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Again I'll sum up the situation before I address my current issue. I'm barely 18, I've been friends with a christian girl my age for 4 years and have grown to like her very much. In July of 2013 she was raped and will have a baby girl this April. I still feel the same way despite the devastating circumstances.
I initially thought my parents liked her but were dismayed by the circumstance and felt I should distance myself from her to keep from looking like the father, which I agreed was acceptable and did, but as the due date approaches they have directly told me the choice to pursue her will ruin my life.
She is a stronger Christian than I am. She did not grow up in the faith and has a rough past, but she made a decision to follow Christ about 5 years ago (before we met) and that's just what she's done. That did not remove her from her troubled family and friends, which is where this terrible event took place.
I was handed the faith by my parents and for a long time my "Christianity" was so so. I have never in my life taken it more seriously than this past year, seeking every opportunity to further and strengthen. But I still feel like someone who was not raised with these beliefs and who has family members actively discouraging her from continuing in it yet grows stronger each day is a ... better ... Christian than I am. (I am aware there is no hierarchy)
She has tatoos. And supports them. They are not offensive, they are not satanic, they are simply things she enjoys and knows she will for the rest of her life. Tatoos are a part of the culture she was raised in. Just as beards are an acceptable appearance alteration in some families, tatoos are in hers. I don't know what to think about that, I personally wouldn't have. But I do not think it is against God's word.
She has a rough history, it's evidenced on her body and by her future child. But she has an incredibly strong faith and continues to grow in it. The faith part is what I am focused on thinking long term. The rest is really not important to me. It's a Jeremiah 29:11 and Romans 8:28 issue. She seeks Him and He has promised to work all things together for her good.
This is not the case with my mother or father. They see her tatoos and look at her family and view her as "a temptation sent from the devil to cause you to stumble". In all honesty this would be the one thing that could do it right now but I have prayed for days straight and it has not been revealed to me that this is the case.
I don't know what to do. I like this girl. She's in a tough spot right now with the baby. My parents don't like her because they haven't taken the time to get to know her and they judge her on superficial grounds. I would have a steady job and a house of my own before I considered marrying her but my parents wont hear that, they think I'm going to run away with her tomorrow and they want her completely out of my life. I understand and respect them and they are probably right, but I don't know how to tell any of this to the girl without hurting her.
I am so lost. I just keep praying. It's all I can do.
I initially thought my parents liked her but were dismayed by the circumstance and felt I should distance myself from her to keep from looking like the father, which I agreed was acceptable and did, but as the due date approaches they have directly told me the choice to pursue her will ruin my life.
She is a stronger Christian than I am. She did not grow up in the faith and has a rough past, but she made a decision to follow Christ about 5 years ago (before we met) and that's just what she's done. That did not remove her from her troubled family and friends, which is where this terrible event took place.
I was handed the faith by my parents and for a long time my "Christianity" was so so. I have never in my life taken it more seriously than this past year, seeking every opportunity to further and strengthen. But I still feel like someone who was not raised with these beliefs and who has family members actively discouraging her from continuing in it yet grows stronger each day is a ... better ... Christian than I am. (I am aware there is no hierarchy)
She has tatoos. And supports them. They are not offensive, they are not satanic, they are simply things she enjoys and knows she will for the rest of her life. Tatoos are a part of the culture she was raised in. Just as beards are an acceptable appearance alteration in some families, tatoos are in hers. I don't know what to think about that, I personally wouldn't have. But I do not think it is against God's word.
She has a rough history, it's evidenced on her body and by her future child. But she has an incredibly strong faith and continues to grow in it. The faith part is what I am focused on thinking long term. The rest is really not important to me. It's a Jeremiah 29:11 and Romans 8:28 issue. She seeks Him and He has promised to work all things together for her good.
This is not the case with my mother or father. They see her tatoos and look at her family and view her as "a temptation sent from the devil to cause you to stumble". In all honesty this would be the one thing that could do it right now but I have prayed for days straight and it has not been revealed to me that this is the case.
I don't know what to do. I like this girl. She's in a tough spot right now with the baby. My parents don't like her because they haven't taken the time to get to know her and they judge her on superficial grounds. I would have a steady job and a house of my own before I considered marrying her but my parents wont hear that, they think I'm going to run away with her tomorrow and they want her completely out of my life. I understand and respect them and they are probably right, but I don't know how to tell any of this to the girl without hurting her.
I am so lost. I just keep praying. It's all I can do.
