A question for the ladies (not exclusive)

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Nini

Guest
#1
So my fiance isn't a virgin and I am. He had sex with his ex before me. lets just say I am anxious about it. He understands that I wanted to wait and respects it. should I worry about it cuz, well, I dont want to be bad...
 
Mar 17, 2012
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#2
Ive been married amonth and becasue of uterus cancer issue we have not bben able to comsumate our marriage and his understands. He still marryed me.

Ive been a virgine till my medical prceedures, never know a man. My husband isnt.
the only thing i can say it dont worry about it, you'll be fine. hint you may want to pick up some gossep magazines at the store. they sometime have some good imfo
 

Lucy68

Senior Member
Jan 21, 2011
2,538
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#3
No....don't worry about it :)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#4
Speaking as a man, who is not a virgin himself, if i were truly in love with a woman and wanted to marry her, her inexperience would not phase me a bit. Sex in general is kind of hard to make 'bad'. But just being able to be with you, as his wife, in that manner, should be enough for him, and probably will be. Its not all about the action, but its about the connection, and that doesn't require experience.
 
B

Barbie

Guest
#5
Your fiance loves you and has respected your request to wait. Don't worry about being a virgin and inexperienced - your new husband will be your friend, lover and confidente - as will Jesus. Amen
 
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Nini

Guest
#6
:) thank you guys :)
 
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THE_DOCTOR

Guest
#7
well there is a difference between the two of u...he had an experience means that he tasted someone before u ....and that won't make u special to him unlike if u were the first one in his life....that why it's not allowed to have sex before marriage....because both partners will be having experiences with someone else and that won't make theme special to each other....but on the other hand...imagine when both man and woman keep their selves virgin until they get married....each one will be the first one for his partner...and that gives a special atmosphere to the relation and maybe the reason for it to last like for ever ....because we human tend to have a special feeling for the first things we do or have.....ever remembered how u felt about your first car....your first computer...your first time getting a job and the list is open....same thing when it comes to sex....the first one is always so so so special....so if u make sure that first one is your husband/your wife....well every marriage will be okey....and to do that...both men and women should keep their selves for marriage....let's kill the idea of pre-marriage relations...coz that's just a lie....and for women...if the man pretending to be your boyfriend is really in love with u well he would wait until u both get married and then have sex....otherwise..how do u know that he is not pretending to be ur bf just to have sex with u ....coz he can leave at any given moment...but it's not the same in marriage.....anyway...i wish u good luck
 
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DonconCafe

Guest
#8
I am a virgin and I am waiting for my husband. I believe that if he had sex already its ok because when it come down to it you will be special to him. Let us just say that you never been with no one but your husband, you never kiss anyone but him, you never had a bf but him. You will never compare no one to your husband because there is no one to compare to. He has that opportunity to compare but he will feel bad because of that reason. You have the opportunity to give him a gift of pure love and respect for one another. In the book of Ephesians 5:25 "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her". Your husband loves you because he respects you and your request to wait. God Bless
 
Dec 14, 2009
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#9
So my fiance isn't a virgin and I am. He had sex with his ex before me. lets just say I am anxious about it. He understands that I wanted to wait and respects it. should I worry about it cuz, well, I dont want to be bad...
Not one bit. Guys (in all honesty) aren't as worried about how good someone is in bed as girls are about guys. generally men like to take control, and as such, the woman's 'skill', isn't very relevant. So you're actually at an advantage. In fact, he's probably brimming with pride about the fact you have never slept with anyone. Lie back and enjoy.
 
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Elizabeth619

Senior Member
Jul 19, 2011
6,397
109
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#10
So my fiance isn't a virgin and I am. He had sex with his ex before me. lets just say I am anxious about it. He understands that I wanted to wait and respects it. should I worry about it cuz, well, I dont want to be bad...

Keep in mind that sex is only PART of a marriage. It is part of the marriage covenant, but is not the most important part of a marriage. I am guessing your fiance is not marrying you just so he can have sex with you. As far as it being "bad"... when you truly love someone... well that right there makes the difference. Would you two be having sex just because it "feels good" or because you love each other and that is a way of expressing it?
Try not to worry.
 
J

Jullianna

Guest
#11
Nini, your fiance loves YOU. He's marrying YOU for the person you are. That says alot about him. It also says alot about you. :)

You will be fine. :) A man who respects your decision in this regard before you are married will most certainly be patient with you once you are married.

May your marriage be blessed.
 
Jun 8, 2012
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#12
For a person to WAIT and save themselves for marriage is very commendable. Many people today get together and have sex outside of marriage and expect God's blessings. NOT GONNA HAPPEN! God is a holy and righteous God and he can NOT work outside of the frame work of his own word, meaning he can not and WILL NOT bless sin. So many blessings as it seems you have found the right one.
 
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strawberryfizz

Guest
#13
I so agree with everyone else who says yours shouldnt be a problem. :)
Remain pure till after the wedding as that is God's will.
Stay blest! :)
 
G

greatblue

Guest
#14
Many people today get together and have sex outside of marriage and expect God's blessings.
It is staggering. People rationalize it, especially when they are young and immature, and allow themselves to believe that even though they are not "married" that God knows their hearts and that they are "in love". It's a massive problem because world culture justifies it all as it keeps skewing what sex and intimacy means.

A friend of mine at a conference in NY just sent me this quote from a speaker: "Premarital sex is like enjoying a $5 Rolex watch." Nick Vujicic ...it made me laugh.
 
Dec 14, 2009
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#15
It is staggering. People rationalize it, especially when they are young and immature, and allow themselves to believe that even though they are not "married" that God knows their hearts and that they are "in love". It's a massive problem because world culture justifies it all as it keeps skewing what sex and intimacy means.

A friend of mine at a conference in NY just sent me this quote from a speaker: "Premarital sex is like enjoying a $5 Rolex watch." Nick Vujicic ...it made me laugh.
People also rationalise other sins, including YOU. Including ME. Including many people.

Why are people's focuses for 'the unbelievers' and 'those horrible people' always on sins the person pointing the finger doesn't commit? Sin is sin.

You may not have sex outside marriage, but I'm sure you do lots of others sins.

Log from one's own eye.
 
Dec 14, 2009
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#16
People have sex outside marriage generally cause they don't believe there's a God. Generally because us 'Christians' like to be elitist and judge every one that isn't a christian. Tell them about their sins and their horrid way of life and how their gonna burn while us prideful arseholes get free? Don't think so.

LOVE? My arse.

Log from my own eye. I oppose people who like to act like they don't commit a sin. That's the only group I oppose. Pharisees.
 
Jun 8, 2012
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#17
I would like to think that there aren't just a few good men, but WOMEN as well who love God enough to WAIT for that special day.
 
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Ugly

Guest
#18
People have sex outside marriage generally cause they don't believe there's a God. Generally because us 'Christians' like to be elitist and judge every one that isn't a christian. Tell them about their sins and their horrid way of life and how their gonna burn while us prideful arseholes get free? Don't think so.

LOVE? My arse.

Log from my own eye. I oppose people who like to act like they don't commit a sin. That's the only group I oppose. Pharisees.
Loveless, elitist and prideful? Sounds like your own posts.
 
G

greatblue

Guest
#19
People also rationalise other sins, including YOU. Including ME. Including many people.

Why are people's focuses for 'the unbelievers' and 'those horrible people' always on sins the person pointing the finger doesn't commit? Sin is sin.

You may not have sex outside marriage, but I'm sure you do lots of others sins.

Log from one's own eye.
I was only talking about professing believers. The post I responded to eluded to those who had premarital sex and were expecting blessings from God. Do nonbelievers expect blessings from God? You've confused me a bit...are you offended and did I attack you? While my post was entirely general in scope, you managed to hone closely in on me. Love the Lord and spare the ammunition?