Marriage on the rocks details inside

[Vwgreasemonky]

I am 22 married to a 18 year old in the navy. We are struggling with the accusation of infidelity in the marriage . I have heard many rumors about what happens in the barracks . So me being concerned with our lack of communication and the distance I was away from my wife . I picked up sold my dream truck my tools and quit my job as a apprentice machinist to be near her . I came her with the ideal i needed to fix our marriage . And 3600 miles away wasn't the place to do it . After trying for about 1 month now I have only confirmed my fears of what goes on in the mixed gender barracks and have heard rumors of my wife's involvement . I brought it up to her only for her to deny it than shut down . She has lived a hard life abused by her father and grandfather and in and out of foster homes . I fear that she has cheated on me . Any insight how do I go about this ? What should be my next steps . I feel the window to fix this is closing fast. Just my two cents I would like her to be back in California with me and going to school out of the navy . Which is just one sees pool of sexual indulgence .

 

[blue_ladybug]

I am 22 married to a 18 year old in the navy. We are struggling with the accusation of infidelity in the marriage . I have heard many rumors about what happens in the barracks . So me being concerned with our lack of communication and the distance I was away from my wife . I picked up sold my dream truck my tools and quit my job as a apprentice machinist to be near her . I came her with the ideal i needed to fix our marriage . And 3600 miles away wasn't the place to do it . After trying for about 1 month now I have only confirmed my fears of what goes on in the mixed gender barracks and have heard rumors of my wife's involvement . I brought it up to her only for her to deny it than shut down . She has lived a hard life abused by her father and grandfather and in and out of foster homes . I fear that she has cheated on me . Any insight how do I go about this ? What should be my next steps . I feel the window to fix this is closing fast. Just my two cents I would like her to be back in California with me and going to school out of the navy . Which is just one sees pool of sexual indulgence .

Vwgreasemonkey, first of all, 18 is way too young an age for anyone to get married at!! I have no idea what happens in the Navy but if men and women are together in mixed barracks, (which should be illegal) then stuff is bound to happen between them. If your wife is cheating on you, and obviously she is or you would'nt be hearing rumors about it, then that is the only allowance God makes for divorce. Being so young, she seems incredibly immature and is "sowing her wild oats." Please dont let her drag you down with her. I would tell her that you are filing for divorce for irreconcilable differences. When two people are so far away, and one is cheating, there can be nothing for heartbreak for both of you if you stay in this marriage with her. Set her free to do her duty as a Navy officer. Try to remain friends with her if at all possible. Let her finish growing up and become a responsible, mature adult. I'm sure you love her and dont like the thought of divorce, but God will stand by through this time. Put your trust in him, since your wife has destroyed your trust in her.

 

[J-Kay-2]

I am 22 married to a 18 year old in the navy. We are struggling with the accusation of infidelity in the marriage . I have heard many rumors about what happens in the barracks . So me being concerned with our lack of communication and the distance I was away from my wife . I picked up sold my dream truck my tools and quit my job as a apprentice machinist to be near her . I came her with the ideal i needed to fix our marriage . And 3600 miles away wasn't the place to do it . After trying for about 1 month now I have only confirmed my fears of what goes on in the mixed gender barracks and have heard rumors of my wife's involvement . I brought it up to her only for her to deny it than shut down . She has lived a hard life abused by her father and grandfather and in and out of foster homes . I fear that she has cheated on me . Any insight how do I go about this ? What should be my next steps . I feel the window to fix this is closing fast. Just my two cents I would like her to be back in California with me and going to school out of the navy . Which is just one sees pool of sexual indulgence .

When the military began to put men and women together it shows
how stupid some leaders are. We all know you can't mix men and
women together and not have fornication. It takes a mighty strong
love and respect for those who love their married mate, to refuse
to participate in adultery.

Age 18 and she just signed up? Does this mean she has 2 to 4 yrs.
to go? Was she in the military when you married her ? Why did she
choose to go there instead of being your wife? I believe you need
proof she is messing around and then as you were told, you have
the option to discuss what steps to take.

This is sad for you. It is hard enough for couples to stay faithful
today without the military doing all they can to weaken our defense.

Prayers that The Lord will show you what is best. May He guide
your steps. Please if you know Jesus as your Savior, go to Him first,
asking for guidance. My heart goes out to you. Should this not work
out, remember there is someone God has for you. But don't rush it,
be careful... and above all...forgive her for what your wife has done.
God bless ~

 

[mamasan]

If all you are going on is rumors, give her the benefit of the doubt. Let her know that you love her and trust her, and want your marriage to work. If she is not being faithful to you, you will find out soon enough. Do not listen to gossip.