Don't you just hate it when Christians say......

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SavedByHim

Guest
#1
#1
Hi,

I was wondering, BEFORE you became a Christian, was there something that REALLY irritated you about their way of conduct or something particular they said when they were trying to minister to you?

For example I used to dislike when they said,
Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged."


Sometimes when I hear that, I feel that it sounded soooo Holier than thou and hypocritical. I would think "Are you not judging me now by saying that?". The reason I post this is so I can learn how to better conduct myself as a Christian

Anyway, I post this because I want to hear
First: What you disliked hearing before you became a Christian that could have deterred you away from the religion
Second: How since becoming a Christian can you not do the same to others in order to minister more effectively

Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.


God Bless
 
J

Jordache

Guest
#2
#2
I really hated and still do when Christians say, "Well lets just pray about that. ". "God's in control." Etc

These things are often true, but you completely shut the person down who's sharing with you and invalidate any concern they have. Life is completely. Yes in one sense the answer is that God is in control, but its a lot more complicated than that for most people most of the time. People need to be heard and validated sometimes before they get to a place where they can believe that God is in control.

i try to be a good listener. I try to relate to what others are saying. Feelings are individual. What may be a blip on the screen to one person can be the end to another persons world. I try to acknowledge the pain, confusion, or turmoil they are in.
 
N

nathan3

Guest
#3
#3
SavedByHim said:
Anyway, I post this because I want to hear
First: What you disliked hearing before you became a Christian that could have deterred you away from the religion
Second: How since becoming a Christian can you not do the same to others in order to minister more effectively

Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.


God Bless
Click to expand...

before I became a Christian I never gave it a thought .I was not around any Christians.

I'm around more Christians now after I became one, and I find some things bother me Now after the fact.

No offence, but when I read or hear some one say to other people, or other Christians even" " are you saved, are you born again ? " .

It's not a productive way to go about getting to know some one , and it is impersonal to other people, in my opinion.


Also, the gossip and rush to look for dirt on eachother, rather then reason things out peaceably from whats written in the Bible.

I understand Christ came to those who are sick, not those who are well, so I'm not judging.. That aside, having the name Christian, we need to get our act together at some point, and put aside childish things.

I'll include myself in there, we all have room to mature.
 
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Kreation

Kreation

Senior Member
#4
Sep 19, 2013
169
4
0
#4
When I was a non christian I found that the references to hell were overbearing and very threatening.

"sinners go to hell"
or "he's coming! Do not let him find you ASLEEP"

By saying that I used to be afraid of Christ ( which is totally the wrong message!). So I used to discredit the whole religion by saying it is false and used evolution as my shield.

For that reason I never mention future judgement in my ministry. Instead I focus on the present and the love for Christ and the gospel.
 
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phil36

phil36

Senior Member
#5
Feb 12, 2009
8,260
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#5
Before I was a Christian.. I thought all Christians were judgemental... who do they think they are..do they think they have a better life than me.. and they were all hypocrites.

What changed my mind... a plain telling of how it is.. the truth .

What do I think now? yep we are still all sinners.. and the plain fact is we do have something better.. don't forget most non Christians will think the gospel is judgemental.
 
thecreationtutor

thecreationtutor

Senior Member
#6
Jun 30, 2011
2,521
35
0
#6
SavedByHim said:
Hi,

I was wondering, BEFORE you became a Christian, was there something that REALLY irritated you about their way of conduct or something particular they said when they were trying to minister to you?

For example I used to dislike when they said,
Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged."


Sometimes when I hear that, I feel that it sounded soooo Holier than thou and hypocritical. I would think "Are you not judging me now by saying that?". The reason I post this is so I can learn how to better conduct myself as a Christian

Anyway, I post this because I want to hear
First: What you disliked hearing before you became a Christian that could have deterred you away from the religion
Second: How since becoming a Christian can you not do the same to others in order to minister more effectively

Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.


God Bless
Click to expand...
Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged." that's funny because this is what people say before their saved, for the most part - that's what I used to say before I was saved
 
just-me

just-me

Banned
#7
Mar 4, 2013
7,761
107
0
#7
thecreationtutor said:
Matthew 7:1 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged." that's funny because this is what people say before their saved, for the most part - that's what I used to say before I was saved
Click to expand...
Good point. There is a similarity between the secular world and the religious world. One thing we all should understand is that the English translation of the Bible uses the word "Judge" for two different things. One means demean the character unjustly, or to condemn, and the other means discern. I'll leave it up to your wisdom, and understanding. Hopefully wisdom will prevail in the Christian world.

John 7:24 (KJV)
[SUP]24 [/SUP]Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.
Matthew 7:1 (KJV)
[SUP]1 [/SUP]Judge not, that ye be not judged.
Luke 6:37 (KJV)
[SUP]37 [/SUP]Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:

Forgiveness is not arbitrary. Repentance is required. God requires it along with confession.
 
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J

JDecree

Guest
#8
#8
It is a bit of a nitpick but it always bothers(ed) me when Christians might be witnessing to someone or whatever and they start the sentence with "Friend,..."

I dont know why but it comes off as disingenuous or something to me. Dunno why. No big deal though lol
 
sandtigeress

sandtigeress

Senior Member
#9
Apr 29, 2013
526
16
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#9
I did not like the unasked for "I pray for you".

To me that implied, they knew better (than me and god) and that god was neccessary to help me, be however they wanted me to be, instead of accepting that people are different.

Took me long, to not only accept, other prying for me, but to ask for it and to see it as a wonderfull thing.
 
p_rehbein

p_rehbein

Senior Member
#10
Sep 4, 2013
30,297
6,590
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#10
QUOTE FROM: SavedbyHim:

Anyway, I post this because I want to hear
First: What you disliked hearing before you became a Christian that could have deterred you away from the religion
Second: How since becoming a Christian can you not do the same to others in order to minister more effectively

Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.

END QUOTE............

"first" It irritated me that people didn't know the difference between Christianity and religion........even before giving my life to Christ, I understood that Christianity was a "faith," and not a religion........

"second" I never refer to Christianity as a "religion," thus trying to avoid confusing anyone seeking answers.........

[I feel I should point out that by asking people to relate here what "bothered" them about Christians before they were saved, IS ASKING them to "judge" is it not? And you state that the "whole point of this thread is to "learn not to judge."

so, if we have learned.............maybe no one should comment here?

:)
 
Kreation

Kreation

Senior Member
#11
Sep 19, 2013
169
4
0
#11
p_rehbein said:
QUOTE FROM: SavedbyHim:

Anyway, I post this because I want to hear
First: What you disliked hearing before you became a Christian that could have deterred you away from the religion
Second: How since becoming a Christian can you not do the same to others in order to minister more effectively

Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.

END QUOTE............

"first" It irritated me that people didn't know the difference between Christianity and religion........even before giving my life to Christ, I understood that Christianity was a "faith," and not a religion........

"second" I never refer to Christianity as a "religion," thus trying to avoid confusing anyone seeking answers.........

[I feel I should point out that by asking people to relate here what "bothered" them about Christians before they were saved, IS ASKING them to "judge" is it not? And you state that the "whole point of this thread is to "learn not to judge."

so, if we have learned.............maybe no one should comment here?

:)
Click to expand...

I feel you are missing the whole point of this thread. SavedByHim started a very interesting conversation asking what repelled us to christianity when we weren't saved. The whole point of this thread is to learn how to minister most effectively as christians, so we can empathise and understand how atheists feel when we say things that we didn't know caused offence. I'm sorry you find this thread offensive but other people are finding it beneficial, so you don't have to participate if you don't want to.
 
p_rehbein

p_rehbein

Senior Member
#12
Sep 4, 2013
30,297
6,590
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#12
Kreation said:
I feel you are missing the whole point of this thread. SavedByHim starting a very interesting conversation asking what repelled us to christianity when we weren't saved. The whole point of this thread is to learn how to minister most effectively as christians, so we can empathise and understand how atheists feel when we say things that we didn't know caused offence. I'm sorry you find this thread offensive but other people are finding it beneficial, so you don't have to participate if you don't want to.
Click to expand...
........misunderstanding?.........

I do not find the thread offensive whatsoever......didya miss the :)?

As well, did you read my comment concerning Christianity NOT being a religion? That was in direct response to the concept of the OP..............Seems to me, if we want to effectively witness to people, we should start by being sure they understand that our "faith" is not an earthly religion......... :)

The secondary comment was tongue in cheek........thus the wee little :) following it........
 
Kreation

Kreation

Senior Member
#13
Sep 19, 2013
169
4
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#13
p_rehbein said:
........misunderstanding?.........

I do not find the thread offensive whatsoever......didya miss the :)?

As well, did you read my comment concerning Christianity NOT being a religion? That was in direct response to the concept of the OP..............Seems to me, if we want to effectively witness to people, we should start by being sure they understand that our "faith" is not an earthly religion......... :)

The secondary comment was tongue in cheek........thus the wee little :) following it........
Click to expand...

Oh i'm sorry!!! please forgive me :eek:

That just made me think, how many times have we been misunderstood having ministered online? It's very difficult to show our true emotions online.

For example, a post could be portrayed as sarcastic when you really didn't mean it that way. I guess face to face is always the best way :)
 
p_rehbein

p_rehbein

Senior Member
#14
Sep 4, 2013
30,297
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#14
Kreation said:
Oh i'm sorry!!! please forgive me :eek:

That just made me think, how many times have we been misunderstood having ministered online? It's very difficult to show our true emotions online.

For example, a post could be portrayed as sarcastic when you really didn't mean it that way. I guess face to face is always the best way :)
Click to expand...
Tell me about it...........I do it all the time.......misunderstand that is. This form of communication may be "revolutionary," but it is certainly "lacking" in many, many ways...........Eye contact, body language, tone of voice, facial expressions and such.....

Where is R2D2 when you need him?
 
Kreation

Kreation

Senior Member
#15
Sep 19, 2013
169
4
0
#15
p_rehbein said:
Tell me about it...........I do it all the time.......misunderstand that is. This form of communication may be "revolutionary," but it is certainly "lacking" in many, many ways...........Eye contact, body language, tone of voice, facial expressions and such.....

Where is R2D2 when you need him?
Click to expand...

It true by my last comment though!!.. how can you know how a person is really speaking from a post? I was actually smiling while I typed it and was trying to be friendly..
But I just looked at my post from your eyes and this is how I saw it.

I'm sorry you find this thread offensive but other people are finding it beneficial, SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO PARTICIPATE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO!

haha..... oh deary me. I need to go and make coffee
 
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B

BradC

Guest
#16
#16
I agree that as believers we say things that are unwise but as we grow up we learn to exercise our tongue more and more in the wisdom of God. I know of a pastor who was very reluctant in receiving a gospel tract before he was saved that contained a message about the fires of hell that man is doomed for without believing in the sacrifice of Christ. He took that tract and went to a private place to read it and got more angry. He testified later how God used that tract to convict him even though he believes and practices telling others about the love of God. You can never know what place the heart is at and what it's going to take to get the attention of that heart. If we react as unbelievers to those things that believers say, count it a blessing from God because it made you uncomfortable and got your attention even though you disliked it and maybe even mocked. Do we really know what spirit we are of when it comes to these things or are we just letting the our flesh keep reacting without any resolve through the death of the cross. It could be the wisdom of God to not judge lest we be judged!
 
p_rehbein

p_rehbein

Senior Member
#17
Sep 4, 2013
30,297
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#17
Kreation said:
It true by my last comment though!!.. how can you know how a person is really speaking from a post? I was actually smiling while I typed it and was trying to be friendly..
But I just looked at my post from your eyes and this is how I saw it.

I'm sorry you find this thread offensive but other people are finding it beneficial, SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO PARTICIPATE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO!

haha..... oh deary me. I need to go and make coffee
Click to expand...
If it helps, I did not take your comment that way........... :) just saying...... :)
 
p_rehbein

p_rehbein

Senior Member
#18
Sep 4, 2013
30,297
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#18
I am wondering here though........if we should expand a bit on the OP?

as stated: Please do not criticize other people's comments on this thread as the whole point of this thread is to learn not judge.

Would it help for us to determine what "judgment" Jesus was speaking of? See, there are many Scriptures that kinda tell us we need to learn to "judge." Thinking of "ye shall know a tree by it's fruits........man by his works." And Paul gives us instructions on choosing deacons and such........and do we not have to "judge" if someone meets those requirement?

To me, Jesus is saying whatever "standard" of judgment we use to judge others by, is the very same standard we will be judged by.........and, let's face it, as humans, we tend to give ourselves some slack for something we might do, and if another does the very same thing, they don't get that slack............

I also have equated this statement by Jesus to "judging" the relationship between a person and God.........their spiritual state, and not earthly actions........Meaning we should never condemn someone to be unsaved because they do not meet our standards of what saved means.........hope that makes sense.......sigh......

Still, we have to try the spirits to know they are of God............and such..........so, it can be confusing when we say, don't judge...........anyway.........just some thoughts.......... :)
 
1

1disciple

Banned
#19
Nov 13, 2012
321
4
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#19
1) We're glad you're here. If you wouldn't mind reaching in the pew in front of you and taking a visitor's card and filing it out so we can minister to your needs.

2) All church anouncements.

3) Children's church in any form.

4) Vainglorious praise teams.

5) Preachers who smile far more than any human should smile at 8:30 on Sunday morning and then ask me if I'm 'excited to be there', whereupon I am expected by rote to shout 'Amen!'.

6) People shaking my hand and giving me that look of 'We're shaking your hand and meeting you because that's part of our program. And we want you to be part of our system. We can clearly see that you're single and that you don't have a beautiful wife, who would be a great asset to our lady's ministry, and since that's the case we'll invite you to go to the 'singles group' and tell you how great a 'single's group' we have, because you obviously need to be in single's group so you can get married, and maybe, just one day, be an important part of this church establishment system, which you are not at this present time. So we're going to ignore you until you demonstrate some reason why we should pay attention to you, and the best way you can do that is that start dating one of our undatable women in the 'single's group'.
 
M

Married_Richenbrachen

Guest
#20
#20
I hate when Christians say "Jesus was a Jew", as if they're implying He was one of the Pharisees who call themselves Jews today.

Like 1disciple above, I also hate it when church goers measure success in numbers rather than adherence to scripture, and are more concerned about man-made program/s than God-directed living.
 
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