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Christian Young Adults Forum

Young adults and silly people: post your topics here, and respond to others.

Thread: Apeirophobia - Fear of eternity

  1. #1
    Senior Member Sharp's Avatar
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    Unhappy Apeirophobia - Fear of eternity

    Hi friends

    I'm not sure if I still count as a young adult at 31 years old, but I certainly hope so!

    I've had a problem since I was about 10 or 11, which I've only recently discovered has a name - apeirophobia. I have an intense fear of the concept of eternity. It's so bad that I have to force myself not to think about it, by doing anything that will take my mind off it - the more distracting the better. Sometimes I lie in bed at night in mental agony with my heart beating fast, absolutely dreading the sheer amount of time that awaits me in the future. I have to get up out of bed and distract myself with something.

    I don't know if many Christians give this topic much thought - most of our focus seems to be on matters relating to this life and just getting to heaven. I'm not afraid of heaven - I am afraid of existing forever. The enormity of existing on an unending basis is something that I think most people's minds don't comprehend very well. For me, I think about it every single day and wonder what activities could possibly occupy my time for an eternal amount of time.

    I know what all of us know about heaven. It will be perfect. There will be no pain or sin. God will be there with us. But what will we be DOING? I feel guilty and sinful sometimes for being afraid of this. I of course want to be with God. I know that everyone lives forever - it's just that some people will live in heaven forever and some will live in hell forever. Sometimes I find myself wishing I was never born because of this issue. I wonder to myself whether never having being born would just be easier than living forever, and I find myself wishing that when I get to heaven I'll be able to just sleep after a while and not exist. How could we not get bored after a literally unlimited amount of existence? I hate to say it but I find myself not wanting to live forever.

    I've heard it said that heaven exists outside of time so the passing of time as we know it on earth will not happen. I can't comprehend how this would work and I'd love it if someone could explain it to me.

    If anyone else has been living with this problem I'd love to hear any advice, because there really isn't much on the internet about this, and I doubt that most Christian counselors would even know what the condition is.

    Thank you
    Sharp
    blue_ladybug likes this.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Pipp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Apeirophobia - Fear of eternity

    I'm sorry to hear of your fear. I've often tried to wrap my head around eternity and I just cant... it's to big to completely comprehend. I don't think you'll ever run out of things to do...if we praised the Lord for every blessing he's given us it would take all of eternity. God bless you...I pray God comforts your heart and mind so you can rest.
    TrustingGod4life likes this.
    If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.

    A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.
    Roald Dahl, The Twits

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Apeirophobia - Fear of eternity

    I agree, Sharp. I try to keep my mind off it as well. I don't even like to say words such as 'forever' or 'eternal'. Those words scare me more than anything.

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