Friend in trouble! Advice please :)

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pockets14

Guest
#1
#1
I have a best friend and have been friends for 6 years now. We are both Christians and recently went to this camp in Florida in the summer that caused us to serioulsy chase after God. Well in September she started dating a non christian. He believes in God but he thinks God hates him. He cusses every other sentence.... stuff like that. Before they started dating i warned her to witness to him... to show him Gods love before she got serious. but she started dating him a week later. I was angry at first and i let her know nicely and we got over it. But know her boyfriend is changing her. She cusses to my face. she says "Oh My god" alot. She skips church. I have confronted her about the cussing and it has slowed down a bit but me and my other friends are worried and dont know what to do. we plan on confronting her (not all together but seperatley) but we are lost and just want to do whats best for her.
Any Bible verses or words of advice would be great!
Thank you so much! :)
 
N

ness

Guest
#2
#2
Okay, this tends to happen often sadly. To be honest, if you all start talking to her about how to act, the difference she is acting in, etc. she will push you all away. I know you care for her and want the best but she may be blind at this point, giving she still loves God I am sure but maybe at a cross roads. If i were you I would start by inviting her to church again telling her how much God is helping you or reminding her of what God has done for her. Also, keep praying for her player always helps. To the boyfriend part, you can't tell her who to date, once she starts to set her eyes on Christ she may break up with him or maybe he will change if she does again, pray for him also.

I hope i helped. Just my though :)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#3
#3
Chances are this 'relationship' will not last. Teen relationships are notorious for being short lived. My suggestion is to keep loving on her, letting her know shes still accepted with you and the group. Keep inviting her to church. One day soon this relationship will end. She's going to then see the mistakes she's made. And she'll either look at you guys and feel attacked and condemned and not return to you, or she'll feel that even when she was down she was still loved on and accepted, and she'll actually learn from this.
The likelyhood that you can talk her out of this while she's still dating him is slim and will likely only cause her to resent you, perhaps even after they break up. And when she comes back to you guys, be sure to skip the 'i told you so' and just let her know you're glad she's back and still there for her. She will likely already know you were right and she was wrong and won't need to hear it.
 
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pockets14

Guest
#4
#4
Thank you both!
First, I guess I have been trying to choose who she should date without really knowing. I have grown up to not date a non christian just to change him. So I tried to force that view on her.
Me and my friends do love on her it's just been going on so long that we are sick of her attitude. I will be sure to remember to love on her more andto tell my other friends to be more positive. Thank you! :)
 
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Aqua_Girl09

Guest
#5
#5
To me its seems like the best way to get through to her is to treat her like shes a new person to christ. like you're trying to win her soul for the first time. keep showing her the love of God through your actions. keep sharing the Gospel with her just like you would any one else and pray for her. If you're really worried pray for her. She'll come back. it might not be for months or even years but she'll remember God's love and you showing her the way makes it THAT much more easy.

another way of getting to her is witnessing to her boyfriend. if you can change him which seems to be the bad influence you might get to her as well. >_^
 
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pockets14

Guest
#6
#6
Thanks so much :)
 
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jdarling

Guest
#7
#7
You should remind her how she behaved before. Also to show her verses in the Bible that might help her. I think that you all should comfront her at one time it might work out better.
 
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Aqua_Girl09

Guest
#8
#8
DON'T COMFRONT HER! that might be the biggest mistake you can make. if you've alreay told her about her behavior and she hasn't change then everyone coming at her at once is only going to make her get defnisive and run away. even if she knows shes wrong you think she just wants to admit it? she doesn't have to confess anything to you. just Jesus. Just let her know that you're a friend and that you're there for her when she needs it but attacking her is only going to make her run away. that kinda thing might work for an older person who is a leader in the church. but shes only going to see it as a bunch of kids ganging up on her. if that happened to me i promise i'd never come back to church and totally stop talking to the people that came at me like that.
 
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Aqua_Girl09

Guest
#9
#9
talk to her yes. tell her shes wrong yeah. but don't go blaming her and acusing her even if you know shes done wrong.expesially not as a group. God will dicipline her, you just need to show his love.
 
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pockets14

Guest
#10
#10
Thanks I didn't plan on attacking her... Just correcting her when she cussed or say oh my god. It's just hard seeing her be completely different than who she used to be. I appreciate the advice :)
 
S

Seraphotic

Guest
#11
#11
Btw, before I read it again, do t say you know how a relationship will turn out, I've seen many people proven wrong bc they thought they knw how teens act.
But odds are in favor of the relationship ending, but she may lead him to god when she comes back , if she does the relationship MIGHt continue Alik longer. Most girls are notorious for changing drastically for a guy and hating that thy did it afterwords...
 
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kewl42

Guest
#12
#12
let her date who she wants to. god won't hold it against her. it does not affect him is her boyfriend is "less christian". it's none of your business either. only god has the right to interfere, not you. and at that, chancer are, he will let the relationship take its natural course. your friend has a lesson to learn.
 
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