Boyfriend will not accept that I want to remain a virgin?

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T

Tintin

Guest
#21
1/3 of the people in this world are Christians I just heard it on the history channel and that's around a billion of people.
Okay, but the History Channel shouldn't be one's measure of truth or facts.
 
H

Halocandy

Guest
#22
Ok I'm going to give this to you straight so don't be offended I'm just being honest to fellow sister in christ but are you serious why In the world would get into a relationship with somebody who doesn't have the same morals or standards as you. but I'm not going into that cause your already in it but have you ever thought abt this him forcing you to have sex with him is more than enough reason in itself not to. Cause it means he doesn't even respect you enough to accept your no and after its over you'll feel really crappy knowing that not only did you disappoint god but all over some hormonal teenage boy who will probably still end up leaving you anyway. Best advice break up staying is not really an option at this point cause sounds like its getting dangerous and he could rape you trust me he can live without you and if he says he can't tell him to talk to a guidance counsler if he needs help.
 
S

SabbieWabbie

Guest
#23
Virginity is the best gift you can give to your husband, and to your marriage.
Don't give a boyfriend the benefits of a husband. Best of all, if one day you marry and have children you can walk your talk to your daughters.
A good Christian man will seek to save your purity, not compromise it. This man you want to one day marry is not showing leadership qualities, so I am not sure how you expect him to lead you. Leave the relationship, pray for him and let God make a man out of him before you make a husband out of him.
 

Crazyteen

Senior Member
Aug 11, 2013
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#24
I am eighteen, and have chosen to remain a virgin until marriage. I have been dating my first boyfriend for six months, and he does not accept that I want to remain a virgin until I am married. I suggested waiting until we were in a situation where we were ready to get married, but he says no. He has become very rough with me and keeps pushing me to go farther than I want to sexually. I am scared to leave him because he says that he cant live without me etc. etc. but I don't want to have sex with him, and lately it feels like our relationship is all about that.

What does everyone think? Should I loosen up like he says? SHould I leave him? What do I do?
If he can't respect you now, he will do it even less later.
If he can't live without you he has "lovers " syndrome and needs to be cured by reading the bible more often. :)
 

maxwel

Senior Member
Apr 18, 2013
9,261
2,386
113
#25
1/3 of the people in this world are Christians I just heard it on the history channel and that's around a billion of people.
Brandon,
Bible study lesson #1: Ignore anything you hear on the history channel.
 

NateDaGrimes

Senior Member
Jan 7, 2013
445
4
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#26
I'm pretty sure there aren't billions of Christians on the earth, there are only 7 billion people in the whole world. There may be hundreds of millions of Christians though.
to be fair, I am pretty sure 35% are only true christians. Not a lot of people behave like they should as they confess
 
T

Tintin

Guest
#28
to be fair, I am pretty sure 35% are only true christians. Not a lot of people behave like they should as they confess
Good point but I don't like percentages when there's no concrete data for such things.
 
D

Dayen

Guest
#29
You are precious to the world and the blood of christ is more precious that the cant buy a drop but you have a piece in you that the world had not pls protect it with all you have
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
41,243
16,252
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Tennessee
#30
End this relationship now or you will seriously regret it. Take some time to get to know who you really are or want. Go to a bible believing church, and pray for God to provide you with suitable friends and guidance. Take your time!
 
A

allylovessummer3

Guest
#31
Leave him and wait for someone that respects your choice. Never make a decision out of guilt.
 
B

blessedbeyondmeasure

Guest
#32
Almost 3 years ago I was in your situation. I am 19 now, I was 16 then. Dating my first boyfriend, a guy I'd grown up with and loved for forever. Sadly though, he only wanted to sleep with me. He kept talking about it, pressuring me, getting more touchy ect., even though I'd told him over and over and over again that sex wasn't an option until marriage. Finally, I just got tired of him pressuring me, and I was afraid that I'd lose him otherwise. So I did the unthinkable...

Almost 3 years later, I am a single mom with a 2 year old little boy at 19 years old.

I wouldn't trade my son for the world! He is what God used to open my eyes to where I was headed. I love my son more than anything (other than God), but I DO NOT recommend the path I chose for anyone else. It's hard for the baby that's brought into the world, and it's hard on the teenager and the family of the teen.

If you sleep with this guy, you may or may not get pregnant, but I can guarantee one thing... Waiting for your marriage bed and The One that God has for you is worth it!!! You may say, "How do you know it's worth it? You didn't wait." I know because, sleeping with someone before marriage is SO NOT WORTH IT!

You know the right thing to do. If you thought that sleeping with this guy was a good choice, then you wouldn't have asked anyone's opinion... you would've already done it.

Hope this helps. I'll be praying for you!
-C
 

Elizabeth619

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2011
6,397
109
48
#33
He is trying to manipulate and guilt you into something you don't want to do. Get away from him. If he is doing it now it will only get worse. If you give in he will think he won and continue to treat you worse. Get away from him.
 

penknight

Senior Member
Jan 6, 2014
811
26
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#34
He could just be abusing your feelings to get what he wants. If he doesn't care about how you feel you should dump him.
 
O

oldernotwiser

Guest
#35
well dear (i can call you dear because i'm 75 years old) this really isn't about virginity. it's about power and respect. the actual virginity issue is minor, we often confuse virginity with purity and that is sometimes a serous mistake. what is important is your commitment to being a virgin when married and his respect for that commitment. if you should accept his demands and (i personally wouldn't expect this) married. you will find yourself yoked to a man who has no respect for your deepest feelings. it doesn't sound like a good life ....... run
 
Feb 21, 2014
5,672
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#36
I am eighteen, and have chosen to remain a virgin until marriage. I have been dating my first boyfriend for six months, and he does not accept that I want to remain a virgin until I am married. I suggested waiting until we were in a situation where we were ready to get married, but he says no. He has become very rough with me and keeps pushing me to go farther than I want to sexually. I am scared to leave him because he says that he cant live without me etc. etc. but I don't want to have sex with him, and lately it feels like our relationship is all about that.

What does everyone think? Should I loosen up like he says? SHould I leave him? What do I do?
Why should what he wants matter?

Honoring the Lord Jesus in our lives is what really matters, and it sounds like this is not a priority for your bf. God's way is best.

If he treats you this way even now, what would a lifetime with him be like?
 
Feb 1, 2014
34
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#37
You deserve and should find someone better.

Physical intimacy between husband and wife is beautiful and sacred. It is ordained of God for the creation of children and for the expression of love between husband and wife. God has commanded that sexual intimacy be reserved for marriage.


When you are sexually pure, you prepare yourself to build a strong marriage and to bring children into the world as part of a loving family. You protect yourself from the spiritual and emotional damage that come from sharing sexual intimacy outside of marriage. Remaining sexually pure helps you to be confident and truly happy and improves your ability to make good decisions now and in the future.


The Lord’s standard regarding sexual purity is clear and unchanging. Do not have any sexual relations before marriage, and be completely faithful to your spouse after marriage. Do not allow the media, your peers, or others to persuade you that sexual intimacy before marriage is acceptable. It is not. In God’s sight, sexual sins are extremely serious.
 
Feb 1, 2014
34
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#38
perhaps I should have said you should try and help him understand the importance of remaining pure prior to marriage and then if he doesn't agree find someone better...
 
B

blueorchidjd

Guest
#39
Yeah to what everyone said above.
I will also say this
Even if he is a 'good guy' and may even respect you, he may not even be realizing that he is manipulating you.
He is most likely not on your level, and you are most likely unequally yoked.
When it comes to a situation that generally goes against the moral background of what are to's and what not to's of your faith, or what can get in the way of your walk with Jesus , it is not worth exploring.
Curiosity may have its own itch to be scratched but in the end it will be only distracting and it is important to remember that God's will and word never compromises itself.
Once you become one flesh, you will feel a bond with him that won't go away even if you break up with him, a bond that is only for husband and wife.
Rip the band-aid, you will be grateful that you did six months from now.
 
M

MidniteWelder

Guest
#40
I am eighteen, and have chosen to remain a virgin until marriage. I have been dating my first boyfriend for six months, and he does not accept that I want to remain a virgin until I am married. I suggested waiting until we were in a situation where we were ready to get married, but he says no. He has become very rough with me and keeps pushing me to go farther than I want to sexually. I am scared to leave him because he says that he cant live without me etc. etc. but I don't want to have sex with him, and lately it feels like our relationship is all about that.

What does everyone think? Should I loosen up like he says? SHould I leave him? What do I do?
Ask God to strengthen you.
Try to Firmly look him in the eye
And tell him no, like you mean it.
Sexual intimacy is a gift you give to the one you are dedicated to the rest of your life.
Your partner in life. The one you marry.
Your BF wanting that gift now and not respecting God nor you is selfish on his part.
This shows that if he is leading you at all he is doing so selfishly without your best interest at heart.
And if he is leading you in this manner, what Path is your boyfriend leading you down?
I remember my high school sweetheart guilted me into sex.
She was a virgin and I wanted us to wait but after time I guess desire overcomes.
She said if I didn't give it to her she would find someone else who would.
Even if she said it jokingly, it still weighed on my mind.
I like Adam, gave in because I loved her.
Being dedicated to God the creator is more important than to the created though.
I learned my lesson, and the next time a girl played that game (said basically the same thing)
I told her go ahead and do it if that's the way you want to treat yourself, then broke up with her.

Don't compromise your Godly morals for another person
Don't feel as if you're hurting their feelings for standing up for God.
It is actually them who is hurting a follower of God by the enemy using them to get to the believers.


God Bless, remember love don't make a sin right.
you can be an example for other women now and in the future.
:)