The way to combat anger is to understand people do wrong and most of the time can't see it. They are still people and you should love them even though they are not making the big picture better.
It is to place living things at a higher importance than circumstance, you an try to push them to do whats right, but if they do otherwise, to not put so much investment in what the outcome is that you get angry and treat them badly, just like a mistake or less than informed decision you might have made, you would not want people to discount what you are because of, don't have so much steak in the outcome you hurt people because your not seeing what you wanted.
let's say a hypothetical person named reg was given instructions for the day, Get the person named rachael to the post office, do not let her get distracted, pick up your two friends, let one of them stop into the bar for a while, but make sure he and your other friend is at the fire you make tonight at 10 o clock. You go out, and find rachael, she is looking at a bush, you walk up to her and ask, what are you looking at? you do the thing with her get her to the post office, go pick up one of your friends, but he is busy trying to find something which is missing, you go in and, the place is messy, the house key could be anywhere, you reach down, find it, and get him in the car, and you go to your other friend's house, pick him up, he tells you about an event he wants to go to at 10 o clock tonight, and he wants to go to the bar first. You ride around, drop him off at the bar, he goes in, you and your friend go off and you mention having a fire and he likes the idea, says there should be drinks, you go pick up the friend at the bar, he's been offered a once in a lifetime deal from a business man he met, you tell him about going to have a fire, he says ok, then realizes the event he wants to go to, and declines, you and your friend try to convince him to come hang out instead, but he insists he only has an hour before he should head there, you ask him what he's going to, he says an outdoor concert by a band called "reject dismiss", there is gonna be a lot of partying and drugs and ready women at the show, and he wants to experience those things for the first time, You bring him to your place, spend time, build a fire, it starts to get late, and your friend suggests going out for those drinks, your other friend wants you to drive them to the bus stop, you ask your friend to stay, he refuses and says he can walk if you don't bring me. Remembering your instruction, you look around for a way to make him stay, you say, "what is your favorite drink, we can have it tonight if you stay with us," he refuses, and you are worried the outcome will be different than you want it to be, but there's no way to communicate why he should stay without going to a topic you'd rather not bring up. You decide to tell him, using the event's features to describe how thing could go wrong and how you know he should stay here, your other friend is stressing how late it is getting, and that is reinforcing your belief that your not wrong, because your friend wasn't given a timeline. he asks you if he could get any drink he wanted, you tell him yes, he agrees to stay, you all go to the store for drinks, it is 9:15, you get to the store, but your enemy has been watching, and is aware of every aspect of this story so far, and has gone in before you and hid the drink you want to use to get your friend to stay, you go to where it usually is and it is not there, the worker says they may be out, your friend says it is okay, you can hang out some other time, you want very badly to see what you've been doing come to completion, you start searching for a bottle of it hidden behind others. It seems impossible to find. You are getting very upset, and your friend is explaining how it is not a big deal, and has no concept of why you think it is, your getting angry, and you feel like just giving up and letting things go. You reach for the counter about to break some bottles in anger, and you in your head cry out for help, the answer that comes back to you is "I said do not anger" you collect yourself, and you look around at what is going on, you are angry at a friend for a reason he doesn't even understand, you are about to damage someone else's property, you are wasting time when you don't have long, and you are at risk of destroying the evening anyway, you decide you have tried, and what is going to happen is going to happen, and you start to ask your friend if he would still stay and your hand reaches in the bottles and grabs something, you pull it out instinctually and it is the drink you were looking for, you pay for it and the other drinks, get in the car and go home, while that was happening, your enemy was at your house, your fire was safe, but he got a person there to see your fire, and think it shouldn't be unattended, and has almost put it out, you get back, you realize, and have 15 minutes to build it up, you want to yell at the person who did it, but you remember he doesn't know what he did, so you go, and build it up as fast you can, the small stuff was catching as you were finishing the top, and you go get your friends, and they are at the fire at 10pm, reg's god appeared, hidden, and made the gathering more enjoyable, the drinks didn't go down until noticed, and you and your friends had a lot of fun. Afterward, Reg has it explained that if his friend went to the show, he was gonna get pressed against a wall by a fat guy on drugs and what was going to happen to him would be explained away as a culture initiation, and your other friend was gonna invite other friends who just got into smoking marijuana, and recently received a large bag of marijuana with refined drugs on it, and were gonna offer some to him. It was also explained to reg that his anger would have caused him to go to jail if he broke those bottles, and he would have broke the one bottle of the drink he was looking for in the process, meaning he came the closest to having the worst outcome somebody could have had that night, if he hadn't resisted his anger, he was told about what his enemy did to try to ruin things, he learned that his anger could not be trusted, how it could be exploited by the enemy, how even achieving an outcome for a specific thing should not make you break your commandments, and how anger could easily cause a person to do harm without need, cause even a person trying to do right to be the cause of wrong, damage your ability to do what one must, and how it can lead a person to be punished for breaking a commandment (jail this time). He also learned that even if his friend hd left to go to the concert, causing him to not fulfill what he was trying to do, that his instructions were to protect his friends, and if they chose not to accept the protection being offered, it was not his guilt even though it would have made him fail an instruction, so getting angry at them for a misdeed they could have done, would not be founded in what is righteous, because even though the instruction was placed on him, it was not standing to condemn him for failure, therefore nothing would have harmed him and he would have no right to be angry, even angry secretly, for people refusing help or doing wrong, there's no reason to be angry except with yourself. If you do wrong, but he even learned being angry with thy self if you do wrong, would only cause you to further harm yourself, without fixing the problem caused, and distracts you from repentance, leading you to cause only more harm, breaking a commandment in the process.
. I'm still struggling specifically with my anger. I want to be a blissful Christ follower but some things aggravate me so much I fall back to bad language, grudges, and ultimately distance from God. I'm aware I'm still human but how do I combat these feelings? I want to be full of love, happiness, I want my aura to emit Godliness, peace, a person who can be a role model. But I feel I'm never going to get there. Even though I'm new to these changes I want to learn how to over come these fall backs.