Take it, or leave it?

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To do, or not to do.

  • Do NOT give him the window of opportunity

    Votes: 2 40.0%

  • Relieve him of his responsibility either way

    Votes: 3 60.0%
  • Total voters
    5
S

Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#1
#1
A coworker of mine frequently asks me to cover some of his shifts at work. He does so, so that [most of the time] he can go out to party, get rounded, pick fights, etc. Basically, he wants to go have a good time.

Without throwing any of my own conjectures out there, I was wondering what fellow Christians here think of this scenario.

My main question/concern is this: Should I go with the flow and let him do what he's going to invariably do? Or should I refuse him the favor so that he sticks to his responsibility/obligation? Am I furthering/reinforcing his behavior - his debauchery, by acquiescing to take his shift(s)?

Any and all advice is much appreciated. :)
 
K

keep_on_smiling

Guest
#2
#2
As nice as it would be, we can't really control what people choose to do with their time. You can pray for them and even tell them what you think of such activities, but apart from that they are going to do as they please. Whether you choose to help him out or not, he is probably going to find another way to go about it.

As far as you covering for this coworker, I don't see how you would be responsible for his actions. I don't think I would see it as enabling him, but that is an interesting thought. If you don't feel the Lord wants you to cover for him then don't do it. Maybe you are feeling that since you are asking for advice :) If you don't have any particular feeling and want the shifts, I don't see a problem with taking them.

Pray about it and even pray for this person. :) The Lord could use you to work in your coworkers life.
 
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A

Aqua_Girl09

Guest
#3
#3
Um. . . . .like what Keep_on_smiling said, you can't really control them. um. . . . .i guess its a matter of IF you wanna work more hours. do you need the money or want to work that long? don't be a total push over and say yes just cause he asks. but you could try inviting him to church or try sharing your faith with him. little seeds grow into big trees ya know. >_^
 
Ritter

Ritter

Banned
#4
Jul 25, 2005
2,417
34
0
#4
The Strokes - Take It or Leave It - YouTube

I can imagine there would be other ways to handle the situation. Confront him and let him take the time off would be better than refusing and not explaining why. Just pray for wisdom and proceed accordingly.
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#5
Aug 2, 2009
24,580
4,269
113
#5
If you don't want to cover for him...then don't. Its as simple as that.
What he does with his time off the job is no one's business but his.
 
S

Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#6
#6
I think my dilemma was playing the "What If" game: What if he drives drunk and hurts someone on a night I cover for him? What if he takes something someone offers him instead of doing his job, because I agreed to take his place? He's a nice kid, to be sure. His focus is his social life, however, and I'd hate to feel responsible in part if he did something reckless to himself or someone else during a time he could have been in a secure, stable environment.

If you don't want to cover for him...then don't. Its as simple as that.
Click to expand...
Well, no, not quite. What I "want" is to make the right decision, which is what I'm trying to gain insight to.

What he does with his time off the job is no one's business but his.
Click to expand...
I agree with this in a philosophical context. Alas, as much as I like the kid, he makes his self-indulgence - and the consequences of it - quite known to his coworkers.

Much thanks to everyone for voicing their opinions!
 
zeroturbulence

zeroturbulence

Senior Member
#7
Aug 2, 2009
24,580
4,269
113
#7
Well if you think he is driving drunk then yes, definitely intervene in some way and knock some sense into him, but if he just likes to party a lot and isn't putting anyone in danger, that's his choice. There's nothing wrong with voicing your opinion to him either, just know that people don't like to be told how to live their lives.
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#8
#8
Siberian_Khatru said:
I think my dilemma was playing the "What If" game: What if he drives drunk and hurts someone on a night I cover for him? What if he takes something someone offers him instead of doing his job, because I agreed to take his place? He's a nice kid, to be sure. His focus is his social life, however, and I'd hate to feel responsible in part if he did something reckless to himself or someone else during a time he could have been in a secure, stable environment.

Well, no, not quite. What I "want" is to make the right decision, which is what I'm trying to gain insight to.

I agree with this in a philosophical context. Alas, as much as I like the kid, he makes his self-indulgence - and the consequences of it - quite known to his coworkers.

Much thanks to everyone for voicing their opinions!
Click to expand...
If that's the way he lives his life, then likely those kinds of things could happen to him, whether its when you cover him, or on a normal day off for him. He's already at risk no matter what you do.
 
H

Helloimandrewyo

Guest
#9
#9
My thoughts are he is a grown individual, and it's not really your job to be the parent. At the same time, partying costs money. Hard to get money if you are having all your shifts covered. When he realizes athat and starts working more, you may have a window of oppertunity to talk to him about why partying has to be a staple in his life. There is joy outside of bar fights and hangovers.

It's hard to believe, but its true...
 
S

See_KING_Truth

Guest
#10
#10
I'd just let him know, in love, that the kind of lifestyle he is taking part in eventually catches up with people if they stick with it, and the consequences are always negative. You can't control the guy, but you can warn him, and that should help relieve you from any feeling of responsibility or accountabilty should something bad happen. Also, just pray for him. All this being said, some people just have to learn from their own mistakes; and that person alone is responsible for their actions.
 
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VikkiKate89

VikkiKate89

Banned
#11
Jul 24, 2010
829
7
0
35
#11
Speaking as someone who doesn't know where her next meal's gonna come from half the time, let him go destroy his liver and enjoy the extra hours. Eventually that lifestyle will catch up with him and he'll learn the hard way.
 
N

ness

Guest
#12
#12
You can not change the way he lives, but if you are worried about him. Then do what you CAN do and show him his responsibility and keep him 'safe' at work. In a kind way just lay it out for him.:)
 
S

Siberian_Khatru

Guest
#13
#13
I appreciate the constructive comments. The focus of my thrust was "am I reinforcing his debauchery". Never did I contemplate whether to cover him or not for my own benefit (extra hours).

When I have a chance, I'll casually bring up to him my stance on covering him for non-emergencies - in love, as See_KING_Truth put it - so that in his times of wanting to flake off, he won't default to passing his hours to me. Consequently, I hope he takes it for what it is - in good stride - and doesn't, instead, choose to deny covering me when I truly need to find a way out. But, as I said, he is a nice kid. Hopefully he'll understand.

Thanks again! :)
 
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