...god? hmmm

[Akner39]

Okay, so for the part, idk year I have been trying to get a personal relationship with god. It ain working. Im startin to think hes fake or just dont like me. What kind of god would let me go without him for this long?.Im sooo tired of trying with him. I pray and pray and pray. I have changed everyhing but hes still not there. shouldn't i give up? I think so.

 

[Credo_ut_Intelligam]

I'm not sure exactly what you're looking for. But try immersing yourself in Scripture. The following quote explains in part my reason for offering this advice:

'Whenever I work my way into a narrative … the “I” that is “me” becomes increasingly like my picture of the implied author: I succumb—I begin to see as he or she sees, to feel as she feels, to love what he loves, or to mock what she mocks.’

As Poulet observes: ‘As soon as I replace my direct perception of reality by the words of a book, I deliver myself, bound hand and foot, to the omnipotence of fiction … I am thinking the thoughts of another.’ This means that all storytelling is implicitly didactic, and because it involves the reader’s imaginative involvement, powerfully so. Furthermore the images we derive from narrative become part of us, so that it becomes difficult to distinguish what we were before we read from what we have become through reading stories.

Anyone who conducts honest introspection knows that ‘real life’ is lived in images derived in part from stories. Though usually our imitations are not highly dramatic, especially once past adolescence, everyone who reads knows that whether or not we should imitate narrative heroes and heroines, we in fact do.​

Booth makes these points about fiction, and does not discuss in what way they apply to historical narrative. It is evident that historical writing makes a much stronger claim on its readers than fiction: this is what really happened and is important, is at least implied by every historian. Their heroes were real people, who actually did what is recorded, not the make-believe creations of novelists. Thus intrinsically history is a much more authoritative narrative than fiction.​

(Gordon J. Wenham. Story as Torah. 11-12)

In addition to the reasons stated above, it's also a good idea to read Scripture since that is God's communication to you and it is a means by which he sanctifies us (conforms us to him and draws us closer to him).

But as I pointed out to someone else a while ago:

God is a person. So naturally you get to know him (or "reconnect" with him) just like any other person. You talk to him, listen to what he has to say, spend time with his people (fellow Christians), and obey him.

Granted, God is a person unlike all other persons. But God is, so to speak, the archetypal person. So there are points of analogy, but also points of disanalogy. You can't touch God like you can touch most other persons if they are in your poximity. Most people focus on the disanalogy and get themselves really confused about how they know God. They'll think something like "But if I can't touch God how can I know him like other persons?!" Well you can't touch me either (or see me or smell me... which is your loss). But it doesn't need to be that complicated. The basic *way* you know God is the same basic way you know other persons.

And just like any relationship there are things which draw us together and things which draw us apart. Sin separates us from God. It's a wrench in the relationship. Sin doesn't just put us at odds with God relationally, it also puts us at odds with God epistemically. "Reconnecting" with God will involve dealing with that wrench. As you know, God has already dealt with this problem and you only need to respond appropriately to it.

From an epistemic standpoint, if you're finding it hard to believe, be like the father why cried out "help my unbelief" (Mark 9:24).

Just like with any person, we don't always "feel God's presence." Think about the people you met today. Did you get a tingly sensation each time you met them or interacted with them? I doubt it. As you read this (if you do) you and I are communicating. But I doubt I'm giving you a tingly sensation... I hope I'm not anyway.

I wouldn't be focused on working up feelings if I were you. If you had a wife and your love life started going dry it wouldn't do you much good to close your eyes, hold your breath, and try real hard to make the "love" sensation pop into you. That's not how it works with real people, so why think it's how it works with God? If you want to rekindle your love life, spend time thinking about the person, what you like about them, what they do for you, spend time with them etc.

 

[xJoe]

So many people say this but not so many people try.
Are you a born again believer? Did you accept Jesus Christ gift of salvation? If you are then you need to be faithful.
SIN will cut God off from you. Also if you have no accepted Jesus you are already cut off until you do.

 

[shemaiah]

In adition to what my bros said, God wants you to put Him first in your life. If you want to have intimacy with Him you must set Him first in your life, surrender everything to Him, read the Word and most importantly, live a life of passionate worship. Love,
Shemaiah

 

[KnightdeKhristos]

Do you know any Christians? If you do, perhaps it might be best to hang around them a bit and shadow them in order to see God working through them. Also, it might help if you had a Bible and received help reading and understanding it.

If you don't know any Christians, you should read the Bible anyway and search for help if you need it. The internet has many good resources on Christianity, which is something I used when I was a new Christian.

 

[KryeVenkor]

The Lord is compassionate, and when you cry to him for help, he will answer you.
The Lord will make you go through hard times, but he himself will be there to teach you, and you will not have to search for him any more.
If you wander off the road to the right or the left, you will hear his voice behind you saying,

' Here is the road. Follow it.'

You will take your idols plated with silver and your idols covered with gold, and will throw them away like filth, shouting,

'Out of my sight!'

Whenever you plant your crops, the Lord will send rain to make them grow and will give you a rich harvest, and your livestock will have plenty of pasture.
Isaiah 30.19-23

 

[TD14]

I'm not sure if i'm much help and ain't really sure if you rightly care about my input but here it is. Step back and look around you. Ponder to yourself is God in my life. It wasn't until i done that and when i stepped back i saw my life was full of pain, sin, and addiction. That being said looking at things like that don't fix the problem. It helps you see the problems. I guess what i'm saying is look at your life long and hard and if you have made changes and worked towards it then maybe God is in your life your mind just ain't letting you see it. That being said i want to make it clear, i'm no angel and not perfect. I still struggle with addiction but now have been 53 days clean. So this ain't coming from someone who has known God their whole life. I have a past, i have a story, and that past is what made me what i am today. So just try and step back and look at the whole picture. Hope that makes sense.

Dan

 

[JimM1228]

I'm not sure if i'm much help and ain't really sure if you rightly care about my input but here it is. Step back and look around you. Ponder to yourself is God in my life. It wasn't until i done that and when i stepped back i saw my life was full of pain, sin, and addiction. That being said looking at things like that don't fix the problem. It helps you see the problems. I guess what i'm saying is look at your life long and hard and if you have made changes and worked towards it then maybe God is in your life your mind just ain't letting you see it. That being said i want to make it clear, i'm no angel and not perfect. I still struggle with addiction but now have been 53 days clean. So this ain't coming from someone who has known God their whole life. I have a past, i have a story, and that past is what made me what i am today. So just try and step back and look at the whole picture. Hope that makes sense.

Dan

AMEN BROTHER.

 

[Timofree]

When I became a Christian I thought things would automatically become more easy. This has definitely not been the case, and Im learning to not just trust in what I feel, but what God says, which is much firmer to have as a foundation in your life!!!
There's nothing more important to get right then our walk with God, even as a non Christian, I never bought that this universe accidentally formed from an explosion of nothing, I just never had the faith to believe that. Despite every sinful fibre in me wanting to deny God!!!

I didn't grasp for years the importance of Jesus (possibly didn't want to grasp, so I could carry on sinning), so don't forget-
Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

 

[dmdave17]

Dear Akner39:

I hesitated to respond to your post because I'm not really supposed to be on this site, but your problem is so close to my own that I couldn't help it. I lost my earthly father at the age of 5 to a heart attack. I was raised by a mother who, although she loved me, was not into physical expressions of love. She was also somewhat into "I love you when a you agree with/obey me." As a result, I never really knew what it was like to experience parental love.

As such, I found it very hard to accept the fact that God loves me unconditionally. Even now, I sometimes struggle with the concept. I am constantly asking Him to transfer what I know in my head to what I feel in my heart, so I can truly experience his love through Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. But I can tell you unequivocally, HE IS THERE! I have many more years of experience to draw on, but when I look back on my life I can literally pinpoint the times when he intervened in my life; the night when I was 20 and totaled my mother's car, AND LIVED, when I was 45 and survived a bout with cancer, WITH NO LINGERING SIDE EFFECTS, etc., etc..

Keep trying! You will succeed! Like someone in a previous post, I would suggest that get deeply into Scripture. The more you read and understand, the more God will become "alive" to you, and the more you will be receptive to His voice. I am sure that He wants to establish an intimate relationship with you. I will close with some advice from Jesus Christ, found in the books of both Matthew and Luke, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened."

God bless you.