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Thread: I am tempted by a coworker

  1. #1
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    Default I am tempted by a coworker

    I work as a chef,and one of the waitresses appears to have a crush on me, and she is not being subtle. Ie. Flirting, asking if I'm single,my age, other things that go past a professional relationship.

    From what I understand, she is currently in a relationship with another man. I am currently happily single, but have always felt a bit insecure about my overall attractiveness to the other gender. I am also worried that I may never find that special someone, when the time comes.

    How do I maintain a friendly professional relationship with this woman, and still be godly and polite?

    PS. I am in no way considering taking it up with HR, as I think she's basically a good person, but just on the wrong track a little?
    Sweetmorningdew78 likes this.

  2. #2
    Zi
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Be honest and say you don't appreciate it because she is in a relationship.

    You shouldn't want that type anyway.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Tommy379's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I work as a chef,and one of the waitresses appears to have a crush on me, and she is not being subtle. Ie. Flirting, asking if I'm single,my age, other things that go past a professional relationship.

    From what I understand, she is currently in a relationship with another man. I am currently happily single, but have always felt a bit insecure about my overall attractiveness to the other gender. I am also worried that I may never find that special someone, when the time comes.

    How do I maintain a friendly professional relationship with this woman, and still be godly and polite?

    PS. I am in no way considering taking it up with HR, as I think she's basically a good person, but just on the wrong track a little?
    Why is she on the wrong track? Is there something wrong with you? She isn't obligated to the other guy if they aren't married.
    Willie-T likes this.
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    I know she's not legally obligated, but it does seem to be a serious relationship, and I don't want to be a cause to the end of a relationship

  5. #5
    Zi
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    But if she's in a relationship why would you be flattered that she's flirting?

    Do you think you'll invest time in her and she'll respect or honor it?
    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I know she's not legally obligated, but it does seem to be a serious relationship, and I don't want to be a cause to the end of a relationship

  6. #6
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    I only found out she was in a relationship an hour ago, up until then I was okay with her flirting.
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  7. #7
    Zi
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    OK so since then how do you feel about her character?
    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I only found out she was in a relationship an hour ago, up until then I was okay with her flirting.

  8. #8
    Zi
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    If you're comfortable then enjoy..


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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    A bit put off, but I still consider her as a friend,and a relatively good person.
    Zi likes this.

  10. #10
    Zi
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    No doubt she might be.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Crimson_Lark's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    She has no problem asking you personal questions. Ask her if she has a boyfriend. Then watch how she responds.

  12. #12
    Senior Member blue_ladybug's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    This is the best advice on this thread...

    Quote Originally Posted by Crimson_Lark View Post
    She has no problem asking you personal questions. Ask her if she has a boyfriend. Then watch how she responds.
    AuntieAnt and NoNameMcgee like this.



    Blue ladybug, fearless leader of the orange kitty battalion! She loves orange tabbies and is innocent as decreed by Pottersclay who states that Scripture says that all people who love orange tabbies are innocent. Truthtalk says that God created the world, and then He created wonderful orange tabbies. Joefizz has elected blue ladybug as captain of the brave orange kitty ​army!



    Quote Originally Posted by kaylagrl View Post
    ​ Orange kitties approve



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    Senior Member NoNameMcgee's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I know she's not legally obligated, but it does seem to be a serious relationship, and I don't want to be a cause to the end of a relationship
    she does not seem like wife material to be flirting while involved...

    i would suggest to be honest with her

    lay everything out on the table after you ask her personally if she is taken

    and if she is offended or suggests leaving her boyfriend for you... that shows her level of maturity and loyalty

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    Senior Member NoNameMcgee's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Crimson_Lark View Post
    She has no problem asking you personal questions. Ask her if she has a boyfriend. Then watch how she responds.
    didnt see this...
    good post

  15. #15
    Senior Member blue_ladybug's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Tell her to be a respectable girlfriend, and stop flirting with other guys. OR, ask her how many relationships broke up because of her flirting.. lol



    Blue ladybug, fearless leader of the orange kitty battalion! She loves orange tabbies and is innocent as decreed by Pottersclay who states that Scripture says that all people who love orange tabbies are innocent. Truthtalk says that God created the world, and then He created wonderful orange tabbies. Joefizz has elected blue ladybug as captain of the brave orange kitty ​army!



    Quote Originally Posted by kaylagrl View Post
    ​ Orange kitties approve



  16. #16
    Senior Member renewed_hope's Avatar
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I work as a chef,and one of the waitresses appears to have a crush on me, and she is not being subtle. Ie. Flirting, asking if I'm single,my age, other things that go past a professional relationship.

    From what I understand, she is currently in a relationship with another man. I am currently happily single, but have always felt a bit insecure about my overall attractiveness to the other gender. I am also worried that I may never find that special someone, when the time comes.

    How do I maintain a friendly professional relationship with this woman, and still be godly and polite?

    PS. I am in no way considering taking it up with HR, as I think she's basically a good person, but just on the wrong track a little?
    Well, there are people that tend to flirt naturally even when in a relationship and they honestly don't see it. I would ignore it, it is her personality and treat her like you would anyone else you work with....now, if she touches your behind or kisses you then by all means tell her it's inappropriate...other than that she is being nice and trying to make conversation
    I choose to honor God by inspiring people. How do you honor him?........

  17. #17
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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Maybe she isn't flirting but being overly friendly. The 2 get mixed up quite often, especially when someone is hopeful that someone is attracted to them.

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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    I think maybe she has no qualms what so ever about having more than one relationships.A lot of people think quantity over rides quality.

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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I work as a chef,and one of the waitresses appears to have a crush on me, and she is not being subtle. Ie. Flirting, asking if I'm single,my age, other things that go past a professional relationship.

    From what I understand, she is currently in a relationship with another man. I am currently happily single, but have always felt a bit insecure about my overall attractiveness to the other gender. I am also worried that I may never find that special someone, when the time comes.

    How do I maintain a friendly professional relationship with this woman, and still be godly and polite?

    PS. I am in no way considering taking it up with HR, as I think she's basically a good person, but just on the wrong track a little?
    Wow! A chef that's wonderful please post some of your dishes here





    I guess just be honest with her and tell her that you are not interest with her


    I guess you can handle it well you seem like a considerate and a respectful person



    God bless you ❤
    "You can measure your love for GOD by showing your love for others."





    "Smile more you look amazing when you smile" --Sweetmorningdew78

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    Default Re: I am tempted by a coworker

    Quote Originally Posted by Frontios1996 View Post
    I know she's not legally obligated, but it does seem to be a serious relationship, and I don't want to be a cause to the end of a relationship
    Then, don't be. Is she stronger than you, and is going to beat you up, or something if you don't go out with her? It's really that simple........... unless your real intent is just to let us know how irresistible you are.
    Tommy379 likes this.

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