My family are pushing me too hard

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Rosesrock

Guest
#21
#21
Children obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. My youngest daughter is 14. I have also kept people away from her that were creating havoc in her life. I'm sorry you are uncomfortable but your moms responsibility is to keep you safe a d raise you to make good decisions. Not to make you happy. :) hang in there. You all need to communicate and work this out.
 
W

WRITER

Guest
#22
#22
yes it is too much
you do not deserve punishment
you deserve love and forgives
and again believe
 
W

WRITER

Guest
#23
#23
yes it is too much
you do not deserve any kind of punishment
you deserve love and forgives
and again believe
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#24
May 21, 2016
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#24
She is just going too far, but the advice I have received here is encouraging me to try and be good, but I am worried she will never trust me again.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#25
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
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#25
Fran123 said:
She is just going too far, but the advice I have received here is encouraging me to try and be good, but I am worried she will never trust me again.
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Then make a real effort to do the things you should, and don't give her another reason to not trust you. Trust is earned, not given..
 
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perlcookwriter

Guest
#26
#26
Fran, I tend to agree with blue_ladybug. It is not a punishment. Your mom is trying to protect you. Being young you really can't know about the dangers as well as she can. It doesn't matter how serious your mistake was, it matters if you were on the wrong path. Because whatever path you are on will become more significant and important as time goes on.

I completely disagree with Demi and I think you should try to think of this as an opportunity. You don't have to know if you want to be Christian right now, you just have to decide if you want to head toward the right or the wrong. If you understand that you made a mistake and shouldn't do it again then that is a great start. Having better influences around you will make it much easier to prevent stupid mistakes in the future.

I understand it must be really hard having your world turned upside down. Just try to keep going and think about the positive. And people like us are here to cheer you on if you need it. : )
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#27
May 21, 2016
176
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#27
It is too hard. I am really trying to be good but its hard.
 
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perlcookwriter

Guest
#28
#28
Do you need help with anything in particular?
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#29
May 21, 2016
176
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#29
I just wanted to hear what people thought and everyone seems to think I should just do as I am told
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#30
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
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#30
Fran123 said:
I just wanted to hear what people thought and everyone seems to think I should just do as I am told
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If you're looking for us to tell you "do what you want", then don't hold your breath because NO ONE here will tell you that. The bible says obey your parents, and that's exactly what you need to do. It's hard to do what's right, because the devil is tempting you. Resist him and he will flee from you. :) As perlcook said, you have no clue about the dangers of being on the wrong path, but your mom does. She was probably on her own wrong path when she was your age. It will not harm you to make new friends, and it will not harm you to have to wear a uniform at school. And it definitely won't harm you to do what's right and what your parents tell you. :)
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#31
May 21, 2016
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#31
So whatever they do they are right and I am wrong?
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#32
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
9,601
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#32
Fran123 said:
So whatever they do they are right and I am wrong?
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Sometimes. Not always. :) But they ARE your parents, and they're trying to get you in a better situation. No offense but you make it sound like wearing a uniform, making new friends, and being put on the right path, is the end of the world. It isn't. It's probably different than what you're used to, because you sound like you're used to doing whatever YOU want to do. But this too shall pass, the bible says so. :) And in the long run, you will be alot better off for having endured an irritating situation.. Life is full of irritating things, and this is yours. Chin up and bear it with grace, instead of complaining about it. :)
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#33
May 21, 2016
176
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#33
I think I have a right to complain. All my old friends think I am weird and I haven't got any new ones.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#34
Feb 21, 2014
70,869
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#34
Fran123 said:
I think I have a right to complain. All my old friends think I am weird and I haven't got any new ones.
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Give it time. You won't make new friends overnight, but it WILL happen. Put more energy into making new friends, and use less energy complaining about it. And it doesn't matter what your old friends think of you. It's what GOD thinks of you that matters. :)
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#35
May 21, 2016
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#35
Not very much the way He is letting them ruin my life.
 
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perlcookwriter

Guest
#36
#36
Fran don't you understand the whole "wrong path" thing? I know it has got to be hard. Emotionally stressful right now. Maybe it even felt like a nightmare at one point. I know from experience. But that will pass and you will get to feeling better about life especially and perhaps only if you try.

I think it would be good for you to take a look at it through a different window - get a different perspective. We're all seeing the same hard situation, just, differently.

Perhaps the hardest thing you need to realize is that you've got yourself stuck in complaining. Maybe because you don't know where to go. It'd probably be embarrassing to suddenly turn around at this point. But it's okay. You can do it and it's not as hard as it seems.

You might really appreciate this qoute:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." - Marianne Williamson
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#37
May 21, 2016
176
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#37
I think I understand what you are all saying and I see that I needed to change. But not so much. And just because Mum is mu mother doesn't make her right.
 
Fran123

Fran123

Senior Member
#38
May 21, 2016
176
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#38
And I am now going to bed, at 8.30. So not fair.
 
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perlcookwriter

Guest
#39
#39
Yeah but what is the alternative? Rebelling against EVERYTHING your mother says? And seriously what did you expect with the new bedtime. You didn't even go to bed at 9:00 last night.

I don't mean to come off as mean or anything I just want you to figure it out. It might help for you to take a few days and think about it before deciding what you think.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#40
#40
Fran123 said:
My family, and especially my Mum and my sister, are giving me a really hard time.

I sort of messed up a few months ago, did some really stupid things which could have been really serious, and my Mum just freaked out.

So now I have changed schools (all girls, no boys) and we are all going to church every week and I am taking extra classes and bible study. I mean Mum and my sis always have, and I did when I was younger, but this is a new church and I don't really get a choice right now.

They have changed everything about me. My friends, my clothes, everything. I mean, I joined her cos it is just about the only place I am allowed to come online because our Pastor recommended it.

I'm sorry for what I did and I have learned from it, and I deserved some punishment, but this is too much, don't you think?
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Breaking trust often comes with Huge consequences and a long time of proving you deserve to be trusted again. It's a consequence you bring on yourself by the choices you make. Clearly you hurt you mom deeply and broke her trust, so this is what it means to do so. You'll have an easier time working at proving you are trustworthy than feeling you are being treated unfairly. Chances are your mother felt she was mistreated by you more than you feel about her.
 
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