Is my attitude wrong?

[Leigh]

I have a baby of two and epecting the next, im also married and stay with my inlaws. my husband on the other hand expects me to serve him the way a maid would serve her boss and iv come to think that its because he works and i dont. i dont evan have controle over my child, shes started swearing nd fighting and when i try to teach her that its wrong she gets taken away and they start up fight. now you may be thinking so y did she go and fall pregnant again, thing is i was not well and had no idea what was wrong with my body i went through pregnancy tests and they were negative and the doctor said that i had a stomach infection, 6 months down the line i decided to go and see another doctor then he told me that i was 4 months pregnantand all that time i was using the contriceptive. and last friday i found a condom in my husbands work bag when i was packing hes lunch. IV BECOME SO HARD AND EDGY, I BEARLY SMILE, AND PEOPLE DONT EVAN DARE TO SPEAK TO ME COZ THEY AFFRAID I MIGHT BE RUDE. i try to be nice but it just takes too much out of me and i want to get my own place so badley but i dont know what my husband does with the money at the end of the month.

[barukhmalachi]

You may in a bad situation and who could blame you for feeling the way you do. You probly feel like everything is falling apart around you and probly even feel like god id drawing away from you and you've lost all joy and peace. Do you feel trampled on and powerless. Be encouraged, god is still right beside you. He is the prince of peace and our deliverer. The cares of this world are over taking you and its over whelming. Its cluttering your mind and your spirit and blocking gods voice. The power of life and death are in the tongue. And yes your attitude may not be where you would like it. You can't control anyone else but you. These emotions could, if not already give way to depression. Start speaking good and positive things over yourself outloud. Even if you don't see it or believe it yet. Keep confessing good and sowing good seed and you will see a harvest. God knows what your going through and wants to help but you have to preparr your field to sow good seed. Take some time for yourself and praise god and thank him for things you want to come to pass even when you dobt see it. This is sacrificial praise. Praise him when you don't feel like it. Write positive scriptures on a mirror or car window or whatever you see a lot and say it outloud every time you see it. You will see a change in yourself and others will notice. Remember a soft answer turns away wrath. Let god guide you back to his peace and true joy only he can bring. Fill the atmosphere with gods presence by playing christian music constantly while awake and even while you sleep. Your spirit will absorb it. I know this is vague advise and easier said than done. I think joyce meyer teachings could really help you. You are worth the investment of some spiritual tools. God don't promise easy but he will never leave us or forsake us. When the world pulls us from him we have to pull harder towards him. No advise here can fix your situation or emotions and broken heart, but I hope you will be encouraged and may god bring you peace and joy through this storm. This to shall pass.

[Bobbyking]

Originally Posted by Leigh

I have a baby of two and epecting the next, im also married and stay with my inlaws. my husband on the other hand expects me to serve him the way a maid would serve her boss and iv come to think that its because he works and i dont. i dont evan have controle over my child, shes started swearing nd fighting and when i try to teach her that its wrong she gets taken away and they start up fight. now you may be thinking so y did she go and fall pregnant again, thing is i was not well and had no idea what was wrong with my body i went through pregnancy tests and they were negative and the doctor said that i had a stomach infection, 6 months down the line i decided to go and see another doctor then he told me that i was 4 months pregnantand all that time i was using the contriceptive. and last friday i found a condom in my husbands work bag when i was packing hes lunch. IV BECOME SO HARD AND EDGY, I BEARLY SMILE, AND PEOPLE DONT EVAN DARE TO SPEAK TO ME COZ THEY AFFRAID I MIGHT BE RUDE. i try to be nice but it just takes too much out of me and i want to get my own place so badley but i dont know what my husband does with the money at the end of the month.

Dear Leigh

Thanks for taking the time to share about your challenging situation.

Sorry, but you did not mention whether you are a believer but I am going to assume you are. Establishing yourself in God is the MOST IMPORTANT KEY right now in your life. If you want to overcome your problems and if you want God to help you, then combining both, you NEED TO BE STRONG IN CHRIST.

Commit yourself to read God's Word everyday. Get wisdom and knowledge - Read Book of Proverbs, Psalms and the gospels to know what God can do through your life. Allow God to mature you.

And while you are at home, start reading broadly. Do not limit yourself. Be responsible for your own growth & development. Demonstrate self-confident & self-respect.

My point is before you approach your issues, equip yourself first - both spiritually & mentally.

And if you choose to walk in the counsel of God, He will back you up at all times.

[Leigh]

thanx baruk nd bobby for your advice and i wiil try real hard to follow it

[Jenna]

Hi Leigh, just wanted to say, it shows good character that you even ask this question!~ To add a bit: try thanking the Lord for things, all the things we all take for granted. Thank Him for your eyes, ears, legs, arms, hands, feet, water, food, clothing, you get the idea? I find that helps. Things could always be worse...I often think of those people who are poor and sick and suffering, and it makes my problems seem smaller...I don't know, one size does not fit all, but a thankful heart is pleasing to the Lord.

[Brandon777]

Jesus served his diciples even though they didn't deserve it, just out of the love of his heart. And he taught that we should to the same for each other. Would it be so bad to serve your husband? Even though it might not be two-sided, at least you would make him happy. Your husband and God I mean. Plus, I'm sure your husband might begin to respect and love you more over time that way. I'm sure it would be easier if he loved and respected you the way you would expect a husband would. It's true that he does work. And it might be best to share the load of the relationship by serving him.

For your children do you talk or yell at them when they misbehave or do you get a wooden spoon and slap them on their behind? And do your words match up with what you threaten and what you actually carry out? I havn't a clue if you do these things already, but I have seen how phyical punishment and consistancy work.
Being nice can definately be hard to do. Great job trying! cudos to you! The best thing I can say I think is when you bring up subjects that might make him defensive, be gentle, truthful to your feelings, and concise. It might take some considerable thought to know best how to broach a sensitive subject.. like what he's doing with his money.

Remember, don't jump up and go out of control if he lashes back at you. If you're the bigger person, then you win in the end anyway, because God hears every word. He may be trying to cover something up, but the best way is always to stay gentle, truthful to your feelings, and concise while doing your best to avoid insults or things that might make his pride go off. If that doesn't work. Then you need to protect your heart from his hurtful words and go alone to talk it out with God. Then talk to someone you trust or us again. =)

[Leigh]

Originally Posted by Jenna

Hi Leigh, just wanted to say, it shows good character that you even ask this question!~ To add a bit: try thanking the Lord for things, all the things we all take for granted. Thank Him for your eyes, ears, legs, arms, hands, feet, water, food, clothing, you get the idea? I find that helps. Things could always be worse...I often think of those people who are poor and sick and suffering, and it makes my problems seem smaller...I don't know, one size does not fit all, but a thankful heart is pleasing to the Lord.

i just want to have an attitude that is pleasing to god and thanx