I was challenged about my ex-homosexuality today

nzlotrfan · Dec 2, 2013

Up until the beginning of this year (I'm now 20), I identified as a [closet] homosexual. But earlier this year, I met this wonderful girl with whom I am now in a Christian relationship with. I became a Christian one month into in our dating stage, and consider myself an ex-homosexual. As Jesus has changed my perceptions and values and sexual desires.

Anyway, today I was with a friend who I hadn't seen for a few months, and she knew of my prior homosexuality. We haven't had the best friendship lately due to various reasons and different beliefs. She told me that she was concerned for me as she believes homosexuality is completely ok, and that I'm just hiding and lying about my true sexuality. - She is a half-hearted Christian, I should add, but she has done some research about the bible and it's stance on homosexuality to debate with me. She told me that God loves everyone, as long as they love and good people etc, and other various things.

I told her honestly, that I haven't really done much research myself, because I've only just begun reading the bible. So I told her I can only say that for me personally my values have changed, and now I don't believe homosexuality is right. She said a lot of convincing points, which did make me think about myself, but I am sure I'm different now. She kept saying that what I believe about myself being an ex-homosexual is wrong, and that that just isn't right me believing that. As we are born a particular way.

Anyway, after we departed, I did some thinking myself. This is what I was thinking...
***If homosexuality is just normal attraction that God has given those persons, and that the Bible's references to homosexuality are outdated/taken out of context, and it's just that now society and other Christians are coming to realize that homosexuality is actually ok... It's just a movement like the Black Civil Rights movement... Then my question is: couldn't the same be argued for pedofiles? That pedofiles are just normal people, but God has made their attraction specifically towards children? They didn't choose their sexuality, that's just the way we are. Yet we generally as people non-christian and Christian peoples regard pedofilia as wrong.

^ Is this a good way at looking at homosexuality? Am I right in my comparison?

I need some answers for my self, as my friend sort of left me thinking/doubting myself today.

T_Laurich · Dec 2, 2013

I think you need to ground yourself in the study of sin...

Not homosexuality but "sin"... And ask the question why should I not sin if Jesus covers everything... The apple you are biting is bigger than just homosexuality but touches every sin... The best book for you to read is Romans... It touches a lot and frequently on this point...

When you read the bible it does not abolish slavery... In fact parts of the new testament talk to slaves directly and tell them that they should obey their master... But it does say all men are equal... All men are equally lost in sin, and all men are equally found in Christ... The man that humbles himself will be exalted and the one who exalts himself will be humbled...

You friends comparison between homosexuality and slavery is not biblical but the modernistic view on slavery... They see former Christians such as early Americans owning slaves and automatically think that the bible puts one race under another... When the bible teaches we are all children of God...

I am sketched to answer your comparison bluntly because I can not tell the tone you asked it in...

When you say "

"

I think you are taking a very modernistic view on this... I suggest you read scriptures like Jude 1:7... Leviticus 18:22... 1 Kings 14:24... Romans 1:18-32... 1 Corinthians 6:9-11... 1 Timothy 1:8-10

People who start to realize it is okay, are taking bits and pieces out of the bible to appease the modern culture...

Your connection between pedophiles and homosexuals is spot on... In fact pedophiles are starting to lobby and demand rights... Funny how psychology has proved that homosexuality is a disorder or mental disease but only after the homosexual rights movement started gaining weight have people negated this fact...

(Don't worry I am not one of those Christians that think they are 100% sinless, I too struggle with homosexuality... Not as much as you, but I do struggle...

didymos · Dec 2, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

You claim to be a christian, yet you fail to take God's Word in its entirety seriously. If scripture concerning homosexual acts is 'outdated,' why not state the same about other scripture, or about the whole Bible for that matter. It doesn't work that way, you don't get to pick and choose, you can't just leave out the bits that don't suit you, claiming they're 'outdated,' or 'taking out of context.' This discussion would be much more interesting if you presented some evidence and/or scripture to support your claims and not just accept what society 'says.' Remember we're in this world, but not of it. If you are a christian with a homosexual inclination, that's between you and God.
And if you claim that God made homosexuals the way they are, please present scripture to support that claim too, before you even think of making similar claims about pedophiles. The comparison you make is offensive to gay people, especially those who struggle with their inclination. You can say what you want about gays, but at least homosexual intercourse is with mutual consent, two adults are involved who themselves are accountable for their actions. A pedophile just sees a child as an object. It's bizarre to see how pedophiles demand equal rights, while they themselves don't care about children's rights at all. Just because the pedos lobby and demand rights doesn't make their case similar to that of the homosexuals, and certainly not to that of the black civil rights movement. Just hinting to similarities here is offensive.

Isdaniel · Dec 2, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

Isaiah 1

9 Except the Lord of hosts had left unto us a very small remnant, we should have been as Sodom, and we should have been like unto Gomorrah.
10 Hear the word of the Lord, ye rulers of Sodom; give ear unto the law of our God, ye people of Gomorrah.
11 To what purpose is the multitude of your sacrifices unto me? saith the Lord: I am full of the burnt offerings of rams, and the fat of fed beasts; and I delight not in the blood of bullocks, or of lambs, or of he goats.
12 When ye come to appear before me, who hath required this at your hand, to tread my courts?
13 Bring no more vain oblations; incense is an abomination unto me; the new moons and sabbaths, the calling of assemblies, I cannot away with; it is iniquity, even the solemn meeting.
14 Your new moons and your appointed feasts my soul hateth: they are a trouble unto me; I am weary to bear them.
15 And when ye spread forth your hands, I will hide mine eyes from you: yea, when ye make many prayers, I will not hear: your hands are full of blood.
16 Wash you, make you clean; put away the evil of your doings from before mine eyes; cease to do evil;
17 Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.
18Come now, and let us reason together, saith the Lord: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
19 If ye be willing and obedient, ye shall eat the good of the land:
20 But if ye refuse and rebel, ye shall be devoured with the sword: for the mouth of the Lord hath spoken it.

Repent Repent

nzlotrfan · Dec 2, 2013

Hi,

Firstly, no offence intended - apologies for that. You have misunderstood my points though (Sorry, my post wasn't very clear).

Re what you said about not taking God's word in its entirety seriously... That is not my view. I was reiterating what my friend was telling me. She was telling me that the references to homosexuality in the Old Testament shouldn't be taken seriously now like how it the bible talked about not eating pork etc. SHE also told me about the notion that God made homosexuals the way they are. << Again, not my thoughts, this is what she was telling me.

Re my comment on the black civil rights movement, this is what my friend was saying: This is like the black civil rights movement of our time, homosexuals now are fighting for equality, so that they can love one another, and in time people will look back at the prejudice people like me had towards homosexuality.

In terms of your comment about those people who struggle with their inclination. - Trust me, it wasn't like I became a Christian and my past desires stopped altogether.. But it is a process as I learn and grow more in my faith.

Just to reiterate everyone, the *** in my original message are the points my friend was giving me. Imagine I am saying "If the points you've shared with me are true, then couldn't the same be argued for pedofiles?" - hopefully that clears up what I'm saying T_Laurich and didymos.

Thanks

ThomistColin · Dec 2, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

Your friend means well, even though her interpretation of Scripture is not supported by most Christians. As for homosexuality vs. pedophilia: I think there is an intrinsic difference between being attracted to the same sex and being attracted to children. Both are sin, and both are held by God as equally sinful, but we must remember that we cannot compare our sins, only acknowledge them before the Lord.

nzlotrfan · Dec 2, 2013

ThomistColin said:

Ok.. But who is right? My friend or "most Christians"?

A more general question now; we all sin, so should people accept their homosexuality and embrace it because we are sinful beings anyway?

If we all sin, aren't we forgin whatever our sins are? So come judgement day, as long as we love the Lord, and ask for forgiveness.... We can do whatever we want because that's how we are... Seeing as all sin is equal in the eyes of God.

tripsin · Dec 2, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

The late actor Anthony (Tony) Perkins was interviewed and said that he once thought he was homosexual and had many homosexual encounters, until he met and had an affair with Victoria Principal. He later married and had two children.

Your friend is going to try to convince you that you are wrong because it threatens her own belief system and/or lifestyle. It doesn't compute with what she has been indoctrinated with and allowed herself to believe.

Stay fast in the Christian teachings on this subject, and may the Lord keep you strong.

GISMYS · Dec 2, 2013

A "REAL" BELIEVER WILL NOT WANT TO LIVE THEIR LIFE IN THE SICK ABIOMINATION OF SEXUAL PERVERSION,REAL BELIEVERS STILL SIN BUT THEY HATE SIN AND TRY TO LIVE BETTER TODAY THAN YESTERDAY!

nzlotrfan · Dec 3, 2013

That's an interesting and helpful post, thank-you

.

Does anyone else have any thoughts to share?

shrimp · Dec 3, 2013

yes, read the new and old testament and let God ground you, not other people. God doesn't want reeds blowing in the wind, easily swayed by evil. He wants us to be firm in our faith. Study and show yourself approved. Not many want to agree with God, that is their decision. Your's is sitting there too. Follow Godly wisdom or follow man's wisdom.
Never and I mean NEVER take anything anybody says about God at face value. If it doesn't align with God's Word, chuck it out of your head, heart, and life.

As for me, not that anyone would or has asked it's just a courtesy note, I do not believe a word of what your friend has said. I don't believe it because I have grounded myself in God's word.

Stand Fast, Hold to the Faith.

T_Laurich · Dec 4, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

Notice how at least half of the verses I provided are from the New testament... Homosexuality being a abomination is not old hat...

Also if you hold the idea that you can do whatever you want and Jesus will take care of it... What you are saying is that your personal convictions are more important then trying to show your love for God...

I seriously think you need to ground yourself in Romans... If you read Romans I am willing to bet that in 5 days, you will no longer have the same view points...

didymos · Dec 4, 2013

nzlotrfan said:

Alright. Well, at least now you know what to tell your 'friend.'

nzlotrfan · Dec 5, 2013

Any other thoughts out there?

alexis · Dec 5, 2013

This is my opinion only. Some of it based on information I learned doing a school project but nonetheless my opinion.

But I do not think it is possible to be born a homosexual.

In child developement a small child has no sexual identity. They are neither hedrosexual nor homosexual. Sexuality is developed between the ages of 5 and 9... That's early sexuality development mean identifying gender and gender roles. Now by what psychologists deem to be normal during this stage in a perfect healthy environment a child begins do develope a sexual identity, we don't all do this at the same rate. Then we begin in early puberty to develope sexual preferences. This is all explained very well in a book called Gender Matters. So that said pedophilia is considered a disease but only because society deems it horrific. Which it is... But my point is homosexuality is an unhealthy sexual developement just parts of mainstream society accept it. That said it in fact psychology wise is not much different. However, it's affect on society and the children whom are hurt is much worse than anything else.

Now all that said it is clear that homosexuality is a sin. It is also clear that divorce besides if your spouse cheats is a sin. It is also clear that if you look upon another with desire it is sin, unless you are married to them.

As to why it changed, well it could be you simply wanted love.

I personally would say it is you opening your heart to God. His love allows you the happiness of your girlfriend and the blessings of freedom from that sin.

I will probably get slammed and misunderstood for this but it's how I see it.

I know for sure Jesus loves you and He loves me... Pray and he will heal all and give you what you ask for, whether it be even just an answer to this question.

Love you
lexi

Lucetta · Dec 6, 2013

"Same-sex attraction itself is not a sin, but yielding to it is. However, through repentance Jesus Christ will offer forgiveness."

"God has given us commandments that support family and individual happiness. One of these is the Law of Chastity — individuals should have no sexual relations except in marriage, which Latter-day Saints define as between a man and a woman. Sexual intimacy is a powerful and beautiful thing. For this very reason it should be treated with care, within the boundaries of commitment and responsibility."

I believe that you should love people no matter what, but hate the sin. No one is any less than another due to sins/problems/trials etc. but homosexuality is a sin. Does that mean we're mean to people that are gay or something? NO. They are children of God, but does that mean we have to accept the sin as well? No.

""We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties. But we cannot stand idle if they indulge in immoral activity, if they try to uphold and defend and live in a so-called same-sex marriage situation. To permit such would be to make light of the very serious and sacred foundation of God-sanctioned marriage and its very purpose, the rearing of families"

**LDS links removed

I think these websites will help give you more ideas on how to answer some of your friends questions.

AlwaysBlessed · Dec 6, 2013

Blessings
Hello Brother in Christ! First of,
Welcome to the Family!

I hope this reply presents to you some of the answer you are looking for, and might show to your friend.
These are the answer God's put in my heart.

Shall we continue sinning, because God forgives us anyway? Simply No.
Romans 5
[SUP]18 [/SUP]Therefore, as through one man’s offense judgment came to all men, resulting in condemnation, even so through one Man’s righteous act the free gift came to all men, resulting in justification of life. [SUP]19 [/SUP]For as by one man’s disobedience many were made sinners, so also by one Man’s obedience many will be made righteous.
[SUP]20 [/SUP]Moreover the law entered that the offense might abound. But where sin abounded, grace abounded much more, [SUP]21 [/SUP]so that as sin reigned in death, even so grace might reign through righteousness to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Romans 6
What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? [SUP]2 [/SUP]Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it? [SUP]3 [/SUP]Or do you not know that as many of us as were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into His death? [SUP]4 [/SUP]Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

[SUP]5 [/SUP]For if we have been united together in the likeness of His death, certainly we also shall be in the likeness of His resurrection, [SUP]6 [/SUP]knowing this, that our old man was crucified with Him, that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves of sin. [SUP]7 [/SUP]For he who has died has been freed from sin. [SUP]8 [/SUP]Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him, [SUP]9 [/SUP]knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, dies no more. Death no longer has dominion over Him. [SUP]10 [/SUP]For the death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He lives to God. [SUP]11 [/SUP]Likewise you also, reckon yourselves to be dead indeed to sin, but alive to God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

[SUP]12 [/SUP]Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body, that you should obey it in its lusts. [SUP]13 [/SUP]And do not present your members as instruments of unrighteousness to sin, but present yourselves to God as being alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. [SUP]14 [/SUP]For sin shall not have dominion over you, for you are not under law but under grace.

In regards to whether homosexuality was an outdated concept, let's look at:
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
(Hebrews 13:8)
God doesn't change, never.
The God in the Old Testament, is the God in the New Testament. He is not limited by a Book or time. He is The Word itself, the Alpha and Omega
Revelations 22:13
I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end, the first and the last.

God's Design:
He created them male and female and blessed them. And he named them "Mankind" when they were created.

Noticed how a male and a female, Blessed by God were Mankind. Not one without the other.

nzlotrfan said:

Absolutely correct.

And again,
you are a new Creation Brother!
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:17)

Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. (Colossians 3:9-10)

Brother, you are with family here, any other questions, don't even hesitate to post.
God made you with a purpose, no one, no mountain high, no valley low, can separate you from His hand.
God is by your side.

Romans 9:28-31
"And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He alos justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified. What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?" Romans 8:28-31

I second what others wrote, read Romans. And John 3:30.

kenthomas27 · Dec 7, 2013

Lucetta said:

Very well said Lucetta! I'm afraid that I struggle with the "acceptance" of the gay life style. I've grown up in an atmosphere where homosexuals are ridiculed and treated hatefully - and I'm guilty of this too. I still have issues and I don't believe I'll ever be able to "accept" a gay lifestyle as a normal alternate sexuality. However, because of people like you who have treated these people with love and concern but make it clear that their lifestyle is sinful and abhorrent to God, I am learning to accept them as brothers and sister in Christ or as souls lost that have a chance of being found. So - God bless you for saying this so well.

seeking_enlightenment · Nov 26, 2014

I also had a similar experience as you, but ultimately found that trying to "force" something I am not was not healthy, both physically and spiritually. I also began to realize this when I was in Brazil and saw an incredible image on a church door. It's posted in the new members section. http://christianchat.com/new-christ...rselves/103292-my-faith-being-challenged.html hope that helps a bit.

UniKitty · Nov 28, 2014

Hey Nzlotrfan,

First I just want to praise God with you brother that He rescued you!! <3<3 I want to say right now, I sincerely believe your ''friend,'' the girl who suggests the Bible does not speak on the topic of homosexuality or that if it does it is outdated, could and is very likely a messenger of light sent by the devil to serve as a distraction for you or to cause you to doubt what you know to be true. Be on your guard and put on the whole armor of God! (Ephesians 6) The Lord Jesus Christ is changing your heart--you stick Him and keep a close prayer/devotional life, and He won't lead you astray, regardless of what outside individuals say.

You have been delivered from this affliction, but here is a website that may serve as an encouragement to others who are struggling with homosexuality. www.voices-of-change.org - Home (Voices of Change) This includes testimonies of many former homosexuals sharing their former struggles, how they were unhappy with that lifestyle, and how they were not born with it, but yet that it was not something easy to just throw off. They needed healing, *self-awareness/greater understanding of themselves and their problem, and the *power of God, most of all! I cannot identify with this lifestyle as I've never experienced it, but it is still something near/dear to my heart as a Christian because of all the lies that are being spread about it daily--that it is natural, desirable, and innocent (without posing any threat). All the people on these testimonial videos would tell the world quite otherwise!! The initial, introductory video is very eye-opening/informative as well. With Love to You~~ God be with you and may He keep liars and hypocrites who profess to know the Bible far from you. Keep reading and God will teach you all you need to know <3

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