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You know what I look for?
Life. Does this person live or are they simply fulfilling their duty and obligations. Are they doing what they ought to do or what moves them?
Courage. Can they be vulnerable and overcome their doubts with courage or does shame and fear overwhelm them?
Individuality. Do they seek to fit in or do they seek to step out? Is their ambition to be apart of the group and normal, or to show the world what really moves them, even if it means doing it alone?
Faith. Can they follow God when everyone else around them seems bent on doing something else. Do they have a faith of their own and not a cut and paste trendy faith of buzzwords and going through the motions?
Truth. Are they willing to seek out the truth, no matter where it is found or who it challenges? Can they live with themselves as a coherent and honest person, even unto themselves?
Empathy. Can they understand what is wrong with an animal or what it needs, or a child or another person? Can they suspend judgement and extend love out of empathy for the plight of someone else?
K
I think Christian stereotypes has made it harder for guys to ask girls out. All these books about ''being careful not to date a Jezebel'', or ''you will end up marrying the girl you go on a first date with'' create so much expectation. The same with girls. We are told that we are princesses that deserve only the best, and that a man must prove his worth even before the first date. Yeah, we do have worth because we are God's possession and I'm not saying don't use wisdom but....sometimes a date is just a date, and the best way to get to know someone is to get to know someone.
I personally think guys should just ask a girl out and not overthink it. Hopefully you have already detected a few qualities in the person you're interested in and you're not asking just because you saw a pretty face, but because you want to find out if those qualities you think you saw are really there . And girls shouldn't be so dramatic about a date. Nor should we be jerks if we are not interested in dating someone. Be civil and use wisdom. It is my personal conviction that all a girl can do is show interest somehow, and if the guy is already interested he will notice.
I personally think guys should just ask a girl out and not overthink it. Hopefully you have already detected a few qualities in the person you're interested in and you're not asking just because you saw a pretty face, but because you want to find out if those qualities you think you saw are really there . And girls shouldn't be so dramatic about a date. Nor should we be jerks if we are not interested in dating someone. Be civil and use wisdom. It is my personal conviction that all a girl can do is show interest somehow, and if the guy is already interested he will notice.
I don't ask anyone out unless I see myself as spending the rest of my life with them, I haven't asked anyone out in awhile!
As far as showing interest, I think simply inviting a guy somewhere, laughing at his lame jokes, and giving him sincere compliments about what you do like, will show your interest non-weirdly.
C.
As far as showing interest, I think simply inviting a guy somewhere, laughing at his lame jokes, and giving him sincere compliments about what you do like, will show your interest non-weirdly.
C.
M
I look for a pulse. That one is pretty important.
As for the serious reply. I look for a genuine woman. Someone I get along with well and see potential with. Generally I will already know the attraction is there, but I look for something deeper. There isn't a real set list of must haves but obviously Christian and God fearing is one of those things that is a must. There are also many qualities which are endearing but not always necessary.
I also don't really mind if a woman is bold enough to make the first move. Sometimes those signals are just lost on me and I need a little extra helping hand.
As for the serious reply. I look for a genuine woman. Someone I get along with well and see potential with. Generally I will already know the attraction is there, but I look for something deeper. There isn't a real set list of must haves but obviously Christian and God fearing is one of those things that is a must. There are also many qualities which are endearing but not always necessary.
I also don't really mind if a woman is bold enough to make the first move. Sometimes those signals are just lost on me and I need a little extra helping hand.
IMO, you're right on with that one. Have you ever noticed when a squirrel is run over in front of the church, some women will cry for it, though few will pray or cry for one in their midst dying of cancer? I think empathy for others without respecter of persons is a very high quality indeed. Good post.
Based on what how things have gone with the girls I have asked out in the past, I like for there to be a foundation of friendship there--to know we like spending time with each other and to be able to tell on a shallowish level that we are compatible. Also, I obviously need to be attracted, not necessarily just physically but to her as a whole person. If those things are in place, then I begin looking for a good opportunity to ask her out.
I had a fellow CC female member tell me, "Shy and introverted guys are the ones you really want, because they are often humble and will make great fathers". But these shy and introverted guys will have a hard time initiating conversation with a woman.
Not because they are bad, or something is wrong with them, but because it often comes with being humble and intelligent. They don't want to hurt your feeling or appear creepy. And this doesn't mean they won't be assertive if their children are being bad later on, and doesn't mean they won't take charge, and doesn't mean they are weak.
With shy and introverted guys, the lady really should do something to make it pretty clear that she is interested.
P.S. Finding them on a dating website, and hitting "like", or "flirt" or whatever is a good idea. That recently happened to me with someone I know in real life, and it was very nice. I actually kind of like her back, but did not want to appear creepy, and now this made it a lot easier.
Not because they are bad, or something is wrong with them, but because it often comes with being humble and intelligent. They don't want to hurt your feeling or appear creepy. And this doesn't mean they won't be assertive if their children are being bad later on, and doesn't mean they won't take charge, and doesn't mean they are weak.
With shy and introverted guys, the lady really should do something to make it pretty clear that she is interested.
P.S. Finding them on a dating website, and hitting "like", or "flirt" or whatever is a good idea. That recently happened to me with someone I know in real life, and it was very nice. I actually kind of like her back, but did not want to appear creepy, and now this made it a lot easier.
I agree with you. I would like to make a friend first before asking someone out. If she politely declines, then it will not ruin the relationship and things will be back to normal.
I think it depends on an individual's social quotient. My hypothesis is that men who are extroverts are more likely to pick up the signals than those who are introverts.
I think it depends on an individual's social quotient. My hypothesis is that men who are extroverts are more likely to pick up the signals than those who are introverts.
E
I know some girls want to wait until the guy pursues her. But if I like someone, and he appears suitable, I am not patient. My motto is: life is short, ask a guy out 
This should be triple liked kool
sometimes the guy dose not know that the girl is interested we are so caught up in tradition that the guy should make the first move this is easier said than done