My inward struggle: It's hard to believe others struggle with this too

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myoceanrat

Guest
#1
So back in 7th grade when I was 12 there was this new boy who came to the school, and I liked him a lot. Four months into the first semester, I left the school. After nearly a year and a half of not seeing him, I lost my feelings for him. After a year and a half, I went to youth group and I saw him again, and my feelings for him came back. I came back for the last few weeks of youth group for the wrong reason: merely to see him again. Then came this big event which you may or may not know about called Future Quest - Reign. I saw him there every day, and I hate to admit that I stalked him. I sat behind him every time a speaker was talking, practically. After future quest was over, I heard that my youth group was going to meet on Tuesday nights now. So i went to youth group again on Tuesday night, but he wasn't there, and I have this bad feeling that I might never see him again. I know that if i don't see him for a long time again then i will loose my feelings for him, but i despise that feeling of loosing. i have a strong relationship with God and have asked him many times to remove my love for him or something..... Help, I don't know what to do!
 
Sep 8, 2012
4,367
58
0
#2
Trust that God isn't denying you or your feelings.
We all go through infatuations at your age, it's quite normal.
It doesn't mean the boy is the one for you, and it doesn't mean he isn't.
Just trust that time and life's circumstances change dramatically.
So your feelings are not a barometer of God's grace or plan for your life.
People change, God stays the same.
 

starfield

Senior Member
Jun 13, 2009
3,393
58
48
#3
So back in 7th grade when I was 12 there was this new boy who came to the school, and I liked him a lot. Four months into the first semester, I left the school. After nearly a year and a half of not seeing him, I lost my feelings for him. After a year and a half, I went to youth group and I saw him again, and my feelings for him came back. I came back for the last few weeks of youth group for the wrong reason: merely to see him again. Then came this big event which you may or may not know about called Future Quest - Reign. I saw him there every day, and I hate to admit that I stalked him. I sat behind him every time a speaker was talking, practically. After future quest was over, I heard that my youth group was going to meet on Tuesday nights now. So i went to youth group again on Tuesday night, but he wasn't there, and I have this bad feeling that I might never see him again. I know that if i don't see him for a long time again then i will loose my feelings for him, but i despise that feeling of loosing. i have a strong relationship with God and have asked him many times to remove my love for him or something..... Help, I don't know what to do!
I understand it is difficult but try to focus on other things and separate yourself from the object of your infatuation (i.e. stop stalking him). The feelings will fade over time. :)
 
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Chezz

Guest
#4
Be in prayer about it! And your only 13! enjoy life!! :)
 

Lucy68

Senior Member
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
22
0
#5
It is normal for a young person to become rather obsessed with a romantic interest in someone. I remember those days well! If you lose that interest while not seeing that person, I think it means that it isn't a 'real' attachment.

And you're right...you should go to youth group to strengthen your relationship with Christ :). Pray to Him for wisdom and guidance.
 
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A_Silent_Gnome

Guest
#6
It really sounds like your just watching the guy... meaning that your feelings are based off lust.

I mean if all you do is watch him and have feelings. Yeah, you don't want to go down that path.

Also, your 13 years old. When I was around that age I decided to hold back dating until I turned 18. And I'm 25 now and I'm really glad I did that because the truth is... your gonna change and mature a lot when you get older. Your not gonna make the best decisions at your age... and that includes boys. All you should focus on is growing in the lord and learning more about him. Learning what values to have even more, and then when your older and more mature, you'll make better decisions on boys.
 
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myoceanrat

Guest
#7
Ok, thanks everyone! :)