(couples) with Large Christ given Heart in Church who accepts people irrespective of their background or status.Pray and God will Lead you to such.
Better stay away from majority of the family people because more trouble to get along with.So in all when you feel a little rejected just realize maybe God is putting you in such a state so as to protect you from families that have real probs inside which does not show up in sugar coated public-conversations.
Marriages or being a couple is harder than being single.Its not the other way.Better get that in your mind asap.So feel more privileged to be not entangled with unnecessary contacts.
God Bless
Best option is get along with people(couples) with Large Christ given Heart in Church who accepts people irrespective of their background or status.
Pray and God will Lead you to such.Better stay away from majority of the family people because more trouble to get along with.So in all when you feel a little rejected just realize maybe God is putting you in such a state so as to protect you from families that have real probs inside which does not show up in sugar coated public-conversations.
Marriages or being a couple is harder than being single.Its not the other way.Better get that in your mind asap.So feel more privileged to be not entangled with unnecessary contacts.
God Bless
J
Yes,it is.
But its not a real prob if the single person feels Jesus is with him/her as a Parent caring them 24/7.
Otherwise its a real prob why many go astray,because churches doesn't care about singles(who go awaywhich breaks God's Heart)since couples have an obligation and fear to be in 'churchish' environment because of the head ache of maintaining family.So couples must or should be well organized in church so as to maintain society status mostly.Its not about following God their but having God to be a provider.
Drawbacks:-
Lack of Love in general.
Selfishness.
Politics in church.
Zeal for God blown out(didn't get another appropriate term).
yup,its a serious prob that no one cares about, but Jesus does and that's why many don't perish and, get back to God.
But its not a real prob if the single person feels Jesus is with him/her as a Parent caring them 24/7.
Otherwise its a real prob why many go astray,because churches doesn't care about singles(who go awaywhich breaks God's Heart)since couples have an obligation and fear to be in 'churchish' environment because of the head ache of maintaining family.So couples must or should be well organized in church so as to maintain society status mostly.Its not about following God their but having God to be a provider.
Drawbacks:-
Lack of Love in general.
Selfishness.
Politics in church.
Zeal for God blown out(didn't get another appropriate term).
yup,its a serious prob that no one cares about, but Jesus does and that's why many don't perish and, get back to God.
T
I would have to disagree with the section that I bolded. The singles in my church have good jobs. They tithe, offer and also make themselves very much available to help plan and carry out weekly service, Sunday school and whole church activities.
However, when it comes to having gatherings for singles and fellow shipping with other church singles groups, seems like no one wants to allow this. I have had this problem for years andI am truely annoyed by it.
However, when it comes to having gatherings for singles and fellow shipping with other church singles groups, seems like no one wants to allow this. I have had this problem for years andI am truely annoyed by it.
I
You can call it an amazing thing Tintin. Typical any Coptic Orthodox church, we have a big number of single male and female people from all different ages, so the church does its best all the time to keep us engaged and that's how we grow up with strong relationship and connection to our church because it caters everything for us, so we know the church cares for us. We have Coptic Orthodox churches all over Australia if you wanna join, I can hook you up!!
Typical any Coptic Orthodox church, we have a big number of single male and female people from all different ages, so the church does its best all the time to keep us engaged and that's how we grow up with strong relationship and connection to our church because it caters everything for us, so we know the church cares for us. We have Coptic Orthodox churches all over Australia if you wanna join, I can hook you up!!
A
The Barna Group conducts research into American tithing and charitable giving and they state that:
"Several groups also stood out as highly unlikely to tithe: people under the age of 25, atheists and agnostics, single adults who have never been married, liberals, and downscale adults. One percent or less of the people in each of those segments tithed in 2007."
Only 1% or less from the 'single adults who have never been married' group consistently provide a percent of their income to a church!
It's not what you think, it's what you can prove.
"Several groups also stood out as highly unlikely to tithe: people under the age of 25, atheists and agnostics, single adults who have never been married, liberals, and downscale adults. One percent or less of the people in each of those segments tithed in 2007."
Only 1% or less from the 'single adults who have never been married' group consistently provide a percent of their income to a church!
It's not what you think, it's what you can prove
.
T
I've had both bad and good experiences with churches that are very family oriented. I've been told that I was unwelcome in the pastors office and if I wanted to talk to him I needed to come to his house and have discussions around his family. When I was in college I chose a family oriented church. I liked that it had a group for young adults (married or single), but there where also family that took in the college students and made us part of their families. There where several other churches that where mostly attended by young adults and singles, but I like the feeling of being apart of a family.
The Barna Group conducts research into American tithing and charitable giving and they state that:
"Several groups also stood out as highly unlikely to tithe: people under the age of 25, atheists and agnostics, single adults who have never been married, liberals, and downscale adults. One percent or less of the people in each of those segments tithed in 2007."
Only 1% or less from the 'single adults who have never been married' group consistently provide a percent of their income to a church!
It's not what you think, it's what you can prove.
"Several groups also stood out as highly unlikely to tithe: people under the age of 25, atheists and agnostics, single adults who have never been married, liberals, and downscale adults. One percent or less of the people in each of those segments tithed in 2007."
Only 1% or less from the 'single adults who have never been married' group consistently provide a percent of their income to a church!
It's not what you think, it's what you can prove
.
If anything I would say singles (especially childless singles) have the ability to serve the most and be the most reliable since they don't have family concerns to compete with serving the church. I won't say they always are, but I think they have that ability if they so choose.
A
The ones using statistics to "lie" as you put it are organizations with a vested interest in twisting statistics to sell whatever it is they are selling or accomplish whatever objectives they have predetermined to accomplish.
The Barna Group isn't twisting polling methodologies or results to present a false picture so your assertion that they are is false.
The Barna Group isn't twisting polling methodologies or results to present a false picture so your assertion that they are is false.
Allow me to rephrase since it was not my intention to discredit the Barna Group whose studies I know are well regarded. Let us say that this is a case of misunderstanding or misinterpreting statistics. When only a small proportion of singles are involved in churches then it is reasonable to assume that only a small portion of singles would be practicing behaviors commonly associated with being part of a faith community. This does not however give us conclusive evidence that those singles involved in a faith community are any less likely than married couples or families to perform those behaviors, we would need a study limited to only church goers to get that information.