Prayer to overcome bulimia

[elleneater]

It's so common now that it's almost looked down upon because of how 'cliche' it is, as if it were an attention seeking thing. Thankfully my family/friends are not like that, and offer me support.
I feel I need a lot of prayer because binge eating and bulimia really destroy who I am, and I can't seem to be able to stop it. It does a lot more damage than people realise, and it just desintegrates your mind [as well as your teeth, stomach lining, metabolism, hair growth, skin, and sleeping patterns].
It's weighed me down for 2-3 years and I don't want it to be the thing that defines me. It feels like a selfish problem, because you don't realise how self centred you become. You don't have the energy.
I haven't felt worthy of love because of how I look, and have fallen short of a lot of responsibility because I haven't had the strength and confidence.
Sorry for the essay ^^


Thank you for your prayers,
God bless -
el

 

[NodMyHeadLikeYeah]

Ellen, Im so sorry to hear your going through this. I feel for you. I just prayed for you and i will continue to do so.

 

[juanddperez]

I'll pary for you, but girl, you have to do your part as well. If you're the girl of the picture 'Old School' let me tell ya that you look nice (very nice), how can you think you need to lose weight? but I know it's part of the thinking that comes to your mind when you are having those troubles with eating.
I recommend you to do some sport! like swimming for example, it'll make you know that you're losing weight normally (and make u hungry also ), other thing, try to find other people with the same problem, it helps.
'Haven't felt worthy of love for how you look?' let me tell you, that's a cheap lie! but again, that's part of 1st the eating disorder and 2nd the delusion of nowadays society that tells you that you have to be just bones to look pretty, althought, you must have a correct weight (and by correct, it includes not being just bones) but for health.

Don't fall, pray, trust yourself, sport, try to control it!

¡Ánimo!

Dios te bendiga.

 

[pickles]

Hi elleneater, my sister- in -law battled this so no explaining needed here.
You are in my daily prayers for overcoming this and a compleat healing.
Hugs and God bless, pickles

 

[elleneater]

thank you so much for all your beautiful prayers -

it means so much to me to have that support from what the world calls strangers, but what the father calls family.

You all have such tender spirits, thank you so much ...
love el xoxo

 

[grace]

Natalie Grant wrote this song out of her pain/praise to overcome bulimia. It is a fantastic song that has ministered to me, although I do not deal with eating disorders...it has begun a work in my heart.
She might even have information on her websites or fan pages about eating disorders as well. Praying for you. Continue to overcome!! Your burden is heavy, but his yoke is light!

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6RezoHKni0[/video]

 

[Planetshaker]

Hey Ellen,
I know I haven't really spoken to you before but I've seen you around and you seem like such a beautiful girl
I've had small insight into what you're going through right now, it didn't last as long for me but I know how painful it can be emotionally and how hard it is to deal with.
Just remember how incredibly special you are and how absolutly gorgeous God made you, and I'm not just saying that coz its the right thing to do, you really are!
I'll definately be praying for you, and I'm around a lot if you ever want to have a chat or need anything at all.
Remember your precious <3
much love
Amber xoxo

 

[bobie]

what about this, just eat a slightly moderate meal every 4 hours! if you get hungry before the 4th hour then just have a little snack anyway ill pray for you friend!

 

[Belgian_Pilot]

Yikes. I can't really give some good advice, because I'm not familiar with that problem, but I can pray for you.

 

[elleneater]

Thank you for the beautiful song Grace, very sweet of you ...
the burden is heavy but the yolk is light. i love that. Hadn't heard it in a long while but it is comforting to hear it again. Lord knows I need prayer, because I can't conquer this on my own.

thank you again for your thoughts,
xoxo

 

[elleneater]

And thank you planetshaker for your thoughts, it's endearing to know that people have a heart to think of you like you do.
and thank you to everyone else again for your prayers, much appreciated
still a hard thing to stand over, but i am sure the day will come

 

[SeekinHIM]

Wow, what a most beautiful song Grace......Thank you for your insight.....



SeekinHIM

 

[firefly430]

Ellen, I just came across this and I will definitely pray for you! You are a beautiful woman and God has made you that way. I barely even know you and I already love you, after all we are sisters in Christ. I will pray for you and I'm here if you need a friend. Remember, your not alone.. not only do you have God but you have your family and your CC family here.

Much Love to you, girl!
Becky

 

[seas]

"I will praise You,for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;Marvelous are your works,And that my soul knows very well."Psalm 139:14.Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder and is just skin deep.King Jehoshaphat was very wise by appointing people to praise God and God inturn gave him victory over his enemies.So if we focus on God then He would give us victory over any problems.Tell your problem as to how Big your God is.

 

[HolyTriX]

Man looks at the outward appearance, But God Sees the Heart.

Who do you seek to please? Man or God?

If you know then that God see's your spirit. Do you think he judges you on physical appearance?

God Loves you no matter what.

Just something to think about:

Better to put confidence in God rather then Man.

I'll be praying for you darlin.

 

[Lyndies]

Thank you for sharing this. I'm praying that the Holy Spirit would give you the understanding that Jesus already took down any kind of sin and hold sin has on us. And I'm praying that you would have the wisdom to know how to find your strength in Him, who has alreday conquered. You are strong. :]

 

[trustinghim]

Dear One,

The Lord is with you and He will take this head on for you, the battle is not yours but His. I know because I was anorexic and bulemic, binging and vomiting sometimes 7 and 8 times in one day. I crawled into a church one day, sure I would die if God did not intervene, but alas He did, I was instantly healed and never even thought about it again until ten years later when I was at my boyfriend's house whose mom was a medical doctor who counseled women with this problem in her home office...it was there that I felt the spirit behind this thing trying to reattach to me. I was able to resist it by grace, but I recognized then that it was a spirit and not just a mental disorder...there is no hope but Jesus so rest in Him and let him beat up this bad guy. Lord, I renounce the spirit of bulemia in this beautiful lady's life. I cancel the assignment of confusion and death over her and command this demon to leave her now, never to return. Thank you that she has shared this in the light, where the darkness is now dispelled and I command her to be left alone from this spirit forevermore.

By the way, it may not help to hear this but I will tell you that you are a very beautiful woman. Not because you are thin and gorgeous, but there is a strong light that shines from deep within you, I can sense it in my spirit. You are one that will help many and so don't worry, God is closely watching over you.

Your sister

 

[Ellie]

Dear One,

there is a strong light that shines from deep within you, I can sense it in my spirit. You are one that will help many Your sister

Yes, so true - I've noticed this as well!

I know exactly what you mean about certain dysfunctionalities become cliche and seen as attention seeking.

That thinking frustrates me, because even if someone were seeking attention, when you break it down and think about it, people who are seeking attention, probably need attention!

Imagine looking at a starving child and saying to others - "Oh don't go giving them anything, they're just looking for food." Becuase someone is looking for something you should make sure they don't get it?

The child would be looking for a considerably larger amount of food than most people would ask for, but that's because they are starving! Someone who needs attention, whether they are aware of it or not, and whether they are looking for it or not (often they are not because of the stigma that comes with doing so) has usually been deprived and abused of something they need emotionally, and requires extra love to heal the wound. If they can't get it, the void manifests itself in other ways. Like Bulemia. Or depression. Or insomnia. Or self-harm. And many, many other addictions and urges.

I didn't mean to carry on about that for so long, sorry.

I have never had bulemia, but I have certainly had my share of dysfunctional eating problems and plenty of other "addictions" and "urges". And I know what you mean when you talk about how destructive it is. And what it's like to talk about it casually when people just have no clue about the "world" you have to live in.

I often think that sometimes the more weight that is pushing down trying to disable you, the more threatened by you it means Satan is! He knows what you're capable of achieving when you get your stuff together, and he's so terrified of that day that he'll do all he can to disarm you! And he should be afraid. What he's afraid of the most is that you'll realise it.

Go easy on yourself looking at your problem as "selfish".

(Wow, I never give advice this directly - I hope it doesn't come off top-down. Please know that I have the upmost respect for your individuality and assume nothing).

I know that it can be easy to become self-absorbed and lost track of where your heart is, when you're dealing with pulling yourself together (at least I know this is how it's been for me)... I also think it's important to realise that it is one's harmed sense of self that brings on these types of problems in the first place, and if you're not careful you can keep casting off the grace that you need to be able to fully receive in order to find healing. Know what I mean?

Something I'm having to learn and re-learn every day, is to just "let" God love me, and not to try to earn it. You can't anyway. It's such a simple truth and becomes so cliche that it gets overlooked in it's fullness.

"Trying" to get God's love to impact your life is something like trying to fall asleep. Laying there saying "Go to sleep! Come on! Sleeeeep!" ties you up in such knots that you can just never drop off. Never fully relax, preventing sleep from ever coming.

"Come on God, give it to me - give me the revelation of your love. I want to get it right, I want to please you, give me your love, give me your love so that I can get it right.."

You'll never get it right (talking to me), until you stop trying so hard to get it right. Just let him love you. It's ok that some "responsibilities" seem a little loose for a while - the more tied up in knots you are about coming out of that place, the longer you end up staying there. Let it take how long it takes, and just drink in God's mercy.

I feel frustrated that there really are no words I can say to express this properly, and that I'm saying bold things that make me feel judged as unintelligent when people try to tell them to me!

But the beautiful thing about that is that I'm going upstairs to pray now, for you and myself and others who suffer, and I know that the Holy Spirit will do a much better job than I ever could of making things right.

Thanks so much for sharing, it's encouraging and refreshing to hear raw honesty.

You so didn't write an essay. Don't appologise for being real, and taking time to let yourslef say what you need to!

Much love,

Ellie

 

[elleneater]

Again ... thank you all for your wonderful truths, it is so so appreciated. I come back to this page to find some strength to keep starting afresh, and feel reason for my actions .. and I am blessed to have gotten such a response.

Trustinghim: I feel so tramendously blessed to have read your testimony. My heart throbs to hear other people's trials, but I'm so glad to receive that love from you. It's reciprocated. Thank you for your prayer, and for sharing your thoughts.
There's an annointing to your words, a real wisdom from your experience that I am so so thankful to receive.
Ellie: thank you so much. thank you. I'm so touched that you wrote all that in an effort to help a stranger, and i'm compatible with a lot of what you were saying. And worry not, you weren't misunderstood or too forward at all - I love the honesty you gave. I need honesty now, how could I possibly take offence? You made me realise all the more that I cannot, in fact, 'earn' Gods love ... that I don't have to agonise over my failures but only have to ask for forgiveness and I'm saved again. And you know, you are so right - you kinda took the veil from my eyes; I think God's love is most appreciated when we surrender ...
what a beautiful way of looking at our way to accept Gods love: surrender. That's so incredibly beautiful. Beautiful is definitely the word.

thank you guys, your prayers have done more than perhaps you'll know. because when i don't have prayer, i am so much more weak and fragile. but with them, there is this subtle bubble of protection that looks after me. i'm so blessed to have your prayers. Thank you, and thank you again.
much love -
el

 

[elleneater]

"I will praise You,for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;Marvelous are your works,And that my soul knows very well."

- that's one of my favourite verses ... fearfully and wonderfully made. That's so powerful....

Psalm 139:13-17
13 For You formed my inward parts;
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;[a]
Marvelous are Your works,
And that my soul knows very well.
15 My frame was not hidden from You,
When I was made in secret,
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.
16 Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed.
And in Your book they all were written,
The days fashioned for me,
When as yet there were none of them.

17 How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!
How great is the sum of them!