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Should I be scared my sons father will get 50% custody


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Noahsmommy

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I don't know what brought me to this site I think its all my friends saying to pray for the situation I am in...i'm 21 and I recently had a baby with someone who has hurt me for several years physically and emotionally. My whole pregnancy he did not want me to have the baby left voicemails saying to get an abortion to give him up for adoption but i just couldnt find it in me to do it.

anyways my sons now 2 months old and his father is pursuing joint custody...I'm scared for my sons sake that his father may be granted these rights..when my son was 2 weeks his father locked himself in a room with him and wouldnt give me the baby and screamed saying he wished i die and called me a bunch of vulgar names i got this all on tape so i plan to use it to my benefit. i dont know what ill do if he is granted custody and not supervised visitation ca
use icould see my son throwing a fit crying and his dad getting angry and hurting him.

worried.
 
I am so sorry you are going through this. Do you have a lawyer? If you guys are going it alone, you can still get free consultations from many lawyers and they can help you assess the situation. I went through a divorce this summer, but my ex moved 2 hours away and there's no way he could have gotten joint custody. I'm happy to help you talk over some things if you need. you can pm or email me.

*never come across as a basket case and speak in terms of "the best interest of the child" crying and thowing a fit or making too many opinions over facts won't help. remain calm....best interest of the child.

God bless...

things that matter for your question:
what state you are in
who your judge is
lawyer
 
also...definitely pray...just because he's a sperm donar doesn't make him a fit father. Him encouraging abortion is probably heresy and isn't going to matter. What will matter is if he's capable of providing equal care as you are. Some states/judges are more prone to award joint custody and they are doing it a lot more these days. Definitely pray. xWhat is supposed to be, will be.
 
I'm sorry you are in this situation. I can't imagine how stressful it must be. I pray that the truth will come out when the decision is being made as to the custody situation. It's really hard at times, but try to put your trust in God. He can be your strength if you allow Him and just know that the Lord is a GREAT God. He can and will do mighty things. I pray that you will be able to trust His plan for you and your baby! God bless! I truly hope everything works out for the best!


Keep praying :)
 
thank you so much i live in kentucky i havent pursued a lawyer yet but i know he saw an attorney today!
 
all your replys make me feel a bit more hopeful i need to keep in mind God will let what needs to happen happen.
 
I say this out of concern as you seem to be very concerned with what happens to your child:

I'm not quite sure what you mean by this
"God will let what needs to happen happen"
but God's will doesn't automatically come to pass. God doesn't allow some things and disallow other things, as that isn't His nature. He is bound by the laws He has made and He doesn't go against those laws (unless you need a miracle, but I need to study on that more so I can't say anymore about it).
Now, I don't know how much you know about God and how He works, so please excuse me if those are redundant and I'm just being persnickety :)

I don't know what God's will is concerning your child; but it seems to me by what you're saying He would want him in your care.

Be of good cheer, for God hears your prayers, and He will send help. There is hope in Him.
You are in my prayers.
 
I don't know what brought me to this site I think its all my friends saying to pray for the situation I am in...i'm 21 and I recently had a baby with someone who has hurt me for several years physically and emotionally. My whole pregnancy he did not want me to have the baby left voicemails saying to get an abortion to give him up for adoption but i just couldnt find it in me to do it.

anyways my sons now 2 months old and his father is pursuing joint custody...I'm scared for my sons sake that his father may be granted these rights..when my son was 2 weeks his father locked himself in a room with him and wouldnt give me the baby and screamed saying he wished i die and called me a bunch of vulgar names i got this all on tape so i plan to use it to my benefit. i dont know what ill do if he is granted custody and not supervised visitation ca
use icould see my son throwing a fit crying and his dad getting angry and hurting him.

worried.

With the recordings I think you will be fine. Trust that God will work out this for the best no matter what.
 
there is no way any judge in their right mind is going to give that man joint coustody until he passes an anger management class. it IS his son but there is already history of him being abusive AND your son is a child that too small to fun away from a bad situation. I understand you being nervouse cause i would be too for my own child but i can't understand why anyone would put a child in that kind of situation when there is another parent who is perfectly capable of taking care of him.
 
If the child's father is seeing a lawyer, you should too, especially if you receive legal documents. Don't try to handle this on your own. The recording is important. Don't let anyone have it except your lawyer.

There is a lot you didn't say. Important considerations that will come up in court:

Are you married to the father? divorced? separated?
Did you name the guy on the child's birth certificate as the father?
Is he supporting you and/or the child?
Do you have means to support the child?
Living arrangements for the child

PRAY for wisdom and protection for yourself and your child. God will honor your desire to be a good mother.