Teen struggling with homosexuality.

[Gerlinde]

If I understood you correctly (English is NOT my native language); so you're gay, do not want it to be. I was transsexual, and am no more after surgery and the changes in the documents.
I grew up in the Mormon Church to a cult that claims to be Christian, but is unchristian. There I had my CO. Previously I had been struggling for decades against my feelings. I made two suicide attempts had depression, and picked up the alcohol (and felt guilty because of the Word of Wisdom). After my second suicide attempt (I had swallowed pills and alcohol), I realized I was transsexual, nothing and no one can change that, and I have to live with it. I was married and the father of two children. I wanted to put neither marriage in jeopardy, nor lose my children.
But I lost both, and won much more.
For the woman in me could not be further displace, even with medication and psychological tricks do not (a beard grow). And so I told my wife one day. We got divorced, and I could see my children ever again. I was excommunicated from the LDS, and was not allowed to talk to anyone in the LDS.
I went my way. Now I am free of depression, happy and have no more thoughts of suicide.
God loves me as I am, and he does not care if I heterosexual, gay or a Martian.

One more thing:

Someone mentioned the book of Romans, according to which homosexuality is "unnatural". The Greek word for this is "Para-physin", and it means that someone is going against their own nature. So for example, if a heterosexual male is operated homosexual. What is the gay man "naturally" (Greek "physin"), is unnatural for the heterosexual man. By the way, Paul also spoke here about pagan temple rituals and the turning away from God, and not to make self-inflicted capital to a god. This will clear any village idiot who reads the entire chapter (best in ancient Greek).

 

[Gerlinde]

The Bible Does NOT Condemn Homosexuality — The NALT Christians Project

I realize that just about 100% of you will totally disagree with anything I say on the matter since I'm gay. but that's what the website is for. I spent a long time feeling the same way, that homosexuality was struggle. but god loves all of us and he created us this way. it's ok to be who you are.

Totally agree. God is not the small-minded bean counters than fundamentalist Christians would like to see him. God is love. God is love. And God judges us, not ask who we were in bed; but if our life was honorable and good. Better to be a gay man, who is an upright Christian and compassionate, as a self righteous and bigoted fundamentalist, where you have to look for the charity with a magnifying glass!

 

[nicknack100]

Totally agree. God is not the small-minded bean counters than fundamentalist Christians would like to see him. God is love. God is love. And God judges us, not ask who we were in bed; but if our life was honorable and good. Better to be a gay man, who is an upright Christian and compassionate, as a self righteous and bigoted fundamentalist, where you have to look for the charity with a magnifying glass!

I'm not interested in someone's opinion whose life is not devoted to God. Correct, God is not small minded, infact He has a bigger mind than anyone.
"God judges us, not ask who we were in bed" that's so sad you think that, as Christians we should include God in EVERY part of our lives, especially our sexual lives.

 

[Gerlinde]

I'm not interested in someone's opinion whose life is not devoted to God. Correct, God is not small minded, infact He has a bigger mind than anyone.

Nick, this attitude of yours is exactly the attitude that makes it difficult for people to argue with Christians. Am I a Christian? I do not know, I'm looking for. Do I believe in God? I think I do.
And I agree with you that the mind of God is far greater than the mind of all the people together. Only I noticed that most fundamentalist Christians do not know the Bible. You pick up some quotes out of context, and then boldly claim that God would word, ignoring the textual and historical context, let alone the original words.

"God judges us, not ask who we were in bed" that's so sad you think that, as Christians we should include God in EVERY part of our lives, especially our sexual lives.

I agree with you even partially. Surprise!
God does not mean that we are unfaithful. God wants us above all we are honest with him, our neighbor, but even opposite.
You're gay, so what? Where is there a problem, so long as you do with yourself and others deal honestly?
The BIBLE didn't condemned homosexuality per sé, It saw h. in every verse in connection with shrine prostitution, slavery and pederasts. If you have the chance, please read the "Dictionary of the New testament", published by Kittel (standard work for Christian Pastors) about 1. Corintians and 1. Thimothy (about the original meaning of arsenocoitesa and malokoi).

 

[nicknack100]

Nick, this attitude of yours is exactly the attitude that makes it difficult for people to argue with Christians. Am I a Christian? I do not know, I'm looking for. Do I believe in God? I think I do.
And I agree with you that the mind of God is far greater than the mind of all the people together. Only I noticed that most fundamentalist Christians do not know the Bible. You pick up some quotes out of context, and then boldly claim that God would word, ignoring the textual and historical context, let alone the original words.



I agree with you even partially. Surprise!
God does not mean that we are unfaithful. God wants us above all we are honest with him, our neighbor, but even opposite.
You're gay, so what? Where is there a problem, so long as you do with yourself and others deal honestly?
The BIBLE didn't condemned homosexuality per sé, It saw h. in every verse in connection with shrine prostitution, slavery and pederasts. If you have the chance, please read the "Dictionary of the New testament", published by Kittel (standard work for Christian Pastors) about 1. Corintians and 1. Thimothy (about the original meaning of arsenocoitesa and malokoi).

If you're not Christian and only think you believe in God, what right do you have to say what God wants? unless you've read the Bible and understand it you have no right to make judgement on what God wants.
And just so you know, I never take scriptures and say them without knowing the context, if I see a scripture that I find interesting or that I'll use as reference/debate I'll ALWAYS look it up and read the chapter and surrounding scriptures to understand the context.
And no, what makes it difficult to argue with Christians is other people's lack of understanding of the Bible and who God is.

 

[Mo0448]

I'm not interested in someone's opinion whose life is not devoted to God. Correct, God is not small minded, infact He has a bigger mind than anyone.
"God judges us, not ask who we were in bed" that's so sad you think that, as Christians we should include God in EVERY part of our lives, especially our sexual lives.

I would have to agree with Nick here Gerlinde...and I do so with the upmost respect in terms of your personal view point. You are making a claim that God is Love and that God is not a small minded bean counter...however its so much more than "who we are in bed with" as you claimed. Suggesting that if our life is honorable and good...yet you are choosing which parts you are "honorable" & "good" with are you truly being honorable and good? Or are you being those things based on your own standards? So with your rationality, if I am addicted to drugs or alcohol, or have a pornography addiction it doesn't matter as long as I live a life that is honorable and good? Do you see the contradiction in your statement? How can one live honorably and good if they are not submitting every part of their lives to God but only selectively choosing the ones to submit to God? Christ never told us to selectively deny ourselves and pick up his cross to follow him...we either walk with God or we don't...there isn't a half way Christ following...

While I do agree that God is not a small minded bean counter...the scriptures say we are going to be held accountable for all we do while we are living on earth...and claiming that God will Judge us except with who we are in bed with, is honestly in my viewpoint creating a justification to continue to sin...


I'll use myself as an example since well I'm a sinner like everyone else out there...I have had a problem with pornography and whenever I fall short It really gets me down because I know for a fact that if I am giving in to my own flesh desires I'm putting MY DESIRES above God's which is selfish and prideful...now if I said well I'm an honorable and good person but I just have this problem here God isn't going to care about...I'm basically creating a justification and slowly burning away my conscience and desensitizing my spirit to the sin that I am committing...now what's easier...continuing to sin or to fight the temptation to sin and instead reach out to God? The former is easier sure...but Christ never told us that following him would be easy...

 

[nicknack100]

I would have to agree with Nick here Gerlinde...and I do so with the upmost respect in terms of your personal view point. You are making a claim that God is Love and that God is not a small minded bean counter...however its so much more than "who we are in bed with" as you claimed. Suggesting that if our life is honorable and good...yet you are choosing which parts you are "honorable" & "good" with are you truly being honorable and good? Or are you being those things based on your own standards? So with your rationality, if I am addicted to drugs or alcohol, or have a pornography addiction it doesn't matter as long as I live a life that is honorable and good? Do you see the contradiction in your statement? How can one live honorably and good if they are not submitting every part of their lives to God but only selectively choosing the ones to submit to God? Christ never told us to selectively deny ourselves and pick up his cross to follow him...we either walk with God or we don't...there isn't a half way Christ following...

While I do agree that God is not a small minded bean counter...the scriptures say we are going to be held accountable for all we do while we are living on earth...and claiming that God will Judge us except with who we are in bed with, is honestly in my viewpoint creating a justification to continue to sin...


I'll use myself as an example since well I'm a sinner like everyone else out there...I have had a problem with pornography and whenever I fall short It really gets me down because I know for a fact that if I am giving in to my own flesh desires I'm putting MY DESIRES above God's which is selfish and prideful...now if I said well I'm an honorable and good person but I just have this problem here God isn't going to care about...I'm basically creating a justification and slowly burning away my conscience and desensitizing my spirit to the sin that I am committing...now what's easier...continuing to sin or to fight the temptation to sin and instead reach out to God? The former is easier sure...but Christ never told us that following him would be easy...

This is so true, it says in the Bible for us to submit to God, to give our lives to Him, not to selectively choose which parts of our lives we will devote to Him and leaving other parts out.
I put God's desires above my own, it literally says in the Bible that homosexuality is a sin, and sin is as humans what we innately see sin (or the feeling we get during sin) as pleasure, but it says in the Bible that God knows our hearts, we knows our desires and He has plans for us, plans we can't even comprehend, being with God will give you a life of blessing, of course you won't constantly be on the top of the world, but God will get you through everything, so I put God's desires above the pleasure of sin for God is worthy of all honour and praise.

 

[Gerlinde]

@ Mo & Nick,

When God distributed intelligence, you were probably both in the basement? Otherwise I can not explain your statements.
For someone you can not be both a Christian and gay. For you, homosexuality is a sin; although the Bible does not say that clearly! On the contrary. The Bible does not speak of homosexuality as we understand it today, but of pederasts and their catamites (in pagan temples or private). Luther had it translated correctly. Oh heaven if my English would be good enough to make you understand what the Bible on this subject (and other topics) says. But unfortunately English is not my native language, and as a child I was too lazy to learn foreign languages. Here is a small suggestion for thought. It comes from a German Bible dictionary, and I tried to translate it with the help of google:

What do the keywords μαλακοί (malakoi) and α̉ρσενοκοιται (arsenokoitai)? (see 3.3.) (...)
Liddell / Scott are for μαλακός (malakos) as the basic meanings "soft", "tender", "youthful looks," "mild" or even "gentle" to (Liddell / Scott, 1076f). In this sense μαλακός should particularly supple 11.8 Mt in identifying, ie comfortable clothing meant to be. Only in a broader sense μαλακός also has a pejorative meaning, which can be represented as "effeminate" in German and in an ethical sense, "unsettled in view of morality and self-control" means (see FIG. Liddel / Scott, 1077). Sexual connotations can be tapped only with the help of another context. The unsafe use of the word carries a note in Dionysius of Halicarnassus in mind. A certain Aristodemus is called μαλακός and we do not know whether it is referring to the fact that he was effeminate and let themselves be used as a wife, or that he was fine and mild (Dion. Hal. Antiquitates Romanae 7.2,4). Men who feminize contrary to all decency, be at pseudo-Lucian described with the verb μαλακτίζεσθαι (malaktizesthai) (Pseudo-Lucian Erotes 19). Philo, the passive μαλακά (!) Complementary to the active παιδεράστης (paiderastēs) against (Phil. Spec. Leg. 3.37 to 39). The positioning of μαλακοί (malakoi) in 1 Corinthians 6.9 between adulterers and α̉ρσενοκοιται (arsenokoitai) could suggest a negative documented sexual meaning (Hasitschka, 54). Robert Scoggs thinks of male, but womanly prostitute (Scroggs, 64). This results in the following range of meanings: a) μαλακός means someone who is supple and well maintained; b) μαλακός is a morally questionable weakling; c) μαλακός is a husky man with female attributes that violates gender conventions; d) μαλακός is a man who does not meet the required duty to be active or does not have the social power of this, and has to use up.

Far more unusual than μαλακός (malakos) is the other term, α̉ρσενοκοιται (arsenokoitai), which is perhaps to be a neologism created by Paul. John Boswell looks with α̉ρσενοκοιται (arsenokoitai) originally meant only male prostitutes, more precisely, men who have sex in general, and not specific forms of same-sex behavior. N In the 4th century. BC. It was been a shift in meaning of the term was now "antigay" (Boswell, 350-353). Closer probably a derivative of Lev 18:22; Lev 20:13 (LXX) are: μετά ά̉ρσενος κοίτην γυαικός (meta arsenos koitēn gynaikos). Thus, Paul sets the Holiness Code as at least implicit normative instance ahead here and confirmed it in his argument. Frequently μαλακός (malakos) is the passive partner, α̉ρσενοκοίτης (arsenokoitēs) to the active part in the male sex-related (so Stegemann, 1993, 271). However α̉ρσενοκοίτης (arsenokoitēs) is too general, the term does not allow clear conclusions on practices (consent, coercion), and age (male, teenager) to. Martin Hasitschka therefore translated convincingly suggested: "one who has intercourse with men" (Hasitschka, 54).

Source: Lexikon :: bibelwissenschaft.de

These two words can thus have different meanings. Few have a sexually explicit background.

 

[Gandalf]

@ Mo & Nick,

When God distributed intelligence, you were probably both in the basement? Otherwise I can not explain your statements.
For someone you can not be both a Christian and gay. For you, homosexuality is a sin; although the Bible does not say that clearly! On the contrary. The Bible does not speak of homosexuality as we understand it today, but of pederasts and their catamites (in pagan temples or private). Luther had it translated correctly. Oh heaven if my English would be good enough to make you understand what the Bible on this subject (and other topics) says. But unfortunately English is not my native language, and as a child I was too lazy to learn foreign languages. Here is a small suggestion for thought. It comes from a German Bible dictionary, and I tried to translate it with the help of google:
Source: Lexikon :: bibelwissenschaft.de

These two words can thus have different meanings. Few have a sexually explicit background.

I explained to you yesterday that you are manipulating God's word to try and accept your own sinful desires.

 

[Gandalf]

This is so true, it says in the Bible for us to submit to God, to give our lives to Him, not to selectively choose which parts of our lives we will devote to Him and leaving other parts out.
I put God's desires above my own, it literally says in the Bible that homosexuality is a sin, and sin is as humans what we innately see sin (or the feeling we get during sin) as pleasure, but it says in the Bible that God knows our hearts, we knows our desires and He has plans for us, plans we can't even comprehend, being with God will give you a life of blessing, of course you won't constantly be on the top of the world, but God will get you through everything, so I put God's desires above the pleasure of sin for God is worthy of all honour and praise.

The brave but correct answer...

 

[PennEd]

@ Mo & Nick,

When God distributed intelligence, you were probably both in the basement? Otherwise I can not explain your statements.
For someone you can not be both a Christian and gay. For you, homosexuality is a sin; although the Bible does not say that clearly! On the contrary. The Bible does not speak of homosexuality as we understand it today, but of pederasts and their catamites (in pagan temples or private). Luther had it translated correctly. Oh heaven if my English would be good enough to make you understand what the Bible on this subject (and other topics) says. But unfortunately English is not my native language, and as a child I was too lazy to learn foreign languages. Here is a small suggestion for thought. It comes from a German Bible dictionary, and I tried to translate it with the help of google:
Source: Lexikon :: bibelwissenschaft.de

These two words can thus have different meanings. Few have a sexually explicit background.

I don't care what translation or language you want to use. This NEW TESTAMENT verse is Waterford Crystal clear on God's view of homosexual sex.

Romans Chapter 1 verses 24-26:
[SUP]24 [/SUP]Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, [SUP]25 [/SUP]who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
[SUP]26 [/SUP]For this reason God gave them up to vile passions. For even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. [SUP]27 [/SUP]Likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful, and receiving in themselves the penalty of their error which was due.



PLEASE repent of your sin and accept Jesus Christ. He alone can free you of this lust.

 

[ThomistColin]

Glinde,

You are right on a single point here. That homosexuality, meaning the homosexual person, is not a sin. However, God clearly condemns homosexuality, the acting upon abominable desires by deed or thought, as a sin. People are not sins, their actions are.

As for a lot of people here who haven't dealt with MTF or Transvestites, they are often not homosexual. Most MTF still find women attractive and FTM find men attractive.

While we in the Church may believe homosexual deeds and transvestitism or cross dressing sinful, don't lump them into the same sin. It's like saying, "MURDERER!!!!" and the person responds, "I just lied that's all." Don't accuse of sins that are not involved.

 

[Garfield20]

well now that i am 21 guess i cant post here anymore 20 is still kinda a teen lol

 

[Mo0448]

unfortunately I do not think Gerlinde will see our viewpoint since it appears they've accepted their own viewpoint as true...I made the claim that as Christians we need to love the sinner and not their sins...having a tendency to a certain sin is very different than living in that sin or committing it...I don't claim God condemns homosexuality any more than any other sin, I do claim however that being predisposed to a certain sin is one thing, being oblivious to that predisposition being a sin is an other thing entirely...how many people are predisposed to violence or alcohol or drugs? Those that I know that are homosexuals generally use the same counterargument where they were born that way etc and they should embrace who they are...I counter with the thought that yes we are born a certain way we are born into sin as the Scriptures say, we have a sinful nature that's who we are...but when we accept Christ as our Lord and Savior we are CHOOSING to embrace Christ's nature over our own...may we still have urges to fall back on our nature? Sure that's just who we are...however the more we embrace Christ's nature the more it becomes our own. I really wish there was more I could do to help you Gerlinde...it just seems you are convinced in your ways and want to justify them as a means to continue to live in them...I pray that you find your way back from that.

In Christ
Mo

 

[nicknack100]

All we can do at this point is pray for Gerlinde that she sees the truth.
It is not up to us to decide which parts of the Bible are most important or what parts of us we are to devote to God, for nothing in scripture states importance of one part over another thus we must follow it all and devote all of ourselves to God.
Our sexual lives are paramount to devote to God, for it is a sin against your own body. Especially in this world that is so overly sexualised we must stay focused on God and put His plan, judgement and love over our own selfish desires.

 

[Elijah19]

Although I cannot speak for homosexual desires as far as personal experience is concerned, I can say this. No matter how tempting your trial is (be it spiritual, mental, or physical), God is infinitely greater. I myself might somewhat be able to sympathize with you in a certain respect. I was once addicted to porn and believed I couldn't break the habit. And guess what,... I couldn't...

GOD had to break it in ME. That's how victory is gained: Not through your own strength, but through Gods'.

I send my love and prayers to you, brother. Stay strong. It sounds like you are doing very well in your church activities and I would encourage you not to lose heart and stop, but to continue as you are doing... It really helped me. If you would like, message me later on the subject of pornography and I might be able to help you with that one. I've been given so much Grace (Not of myself) on that one. I might have some pointers.

 

[miracleforever]

I understand how you are feelin, I am struggling with it too. My advice to you is to pray and God will take of the rest. He loves you and doesnt judge you.

 

[1joseph]

For the past 5 years (18 in just over a month, so since I was 13) I've struggled a lot with homosexual desires, I've never given into any in real life, only online, but sin is sin. I gave my life to Christ when I was 14 and I'm the only Christian in my family so confiding in my Mum is not an option. I just find it so difficult to withstand this temptation, I've been 1 week clean from masturbation and pornography but I still get the temptations on a daily basis, I don't want to meet the woman of my dreams and still see men in that way. I do my schoolwork online/at home so shutting off my computer just isn't an option.
I pray A LOT about this although I haven't read my Bible for a very long time, I do go to church (A.O.G.) every Sunday and I love it, I also go to a weekly men's connect group meeting in my church aswell as church youth group every week so I'm not falling short on fellowship. What are some ways to overcome this? I don't want to have to deal with this for my whole life, my biggest fear is that Satan catches me when I'm most vulnerable and I don't reach out to God and I end out having sexual intercourse with another man.

nicknack, Pray for the Holy Spirit to control your thoughts, in Jesus' name. Praying in Jesus' name is where the power is.

I am very impressed with your handling of this desire at such an early stage in your walk with Christ. Continue staying close to other believers, especially since you have not been reading the Bible, to continue getting God's Word, which is imperative for any believer.

Since you "...want to meet the woman of my dreams..." you are not a homosexual. Homosexuals, at least the ones I have spoken with, have no desire for a woman. You are just a viral young man. As far as the "woman of your dreams," believe that God already has the perfect wife set aside for you. He will deliver!

"Heavenly Father, I humbly ask that you protect nicknack from the evil one, from fleshly desires that are impure, and give him the comfort of Your holy Spirit. I ask it in Jesus' name."

Keep fighting the good fight young man. God is with you.

Take heart:

1 Corinthians 10:13 (NIV)
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

James 4:7 (NIV)
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Joshua 1:5 (NIV)
No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.

God bless you and keep you in His care.

Your brother in Christ,
Joseph​

 

[Colorful]

To the OP:

I just wanted to say that I'm impressed with your abstinence. I understand you might be hard on yourself for acting on your desires online (as opposed to physically in the flesh with someone else), but that in and of itself says a lot about what you are capable of. This I can guarantee you: Be it by the Holy Spirit and/or your brute willpower and strength, it is 100% possible to never act (online or in the flesh) with someone of the same gender. Your desires, however, I cannot guarantee they will be removed.

I don't doubt the power of God or the power of prayer. Having said that, from speaking to over a hundred self-identified Christian kids with homosexual desires, the simple truth is that an overwhelmingly dominant majority of them STILL had homosexual desires after prayer, fasting, feasting on the word of God, etc... The Christian kids that were "purified by Christ" and supposedly lost their homosexual desires... ultimately and mysteriously have their desires reoccur (sarcasm). I am not God, and so I will not speak for him and tell you that you WILL get rid of your desires. Frankly, no one here should either... It's not our place to promise you such things without authority by God to do so. I don't mean to sound so pessimistic about the possibility (probability) that you will continue to be tempted by your homosexual desires, but I'd rather you be prepared for that as opposed to believing in possible false hope.

God works in ways we don't understand. Because of this, he might have a plan for you to perpetually fight to stay clear from your desires. Maybe you learn something or grow because of your obedience in forsaking your homosexual desires. Or, He very well may have plans to "cure" your homosexual desires after you Have sought him, been obedient to him, and asked for deliverance. No one here knows God's plan for you or what God wants you to endure.

My advise, ask God that his will will be done. Do the things we are commanded to do (or not do), and maintain your strength in forsaking those desires. If you fall down, get back up again. Strive for that personal and intimate relationship with the Savior Jesus Christ, and remember that if you give it your all, the atonement (Christ's sacrifice) covers us the rest of the way.

 

[Colorful]

Something else to consider: I want to switch this "removing homosexual desires" with something comparable that heterosexuals might "suffer" from.

When I get married, I will still be physically attracted to other women. I can pray and ask God to remove ALL attraction for any other female other than my wife, but I would doubt God removes that desire. This doesn't mean I "doubt" God, but rather I doubt that simply asking for something means it's either in God's will, or if it's not, God will somehow change His master-plan for me.

I can see the benefits of "suffering" from being attracted to other women than my future wife. It would require permanent maintenance with the Savior and my future wife (which is something we should do anyways). It would require me to pre-meditatively avoid scenarios that would otherwise be inappropriate to be in when it comes to people of the opposite gender. Even if there were absolutely NO benefit from my perpetual attraction to other females, I'm still called to be obedient to God's commandments. For this reason, lusting in thought, online, or physically would still be something that should NEVER happen... even if I never get "cured" of my attraction for other women.