Not believing in marriage

What is your take in people not believing in marriage?My mom and her bf have been together for a good 10 or 11 yrs,and have never gotten married,the thing is,is that my mom's bf doesn't believe in marriage because he was married to this woman,when they got a divorce,she took everything,all of his furniture and all of his money,so from that experience it made him not believe in marriage,but I know that he loves my mom very much,and wants to be with her,even if their not married.

One reason that people chose not to get married, even with living together for years is the fear of the unknown. Ultimately, it is a lack of faith in their own judgment. It is best to trust the judgment of God. I am sure that your mom's boyfriend is completely committed to their relationship and loves her very much.

So basically, it's not that he doesn't believe in marriage. He just doesn't want to take a chance of getting married and having your mom clean him out like his last wife did.

I just told my daughter, Melisa today the date tourist and I have set to be married which is November 27, 2014 and asked if she and her boyfriend Ray would like to make it a double wedding as they have lived together for almost 5 years now plus dated an additional year.

Melisa is opposed to getting married and I hope it is not my fault being afraid to remarry for 35 years myself. I asked her to at least consider it as it would be cool to me to get married on the same day that my daughter did although I am the instigator in this arrangement.

We talked a bit about why she doesn't want to get married as Ray has asked her to marry him many times and has given up asking her. She asked me why so fast as tourist and I have known each other since spring this year. I told her when it is right you just know. Of course there has been a lot of prayer at least on tourist's part and some on mine as I never knew what to ask God for in a relationship. Tourist on the other hand knew what he wanted. I had just asked God to please let me do it right just one time in getting married and that I wanted God to have the number one spot and that my husband would also agree with that. I also told her that I trust tourist and that we are best friends, plus we are going through pre-marriage counseling.

She at least said she would consider a double wedding on Thanksgiving Day. I said well at least yours is not a short term relationship since you have 6 years invested. Who knows what will happen on November 27th, 2014, but this mom is praying for a double wedding.

I do not know the formula. Since saved and filled with the Holy Spirit in 2009, I had prayed for a spouse because I felt as if God was opening my heart to this idea, to my once closed heart about this. Two separate times, I had specific horrible disappointments. The first was when I wrote all specifics to God all down, and prayed that God be first for both of me and a future spouse, and wanted a man and marriage that honored God. I was led to a church and this specific man showed up one day!!! We talked and were friends for three months. He left the church and married someone else. Another time, I did an even more specific prayer and wrote it all down and within months a man showed up with all the qualities. But, he also decided no and said that he thought I was too good for him. This was horrible for my heart so I just stopped.

Now I just rededicated myself to singlehood and the Lord, and he led me to another country and I feel no desire for a spouse, or to pray or be with a spouse. I feel like freaking mother Theresa as I just help and work with university students for all my time. I have lost total and all desires for this and NEVER will I pray for such a thing. I also pray against anyone praying this for me, because of the deceptive hurtful men who have shown up in my life. So, I think my experience of praying like this to be very dangerous for my heart. Just sharing my experience. Sorry if I derailed this thread, but I do not believe in praying for a spouse anymore. I think it is tough when you pray for it, and the other person makes a choice to go another way.

I am happy for you Tourist and JesusLives!!! This is exciting news!!!!

I had given up on a spouse too and single for 35 years. I didn't know what to pray for and didn't know if I should pray for a spouse. I had just expressed a desire to God that one time I would like to do a marriage right where God is in first place and that the man would feel the same that God be in first place. I just lived life and made mistakes during the 35 year period but since 40 pretty much nothing as far as relationships just accepted single life and lived.

Tourist was the one doing the praying and God had our paths cross. We both want God to be the head of our relationship and then I will gladly submit to tourist as a husband because of this letting God lead the family. It is my first time to be in a love triangle and it is the most wonderful relationship I have ever experienced.

Praying that God is with you in all aspects of your life and in your service to Him. I had given up on relationships and men, but you never know how God will lead in your life just keep following Him. God bless in your walk with Jesus.

So basically, it's not that he doesn't believe in marriage. He just doesn't want to take a chance of getting married and having your mom clean him out like his last wife did.

I just told my daughter, Melisa today the date tourist and I have set to be married which is November 27, 2014 and asked if she and her boyfriend Ray would like to make it a double wedding as they have lived together for almost 5 years now plus dated an additional year.

Melisa is opposed to getting married and I hope it is not my fault being afraid to remarry for 35 years myself. I asked her to at least consider it as it would be cool to me to get married on the same day that my daughter did although I am the instigator in this arrangement.

We talked a bit about why she doesn't want to get married as Ray has asked her to marry him many times and has given up asking her. She asked me why so fast as tourist and I have known each other since spring this year. I told her when it is right you just know. Of course there has been a lot of prayer at least on tourist's part and some on mine as I never knew what to ask God for in a relationship. Tourist on the other hand knew what he wanted. I had just asked God to please let me do it right just one time in getting married and that I wanted God to have the number one spot and that my husband would also agree with that. I also told her that I trust tourist and that we are best friends, plus we are going through pre-marriage counseling.

She at least said she would consider a double wedding on Thanksgiving Day. I said well at least yours is not a short term relationship since you have 6 years invested. Who knows what will happen on November 27th, 2014, but this mom is praying for a double wedding.

How has feminism and gov't made marriage a bad option for men? I don't understand what you mean.

I do not know the formula. Since saved and filled with the Holy Spirit in 2009, I had prayed for a spouse because I felt as if God was opening my heart to this idea, to my once closed heart about this. Two separate times, I had specific horrible disappointments. The first was when I wrote all specifics to God all down, and prayed that God be first for both of me and a future spouse, and wanted a man and marriage that honored God. I was led to a church and this specific man showed up one day!!! We talked and were friends for three months. He left the church and married someone else. Another time, I did an even more specific prayer and wrote it all down and within months a man showed up with all the qualities. But, he also decided no and said that he thought I was too good for him. This was horrible for my heart so I just stopped.

Now I just rededicated myself to singlehood and the Lord, and he led me to another country and I feel no desire for a spouse, or to pray or be with a spouse. I feel like freaking mother Theresa as I just help and work with university students for all my time. I have lost total and all desires for this and NEVER will I pray for such a thing. I also pray against anyone praying this for me, because of the deceptive hurtful men who have shown up in my life. So, I think my experience of praying like this to be very dangerous for my heart. Just sharing my experience. Sorry if I derailed this thread, but I do not believe in praying for a spouse anymore. I think it is tough when you pray for it, and the other person makes a choice to go another way.

I am happy for you Tourist and JesusLives!!! This is exciting news!!!!

It seems many gov are feminist and ruled by women, instead of men (in that particular sense: Just seeking VOTERS same way "approving" same sex marriage).

Alimony should be IQUALLY share by both parents, not too often for men but... Life is a sad story on that, to many (not for me).