Marriage or Singleness --- Is this a calling or a choice?

[dreda]

Since I became a christian the thought of marriage becomes more of a calling than a choice for me...I knew it is a calling to love, care, nurture and commit to someone because nowadays it's easy to just say well I love him or her but is it the one God really wants for you...But as what paul is saying about singleness and marriage in the bible verses below It looks like marriage for him is more of a choice...But if the choice is only to resolve lust as what paul said what will happen if it fades out...There are many divorce nowadays because of this lust resolving idea and it becomes an issue instead in marriage so I still believe that marriage is a clear calling from God the same with singleness...Let me know about your thoughts here...


1 Corinthians 7:8-9 & 1-2

New International Version (NIV)

[SUP]8 [/SUP]Now to the unmarried[SUP][a][/SUP] and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. [SUP]9 [/SUP]But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

7 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” [SUP]2 [/SUP]But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.

 

[Jeshuvan]

Hi there,God Bless You.I would as it states in Matt 6:33 Seek Gods Kingdom and righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you, Amen.Just continue 2 thank god,love him,praise him,worship him,stay busy 4 him in his kingdom sharing the Gospel leading people 2 Jesus,in due time he will reward u.I was doing mission work in India,God brought me more than a wife,he blessed me with a treasure.John.Just be willing,god is more than able.

 

[BarlyGurl]

I think that is pretty accurate to say marriage is a CALLING for Christians and the current "marriage" climate is a pretty good picture of CHrist and the Church. It is kinda catch 22... to be a woman with a desire to be married... since we aren't in a position to just go out and DO IT... Ya know? But I would recommend you remain "willing" just the same.

 

[SHINY707]

Hi Dreda!

I too believe marriage is a calling and so is singleness.

I believe God calls himself as a witness between a man and his wife

Malachi 2:14
[TABLE="width: 95%"]
[TR]
[TD]

2:14​

[/TD]
[TD]

Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant.

​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]

​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
And so if God is himself a witness between a couple how can marriage be someway to resolve lust , Marriage is honorable in my knowledge and I respect it.

 

[Ugly]

Paul certainly didn't believe marriage was a calling. He said marriage got in the way of doing your work for the Lord and should only be entered into if you can't control your sexual urges. Granted these were his opinions. But he is one of the most respectable and wise people in the bible (look at how much of the NT he wrote). So i'll keep his opinions in high regard. I see nothing in the bible referring to marriage as a calling.

 

[BarlyGurl]

Paul certainly didn't believe marriage was a calling. FALSE He said marriage got in the way of doing your work for the Lord and should only be entered into if you can't control your sexual urges.FALSE Granted these were his opinions. But he is one of the most respectable and wise people in the bible (look at how much of the NT he wrote). So i'll keep his opinions in high regard. I see nothing in the bible referring to marriage as a calling. Um... have you read the bible or just the cliff notes???? .. have you ever heard of Ephesians... Chapter 5???

 

[Ugly]

Using sarcasm and insults to correct me with the bible. Is that really supposed to cause me to respect what you have to say? If you think it does, you are dead wrong. If anything it causes me to consider blocking you if you can't find a more respectable way to talk to another about the bible. It borders on hypocrisy to insult someone while trying to use the bible to correct them.

 

[BarlyGurl]

Using sarcasm and insults to correct me with the bible. Is that really supposed to cause me to respect what you have to say? If you think it does, you are dead wrong. If anything it causes me to consider blocking you if you can't find a more respectable way to talk to another about the bible. It borders on hypocrisy to insult someone while trying to use the bible to correct them.[/QUOTE}

Alrighty then... getting you to respect me wasn't on my agenda... getting you to revisit the bible was. You use sarcasm ALL THE TIME... so I am unimpressed with your tactic ^above^..... YOU do sometimes give good biblical advice... but then say stuff like..."I see nothing in the bible referring to marriage as a calling"... and I can't help but wonder HOW you could so entirely miss the mark????

 

[SHINY707]

[TABLE="width: 95%"]
[TR]
[TD]

1Corinthians1:10​

[/TD]
[TD]

Now I beseech you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that ye all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you; but that ye be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]

1:11​

[/TD]
[TD]

For it hath been declared unto me of you, my brethren, by them which are of the house of Chloe, that there are contentions among you.​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]

1:12​

[/TD]
[TD]

Now this I say, that every one of you saith, I am of Paul; and I of Apollos; and I of Cephas; and I of Christ.​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]

1:13​

[/TD]
[TD]

Is Christ divided? was Paul crucified for you? or were ye baptized in the name of Paul?


I am not interested to prove that marriage is a calling , I believe marriage is a calling because I have reasons to believe it , nor am I interested to change anybody's opinions about marriage.
But marriage is a sort of election and God Himself places people in our lives , particularly for those who pray and believe in Him to grant a life partner just for example the story of how God brought Rebekah in the life of Isaac.

Genesis 24:1-28
[TABLE="width: 95%"]
[TR]
[TD]24:1[/TD]
[TD]And Abraham was old, and well stricken in age: and the LORD had blessed Abraham in all things.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:2[/TD]
[TD]And Abraham said unto his eldest servant of his house, that ruled over all that he had, Put, I pray thee, thy hand under my thigh:[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:3[/TD]
[TD]And I will make thee swear by the LORD, the God of heaven, and the God of the earth, that thou shalt not take a wife unto my son of the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell:[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:4[/TD]
[TD]But thou shalt go unto my country, and to my kindred, and take a wife unto my son Isaac.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:5[/TD]
[TD]And the servant said unto him, Peradventure the woman will not be willing to follow me unto this land: must I needs bring thy son again unto the land from whence thou camest?[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:6[/TD]
[TD]And Abraham said unto him, Beware thou that thou bring not my son thither again.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:7[/TD]
[TD]The LORD God of heaven, which took me from my father's house, and from the land of my kindred, and which spake unto me, and that sware unto me, saying, Unto thy seed will I give this land; he shall send his angel before thee, and thou shalt take a wife unto my son from thence.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:8[/TD]
[TD]And if the woman will not be willing to follow thee, then thou shalt be clear from this my oath: only bring not my son thither again.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:9[/TD]
[TD]And the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master, and sware to him concerning that matter.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:10[/TD]
[TD]And the servant took ten camels of the camels of his master, and departed; for all the goods of his master were in his hand: and he arose, and went to Mesopotamia, unto the city of Nahor.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:11[/TD]
[TD]And he made his camels to kneel down without the city by a well of water at the time of the evening, even the time that women go out to draw water.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:12[/TD]
[TD]And he said, O LORD God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day, and show kindness unto my master Abraham.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:13[/TD]
[TD]Behold, I stand here by the well of water; and the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water:[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:14[/TD]
[TD]And let it come to pass, that the damsel to whom I shall say, Let down thy pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink; and she shall say, Drink, and I will give thy camels drink also: let the same be she that thou hast appointed for thy servant Isaac; and thereby shall I know that thou hast showed kindness unto my master.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:15[/TD]
[TD]And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that, behold, Rebekah came out, who was born to Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, with her pitcher upon her shoulder.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:16[/TD]
[TD]And the damsel was very fair to look upon, a virgin, neither had any man known her: and she went down to the well, and filled her pitcher, and came up.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:17[/TD]
[TD]And the servant ran to meet her, and said, Let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:18[/TD]
[TD]And she said, Drink, my lord: and she hasted, and let down her pitcher upon her hand, and gave him drink.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:19[/TD]
[TD]And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also, until they have done drinking.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:20[/TD]
[TD]And she hasted, and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:21[/TD]
[TD]And the man wondering at her held his peace, to wit whether the LORD had made his journey prosperous or not.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:22[/TD]
[TD]And it came to pass, as the camels had done drinking, that the man took a golden earring of half a shekel weight, and two bracelets for her hands of ten shekels weight of gold;[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:23[/TD]
[TD]And said, Whose daughter art thou? tell me, I pray thee: is there room in thy father's house for us to lodge in?[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:24[/TD]
[TD]And she said unto him, I am the daughter of Bethuel the son of Milcah, which she bare unto Nahor.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:25[/TD]
[TD]She said moreover unto him, We have both straw and provender enough, and room to lodge in.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:26[/TD]
[TD]And the man bowed down his head, and worshipped the LORD.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:27[/TD]
[TD]And he said, Blessed be the LORD God of my master Abraham, who hath not left destitute my master of his mercy and his truth: I being in the way, the LORD led me to the house of my master's brethren.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]24:28[/TD]
[TD]And the damsel ran, and told them of her mother's house these things.[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD][/TD]
[TD]
[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]
​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[TR]
[TD]

​

[/TD]
[/TR]
[/TABLE]

 

[my_adonai_]

Since I became a christian the thought of marriage becomes more of a calling than a choice for me...I knew it is a calling to love, care, nurture and commit to someone because nowadays it's easy to just say well I love him or her but is it the one God really wants for you...But as what paul is saying about singleness and marriage in the bible verses below It looks like marriage for him is more of a choice...But if the choice is only to resolve lust as what paul said what will happen if it fades out...There are many divorce nowadays because of this lust resolving idea and it becomes an issue instead in marriage so I still believe that marriage is a clear calling from God the same with singleness...Let me know about your thoughts here...


1 Corinthians 7:8-9 & 1-2

New International Version (NIV)

[SUP]8 [/SUP]Now to the unmarried[SUP][a][/SUP] and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. [SUP]9 [/SUP]But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

7 Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.”[SUP]2 [/SUP]But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband.

I love you sister and I LOVE THIS....

 

[my_adonai_]

GOD gives Graces to every choice He wants us to make and even after making it. So its nothing to worry about really, we just have to walk with HIM everyday, and every step. He sees if we need a spouse or not. And to every choice He wants us to make HE promises to be with us. So just do what GOD wants you to do now, and let those things come at their time.

God bless you sister.

 

[dreda]

Jeshuvan your message was God's message too for me this morning about this post that I made hehe .. He knew the reason why I posted this on the first place...I thank everyone for sharing their ideas ..But I really don't want to cause disputes or heated arguments here, I hope we'll just respect each other's opinion and stay safe with how we address our words since this is a christian forum i guess being sensitive is the same as being respectful too...So I'm rly sorry if the topic got on your nerves however I appreciate all the sharing you made...I actually posted this to my other site's forum before posting here in CC and til now the choice and calling thing for marriage specifically still did not end. I guess I should have change the title to only marriage hehe..I'm pretty getting a lot of useful resource from the bible like what SHINY707 said...
I can almost conclude now that marriage and singleness is both a choice and a calling...
Well this is an important decision to lift up to God even if we can say it's a choice or a calling but God will make it clear individually to us if we will truly seek Him...Because we have our own choice God will understand that but there is also God's choice which is the best, agree?

Also I brought this topic to help ladies and gents align this kind of decision in an important perspective most importantly before marrying...I ask you so -- "How will it affects us if marriage is based on our choice or based on God's calling for a person to us"???? is it like the song when God made you He must have been thinkin about me

​